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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by Californication View Post
    He wasn't yelling at a kid who has pushed buttons/being naughty. He was yelling at a BABY. An 8 week old helpless baby. Because he was asked to come home instead of staying out all night. Scum is harsh, but I'd be leaning that way too.

    I yell at my kids as sometimes as its what gets them to stop their bad behaviour. And I don't think that makes me scum. But I've never yelled at my kids because they interrupted my social life and I was pi$$ed off about it!
    Agreed, but as I said she's used words like she's assuming he's behaving in a way because of the boys night, she hasn't said he was feeling that way, she's just assuming so.

    I'm just trying to come from the point of view that there are mothers in this forum who suffer from PND and may have shouted at their own newborn baby before and we need to be careful that they don't go deeper in despair because someone has said someone who yells at a newborn is scum.

    Or possibly the OPs husband has PND. He was wanting to get out of the house for a taste of his old life for just 1 night and he felt that he couldn't enjoy it properly and yes yelled at his newborn (no matter what the context) but he could be suffering from PND perhaps too. Especially if the yelling was a one off and out of character.

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  3. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by turquoisecoast View Post
    fair enough.

    I still don't believe yelling at a baby is acceptable.
    Maybe that would be a good spin off thread. Put your hand up if you have ever yelled at your baby/kid..

  4. #33
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    Default moody husband after a boys night.

    Quote Originally Posted by turquoisecoast View Post
    fair enough.

    I still don't believe yelling at a baby is acceptable.
    Look I totally agree, but we all make mistakes and no one is perfect. I think the main thing is did he feel bad that he yelled? I know I beat myself up if I ever yell at my kids. That's more a sign of scum or unfortunate mistake

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  6. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    Agreed, but as I said she's used words like she's assuming he's behaving in a way because of the boys night, she hasn't said he was feeling that way, she's just assuming so.

    I'm just trying to come from the point of view that there are mothers in this forum who suffer from PND and may have shouted at their own newborn baby before and we need to be careful that they don't go deeper in despair because someone has said someone who yells at a newborn is scum.

    Or possibly the OPs husband has PND. He was wanting to get out of the house for a taste of his old life for just 1 night and he felt that he couldn't enjoy it properly and yes yelled at his newborn (no matter what the context) but he could be suffering from PND perhaps too. Especially if the yelling was a one off and out of character.
    In these threads people always tend to make assumptions in favour of the woman.

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    Default moody husband after a boys night.

    PS just had a quick look and the OP has 2 children and there's a 4 year age gap so in re-reading the OP, I actually think the DH yelled at the 4 year old.

    Again, not ideal but we have all done it, I'm sure.

    OP is your concern the yelling or the entire boys night out scenario?

  8. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by babyla View Post
    A good friend of mine had a DH who yelled at their newborn. Suffice to say that was the beginning of the end. It's a messed up person who yells at a baby.
    I yelled at my 7 week old. Thank you for putting me in my place. Clearly I'm not fit to be a parent.

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  10. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    PS just had a quick look and the OP has 2 children and there's a 4 year age gap so in re-reading the OP, I actually think the DH yelled at the 4 year old.

    Again, not ideal but we have all done it, I'm sure.

    OP is your concern the yelling or the entire boys night out scenario?
    I thought that too but when I reread the op I wasn't sure.

    Look if yelling was an Olympic sport I'd be a gold medal finalist.

    But there's a massive difference between yelling at a kid because you've been up all night with a baby, or they're pushing your buttons and you snap after 2 hours of it.

    I read the op as he yelled because he couldn't stay out all night at his friends on the grog. That's a pretty c.rappy reason.

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    His anger comes from being resentful. Sit down and speak to him about it. There could be other reasons he is upset and is de stressing with alcohol. Tell him how it makes you feel. Maybe have a rule where each of you get a night off once a month. Don't use words like allow because that will p.iss anyone off. Tell him you want him to enjoy time with his friends but you also need his help. If you set rules up he will know where he stands and won't feel as though you control him. He knows he has his time and you have yours.

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  14. #39
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    Default moody husband after a boys night.

    Quote Originally Posted by GucciDahling View Post
    I yelled at my 7 week old. Thank you for putting me in my place. Clearly I'm not fit to be a parent.
    I'm sorry if you've taken my post that way. But I do think that yelling at a newborn baby is not a good thing. In the situation I was talking about he screamed in the newborns face to shut the eff up.

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    Nope mine doesn't.

    Op is this your first kid?

    If so, I will cut him *some* slack. All the guys I know took some time to adjust to fatherhood, it was kind of a shock to their system that they couldn't just do what they wanted to do anymore. At 8 weeks, Ye, my DH would have been pretty crabby as well.

    That doesn't excuse him of yelling at the kid though, it's hardly the baby's fault

    And yes, at 8 weeks old, I'd be arguing with my DH over the attitude as well.

    Hopefully you're able to discuss it more calmly in time and then he'll start to realise what's acceptable & what isn't.

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