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  1. #151
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    Goodness @Tahli it's all systems go! What an amazing opportunity & I just bet you're going to get your take home bub!

    Hmmmm. I'm not in a great place. All week has been about DSS & DH & his ex. Affidavits, court documents, lots of nastiness, & a beautiful little boy crying his eyes out in my arms this evening...

    And I'm finding that today's emotion is jealousy. I just want a baby so desperately that I'm jealous of everyone - DHs ex, people who are cycling, people doing DE, anyone with a child - you name it I'm jealous of them :-(. I just feel like I'm doing nothing & I'm so torn because I know I'm likely too old to have a pregnancy of my own, but I don't know whether I should be doing some investigations like the hysteroscopy that I cancelled or a lap to look for silent endo etc - I'm so phobic of hospitals that I just won't do it & I get so upset that I could have something wrong but I'll never know.

    I don't know what to do to be honest. I just can't stop thinking about my five little babies that didn't make it & I just want to be pregnant again. I spent nearly nine months pregnant over 18 months & have no baby to show for it. Sorry for the downer :-(

  2. The Following 9 Users Say Thank You to Summer For This Useful Post:

    BlondeinBrisvegas  (15-04-2016),Blossom74  (16-04-2016),Bongley  (16-04-2016),Countrygirl72  (21-04-2016),faithandhopellove  (15-04-2016),JulieMalooley  (16-04-2016),Precious40  (16-04-2016),Tahli  (15-04-2016),winsor  (15-04-2016)

  3. #152
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    Thank you BIB you made me cry a little but in a good way. @Summer we should become booze buddies for the next month or so ha ha.

    So I got my call back at almost 6pm @BlondeinBrisvegas what do you think Warren is away from next Friday for a month so he offered for me to delay a month until he is back or he does my plan up and I do the rest of the cycle with Charlotte as in mainly for me ET (remote so scans are remote). I opted for Warren plan and Charlotte because I am impatient. Thoughts??
    Last edited by Maxwellsmum; 15-04-2016 at 19:43.

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  5. #153
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    @Summer I am the same at the moment so angry and jealous today I have spent 5 years trying for just the one baby. I had the big build up of transfer but now my body is failing me, my lining is failing me. I have been a bit emotional all day as well. My husband talks of football teams when I am so desperate for just one baby. I feel for you hun though, you have had so many losses it is very hard and it is unfair. Sometimes too been on forums any of them really and social media like facebook while it is helpful and you make some friends you can also feel left behind as well. Huge massive hugs from me straight to you

  6. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Maxwellsmum For This Useful Post:

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  7. #154
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    @Summer after the wk you have had you should feel all those things hun. To watch a woman use her child as a pawn when you so desperately want to be a mum it would be heart breaking. Your dss is lucky he has you. When is it your turn. I want you to be successful. Do what ever you need to do to make this happen. Hospitals proceeedures OE cycles etc. Do you have someone to be your strength. Is there anything you can do regarding your phobia of proceedures and hospitals etc? I wish i was your friend IRL so i could take you and make it all ok.

    @Maxwellsmum i hope you are self medicating with therapeutic doses of wine cheese and chocolate. We are here luv all the way. Go with asap plan i say. 😀

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  9. #155
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    What @BlondeinBrisvegas?? I didn't even know @Vixjc had gone back over? Did she do a fresh new cycle? What quality were the 3 she transferred? Questions, questions. This is what happens when 'secret' threads get closed down!!

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  11. #156
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    Gorgeous @Summer. What can we do to help you? What can we help you work through? How can we help you to start your OE cycle ASAP or get your DE cycle underway. If hospitals are such a fear, and possibly causing a delay, then just crack on with a DE cycle Hun. Break out your credit card and get reserving a donor and get her initial testing starting. Go get YOUR baby. Again, it is YOUR time.

  12. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Tahli For This Useful Post:

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  13. #157
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tahli View Post
    What @BlondeinBrisvegas?? I didn't even know @Vixjc had gone back over? Did she do a fresh new cycle? What quality were the 3 she transferred? Questions, questions. This is what happens when 'secret' threads get closed down!!
    Yes, she did a fresh Cycle for "Project Sibling" and transferred 3!!!

    She's in the 2WTorture atm

    I don't know what the quality was..Hang on and I'll PM you in a sec r.e about the thread

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  15. #158
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    You beautiful ladies make me cry!! In a good way, the love & support here is just amazing.
    @Maxwellsmum yes I'll be your wine buddy for the month - I'm about to go crack a red right now :-) I think your plan is the go - I would be impatient too & if your lining is good & Wazza did your plan then go for it!! Not long now hon & you will be well & truly up the duff!
    @infinity888 you are such a sweetheart & I thank you for words that mean so much. I don't have anyone to be a strength for me through this. My mum & I aren't close, DH doesn't want to know, my close friends are childless & don't want kids so don't get it & I have two friends who are quite new & both going through this but I'm too scared to deepen the friendships just in case they get pregnant but I don't as I would struggle with that... I prob just need to toughen up & just do what it takes but I feel silly looking into things like endo when any FS is just going to say I'm too old anyway... But then maybe I need to find out before I do DE anyway? I'll be ok, I'm just tired & emotionally exhausted after this week.

    Love you guys xxx

  16. The Following 7 Users Say Thank You to Summer For This Useful Post:

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  17. #159
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    @infinity888 I think we have to take the wins when we can, since it's such a journey full of more downs than ups. so celebrate your "high score" today. I am sorry for the ladies who've had none, that would be really upsetting

    hugs @Maxwellsmum & @Summer. I hope in one way there was a problem with your meds, so it would be a logical explanation for this month's lining. it's very disappointing not being able to transfer after such a build up, so it's perfectly understandable to be feeling as you are. I hope next cycle your lining comes to the party. there's all those embies waiting to try! and Summer, yes I get those twinges of sadness when I hear other announcements - I'm happy for everyone else, as it's their bub not mine, the one I wanted, but it does remind of the loss at times - you can't help think of your own situation when others say things. that's not to say they should stop sharing good news - it's also encouraging to hear everyone's news and I wish everyone well. I think it's normal to feel as you are too, and at least your talking about it rather than letting it all build up. hugs I've just ordered pizza, mostly for the chocolate mousse.
    Last edited by winsor; 15-04-2016 at 20:16.

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  19. #160
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    Quote Originally Posted by Maxwellsmum View Post
    Thank you BIB you made me cry a little but in a good way. @Summer we should become booze buddies for the next month or so ha ha.

    So I got my call back at almost 6pm @BlondeinBrisvegas what do you think Warren is away from next Friday for a month so he offered for me to delay a month until he is back or he does my plan up and I do the rest of the cycle with Charlotte as in mainly for me ET (remote so scans are remote). I opted for Warren plan and Charlotte because I am impatient. Thoughts??

    Yep..why not Luv?? It's Wazza's plan and if you trust that she'll put the emby's back in where they should be...and why wouldn't she?? Does she do unguided transfers like Wazza??? then do it I reckon!!

    If Wazza trusts her to do it and doesn't want to do it personally himself for whatever reason, then go right ahead Luv I say!!!

  20. The Following 6 Users Say Thank You to BlondeinBrisvegas For This Useful Post:

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