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  1. #141
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    I don't think there has been judgment per say of living that way, more that as one income families we can't do that and still stay afloat financially. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a couple deciding both should work bc they both like a certain standard of living. I wouldn't change being at home for the world but I also know that my life may be another woman's private hell

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  3. #142
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    Quote Originally Posted by Blessedwith3boys View Post
    I'm glad you said "not always". We had a 3 year period of dh alone earning a little less than the amount you quoted. We had absolutely no stress, we saved, bought another property, did home improvements and could go away on weekends without having to budget. Life was simple and happy.
    We have also been at the other end of the scale being on the absolute bones of our **** at a time dh had an accident not able to work for 2 years. Life was tough, times were hard and we nearly lost all we had. The stress was aweful.
    We are now in the middle income bracket and life is good, we need to watch the budget a little but are comfortable. Life is much less stressful having financial security of some sort. For us having that financial security for our children is very important. For us we wouldn't be comfortable renting and having no property to leave them.
    Yup not always and really I'm only talking about families I personally know. Also families who have chosen to have a lower income semi permanently, or just don't earn huge wages not folk who are in a bit of a financial crisis or have to take a forced big drop in income. I can see how that would be stressful.

    I just think that level of what you can live on is so different for everyone.

  4. #143
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    Quote Originally Posted by delirium View Post
    I don't think there has been judgment per say of living that way, more that as one income families we can't do that and still stay afloat financially. There is absolutely nothing wrong with a couple deciding both should work bc they both like a certain standard of living. I wouldn't change being at home for the world but I also know that my life may be another woman's private hell
    I was raised by a sahm, which I thought was ideal...but she told me time and time again to have a career...and it got in my head ☺ I was a sahm for 7 years, but I went bat poo crazy the last three years, and my DH really needed me to ease some ofcthe stress he felt by being the sole income provider.
    He also used to commute the 1-1.5hrs each way when we first moved out together (before kids). But it was depressing him so we made the move. We discussed several times that we could move back...but we were both so unhappy with the thought that we couldn't bring ourselves to do it. We also figured by the time we added in the extra costs with travel and private school fees we probably wouldn't be much better off...so stuck it out, and were generally quite poor at times due to our choice. It was not always easy and fun having me sah, and we couldn't afford to stay here on one wage...so we chose two wages.
    Last edited by Full House; 22-04-2016 at 22:18.

  5. #144
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedV View Post
    There are also a lot of people who don't have this luxury and are forced to live in "saturated low ses areas" and God forbid send their kids to the "overfull public schools" with all those pesky low ses families
    I had to laugh at that original comment actually. Some people really have no idea how lucky we are in Australia ... Even in low SES communities.

    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1461328891.784265.jpg

    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1461328998.364097.jpg

    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1461329054.043661.jpg

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  7. #145
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    Quote Originally Posted by Full House View Post
    I didn't mean it like that. I grew up in the area I'm talking about, most of my family still live there, and my family are mostly working class. I am not the snob you are making out that I am. But, there is no doubt my kids have a better lifestyle living where we do. I'm glad we can send our kids to a small school of 250, and not to a school that has that amount of kids in one year.
    Did I grow up fine there? Yes. But I'm glad we had the option of being able to choose somewhere else to raise our kids. I'm not apologising for that. If you want to make out I'm a snob because it makes you feel better, go ahead. I'm anything but.
    It was a bit pompous.

    I understand moving away from a low ses area to want a better opportunity for your kids but I don't agree with the public schools being rubbish just because they service low ses areas and that they have 250 students in each year in primary school.

  8. #146
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    Quote Originally Posted by witherwings View Post
    I had to laugh at that original comment actually. Some people really have no idea how lucky we are in Australia ... Even in low SES communities.

    Attachment 80592

    Attachment 80593

    Attachment 80594
    Have you ever been to a remote aboriginal community?

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  10. #147
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    My parents were of the opinion that "people only live in the country because they are too poor to live in the city". No amount of trying to justify different lifestyles would get through to them. We live in a tiny town in the country. But we are surrounded by some of the richest people I know. We also have people here who literally live dole cheque to dole cheque. Our children, the "rich kids" and the "poor kids" all go to the same little 20 kid school. Where you live definitely isn't a the best indicator for how much money you have.

    I never planned to be a stay home mum and I went back to work after my eldest was born but I haven't worked since my second was born 4 years ago and I love it. I probably won't work again until my youngest (either my current youngest or the one we are planning if that works) goes to school. But I volunteer for a lot of stuff so I have no social/mental need to go back and we don't need the money. I like the flexibility that I don't HAVE to be somewhere so I am at every assembly, sports game etc. but this is what works for us. We live hours from the grocery store, movie theatre or fast food place etc but we love our lifestyle. It's definitely not for everyone though.

  11. #148
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    Quote Originally Posted by Clementine Grace View Post
    Honestly too, the families I know who earn more, so maybe 200k+ a year in household income, seemed way more stressed over money. Yep they always have a new car and lovely holidays but money seems to be more of a stressor. The pressure is always on to earn more. Not always, but often. It's often the families I know that do exist on one income of 60-70k and maybe rent because they can't afford to buy, who seem to have a simpler but calmer and happier outlook.
    When DH and I were both working (before we had kids) we were both stressed and DH was very depressed. He even went on stress leave for some time. It was very hard to watch. We made the decision for him to be a SAHD because I was the one who loved my job and wanted to have a career and I could earn more money than him. We have never been happier. We never stress about money, and we live well within our means.

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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedV View Post
    Have you ever been to a remote aboriginal community?
    Where we live is considered a remote aboriginal community but I don't think it's the same type as you are referring as there is a big variety in them.

  13. #150
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    Quote Originally Posted by BigRedV View Post
    It was a bit pompous.

    I understand moving away from a low ses area to want a better opportunity for your kids but I don't agree with the public schools being rubbish just because they service low ses areas and that they have 250 students in each year in primary school.
    Where did she say they were rubbish?

    A lot of people don't want to send their kids to schools with 250 kids in each year level. No matter what the ses of the school is.

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