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  1. #91
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    Quote Originally Posted by PinkTutu View Post
    It's not really that awful! It can be full on at times, but the rest of the time
    I am truly fortunate, I can leave at 4:30 and I can work from home. I am given way more flexibility than most in our business.

    I completely respect that not everyone wants to or is prepared to do this, but for your career to continue as it was pre kids (which was the vain of this thread) I do think you need to be prepared to be flexible with travel/remote access on days off/late night con calls.

    Looking forward to my mat leave... Def not counting down to that at all... 6 more months 😝
    I'm the person who won't go away for a night because I bf. I don't have someone at home to pick kids up and look after them at night. I do however keep my phone on me 24/7, regularly work on my day off if I can get care, work at home late at night, travel away with my child if I can get childcare in the town I am going to and heck I even appeared in court for work when my middle child was 5 weeks old.

    I feel like I do a lot of extra and it's important for my mental health and my family that I drawer the line somewhere.

  2. #92
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    And this thread is a prime example of why we still need feminism.

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  4. #93
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    God, this is depressing. I have been reading this for a few days as I'm about to return to work myself.

    I must say, I am very lucky from the standpoint that my employer offers flexible work arrangements. I am about to go back full-time while DH takes him parental leave, and then I'll go 3 days per week. I should be able to do this indefinitely, however I know I was passed up for promotion while on leave, and it's not likely until I am back in the game full time.

    What is stressing me out, is that we are planning to move overseas next year. While I will be with the same company (hopefully) I've been with for 11+ years, it's an entirely new network. If we didn't plan to keep our home here, and buy another, I'd probably tag out of the game for a while, but I'm too scared to financially.

  5. #94
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    I'm just wondering for those who have been discriminated against were you in the union? If so they couldn't help?

    As with @Wise Enough my workplace did something similar to one of my colleagues prior to me, (I was only the second one pregnant in our new organisation), I was in the union though, unlike them, and promptly was returned to my current shifts in my pre pregnancy role. Since then they know better than to try that again.

    Yes we need feminism but also we need unions too...

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  7. #95
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    For my personal circumstances I wouldn't say my career is ruined but it is seriously stalled and the males working full time in my role are getting promoted and me having two mat leaves and on fractional appointment is going absolutely nowhere. I'm also studying to help climb the ladder but again the degree that is taking the full time males 3 years to complete will end up taking me at least 5. So after having 2 kids my career will end up stalling for about 7 or 8 years and there is much more likelihood of gaining momentum again if I can return full time but with 2 kids including one of them under 2 years I don't think I can manage that for a while yet :-(
    My sister is in a career that demands massive hours and lots of travel. She is wanting to start a family but truly believes it will be the end of her career.

  8. #96
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Miss Sunshine View Post
    I'm just wondering for those who have been discriminated against were you in the union? If so they couldn't help?

    As with @Wise Enough my workplace did something similar to one of my colleagues prior to me, (I was only the second one pregnant in our new organisation), I was in the union though, unlike them, and promptly was returned to my current shifts in my pre pregnancy role. Since then they know better than to try that again.

    Yes we need feminism but also we need unions too...
    Not every occupation has a union to turn to. I have never belonged to a union as I work/have worked in a profession that theoretically should be capable of standing up for itself (lawyers). That said this didn't stop my career hitting a dead end due to children and blatant discrimination from the partners.

  9. #97
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Miss Sunshine View Post
    I'm just wondering for those who have been discriminated against were you in the union? If so they couldn't help?

    As with @Wise Enough my workplace did something similar to one of my colleagues prior to me, (I was only the second one pregnant in our new organisation), I was in the union though, unlike them, and promptly was returned to my current shifts in my pre pregnancy role. Since then they know better than to try that again.

    Yes we need feminism but also we need unions too...
    Union was useless. Totally useless for me. As schools are within their right not to offer part time.

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  11. #98
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Miss Sunshine View Post
    I'm just wondering for those who have been discriminated against were you in the union? If so they couldn't help?
    Nope, no union for my profession. I am a member of professional organisations which lobby the government about IR issues in a general sense (usually about things that act in employers' favour!), but none would ever get involved in an actual IR dispute.

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  13. #99
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    Quote Originally Posted by GucciDahling View Post
    Mine hasn't been. But that's because I returned to work full time when DS was 5 months old. This was by choice. I could have taken longer, including paid leave I had accrued.
    However I wonder what it would have been like had I argued for part time. The Board Chair made it clear they thought the CEO should be full time, no questions. Even though they let the outgoing CEO work 4 days in her last 12 months - but that's another story.
    I was lucky. I had the income to pay full time care, a husband who is a farmer and whilst he can't take lots of time off consecutively, he's flexible enough that any time DS was unwell at childcare, he was able to do his fair share and more so than me to be honest.
    My organisation has an exceptional return to work record for women returning to work after bubs with 100% of staff who take parental leave returning to their own jobs when they return. Part time, full time, whatever. And I never deny anyone flexible work arrangements.
    But... This is in a social and community services organisation. It's a not for profit. Most of our staff are women, including managers. I've never made anyone redundant whilst on parental leave. I honestly had no idea of how tough it is for women in other industries, particularly corporate and for profit. I mean I'd heard about it sure, but never first hand from people who had experienced it. And it sucks.
    It's fantastic your org is so loyal to women on mat leave. I worked for a non profit in the same sector and also 90% women.. Second to lose my role on mat leave.. So angry..

  14. #100
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    Quote Originally Posted by NoteToSelf View Post
    My career is at a standstill. I'm treading water but that actually suits me, I work part time which in my workplace, means you do not get offered opportunities to act up when more senior staff are on leave and all management positions are full time. If I was happy to work full time, then I would still be able to progress.

    I already had my job when I got pregnant so had the entitlement to work part time, friends who have resigned from their jobs seem to be the ones who struggle to get their foot back in the door, particularly if they want part time work.

    It has been my personal experience that unless you are OK with your child being in child care for long hours, it is not possible for two people to climb the ladder. When there are kids involved, one person needs to take a step back to allow the other person the freedom to do the hours it takes to get somewhere. DH has had the opportunity to go further while I have been working part time as I am there to make sure the dinner is on the table and the kids are not spending 12 hours a day in child care, but, on the days I work he has to leave on time to get home to pick the kids up and get dinner done. It's not all or nothing, my job still pays the bills and I feel that working part time, I need to be fully there on the days I am at work.

    We share the carers leave as he has carers leave entitlements. If your hubby does not get paid to take leave that creates a stressful environment, my colleagues' husband does not get paid leave, so her 10 days a year has to provide sick leave for 3 people, it does not work, but if your hubby has paid leave entitlements, he should take them, it is about incremental change in how men are perceived in the workplace, they are parents too and need to be present.

    I think careers only really suffer if you want part time work, if you are happy to go in full time and do the hours it takes, then you will keep progressing.


    Very very true. Its not a feminist issues, its a parenting issues - and most of the time , there are two parents.


 

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