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  1. #1
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    Default Gender disappointment from others getting me down

    So I found out today I'm having another boy. He will be my second and last child. I asked everyone to guess before I announced just for some fun and every single person said girl with most saying they hope it's a girl.

    When I announced no one seemed excited and just sympathetic

    I had my hopes on a girl but I'm honestly happy bubs is just healthy but everyone else not being very excited is getting me down a bit . I haven't told my family yet either because they all said they want it to be a girl.

    What's so wrong with boys? I know there's heaps I'm missing out on with not having a girl but I still want to be excited thwt this baby is a boy!!

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    There is nothing wrong with boys!!! Your two boys will have so much fun together. Take time to get excited about the gender of your bump and don't worry about your family and friends being so insensitive. The outdated idea of a perfect pigeon pair is so ridiculous. You have a healthy baby boy on his way - how amazing!!

  3. #3
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    Big hugs on everyones reaction. Nothing wrong with boys at all!! But for some reason people think you need to have one of each to make you happy.

    In my situation i had one of each and when my son was born I was told by a few people that I did a good job by having one of each...... really? I dont understand why people just cant be happy for another baby to come along.
    Enjoy your two little men

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    Don't let others change how you feel. If you are excited regardless then run with that feeling!

    Some women get sad that they don't have a little girl just as some men get upset if they don't have a little boy. Perhaps because as humans we tend to be happy with the familiar and what we can relate to. Women like to have daughters to have mummy/daughter time because they imagine doing things like shopping or chatting over coffees together one day or putting them in pretty dresses like they like to wear because that's what they enjoy and feel that most girls would too.

    Men sometimes long for a son to play sport with or go fishing with or to get under the hood or a car with but in reality you can do any of those activities with any gender.

    I think most would like one of each gender or sometimes people just want one or the other but I think you are rewarded with whatever baby you were meant to raise 😊

    I knew someone who wanted a girl so desperately. She had a son from a previous marriage who was 11 and then went on to have children who were 8, 6, 5, 3, 2 and all boys. She then fell with twins and was sure she would have a girl. Her beautiful twin boys were born and she couldn't bond with them. She had put so much pressure on herself that she had stopped bonding with her babies from the 3 year old down because she was focused on getting her girl and it was incredibly sad to watch for those little ones.

    Nonetheless, I understand why there might be a slight disappointment because I equally want a girl and a boy. I would be equally sad if I never had a son as I would if I never had a daughter. I hope one day I can have a gorgeous little man so I'm happy for you that you are lucky enough to have two!

    Congratulations on the upcoming arrival of your beautiful baby boy!

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    I only have one child but when I was younger I always wanted a girl because everyone in our family always had boys first, and I wanted to break the tradition! When I first fell pregnant I had a feeling it was a boy and just before our scan my mood shifted and I said to hubby "it's definitely a girl" and it was! Hubby had some mixed emotions at first because he was hoping for a little boy, but the bond he and our daughter have is so incredible, he wouldn't change it! We would like a boy but will be absolutely thrilled with whatever gender we have in the future.

    Try not to let others opinions of your baby's gender get you down - it's your baby, not theirs! They'll get over it. Just enjoy yourself and your little men!!

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    I find this so strange. I recently gave birth to my 2nd boy (surprise) and everyone was more than happy, and focussed on the positive if anything. Most didn't make any reference to the gender.

    I did have people guessing we were having a girl before he was born though.

    Maybe because you found out and announced the sex before birth people felt compelled to comment? Not that they should be making anything but positive remarks.

    For the record, it's great having 2 boys. I wasn't disappointed when he was born, I thought I might have been because a girl would have been nice, but I was only ever focussed on delivering a healthy happy baby. I have had a lot of fun unpacking all of DS1 old baby clothes and being able to reuse clothes I forgot he ever had. And both boys are so different. I wouldn't know what to do with a girl 😂

    And with all the money I am saving on bubs wardrobe I can buy myself some new clothes! Don't let others comments get to you.

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    Default Gender disappointment from others getting me down

    I'm having a second boy and I got a lot of sympathetic comments and commiserations. Which made me doubt myself. Honestly my first boy is just so much fun and full of life, he's hyper and exhausting yes but he's cuddlier than any of my friends girls. Always was even as a baby.

    Two boys will be great, it's a wonderful privilege to raise little men and gosh do they love their mumma. I never expected the bond between mother and son to be so strong. Don't worry what others say.
    Last edited by Clementine Grace; 06-05-2016 at 17:46.

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    Tell the knockers to get ****ed

    Or you could say you tried to get an exchange for a girl but your doctor said they couldn't help.

    Or just say you are absolutely stoked to be having a second boy as girls are a big fat pain in the **** from 12-22

    Congrats !

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  11. #9
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    rainbow road is offline look at the stars, look how they shine for you
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    Default Gender disappointment from others getting me down

    There's nothing wrong with boys. They're awesome. I desperately wanted a girl, and found out I am having a girl this time (have a 2.5yo DS) and immediately I felt a bit sad because I think the idea of brothers is absolutely amazing!

    Having said that, gender disappointment is normal but it's not really fair of family to express theirs. This is your happy time, not theirs. I struggled with this before I found out what I was having because everyone on both sides of our family was desperate for a girl and not quiet expressing it. I ended up telling them rather bluntly I didn't want to hear another negative comment about the sex of our baby and they all shut up.
    Last edited by rainbow road; 06-05-2016 at 17:59.

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    I'm pregnant with number 3 which is a surprise, but have 2 girls. Every day strangers tell me 'oh, I bet you/DH are hoping for a boy'. I don't understand it either and it annoys me that everyone's preference is the opposite of what we have. Sometimes people comment that I don't know what parenting is unless I have one of each gender, or that DH is disadvantaged if this is another girl. I think it's just because they feel the need to comment and it's an easy option. It still annoys me and though I try not to let it, it does sometimes (hormonal days) make me question whether I should be happy if this baby is a girl.


 

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