Hi guys, my 10 month old has been waking multiple times throughout the night for a fair few months now. He used to sleep through but I wonder if teething or separation anxiety or both are causing him to wake up usually at least 5 times a night, but anywhere from 3 to 7 times. I have to rock/ feed him to sleep each time and wait for him to get into a deep enough sleep to go back in his cot. He won't go if he's in a shallow sleep or awake, if I try to fight it there is hours of crying.
I used to cosleep quite often, but now I only bring him to my bed if I am just so exhausted and beside myself, as I don't really enjoy cosleeping, I need my space to have a decent sleep.
But I don't believe in the cry it out or controlled crying method. I want to teach him to self settle in small steps, I have lately been cutting his feeds down in the night, limited to two per night. Which has been quite successful but tiring as it takes him longer to go back to sleep. But next I want to put him to bed in the evening and day sleeps awake and try patting his bum, singing, etc. but at the moment this just stresses us both out too much and seems very impossible. I don't know if I'll ever get there anytime soon but I'm just trying to teach him to self settle for my own health and sanity.
But in the mean time I do want to give him all the love I can give and I really don't mind rocking him that much, I can tell its forming a special bond with us. But I just need to find a way to keep my own sanity, be able to function in exhaustion, and somehow able to get all my housework done as I only feel good if my house is clean. The only time I get to do housework and sleep is in my baby's naps, but that just isn't enough time for both as he only sleeps 45 mins twice a day. And he's very clingy when he's awake. He follows me around everywhere no matter who else is in the house, cries when I leave the room, will be worn for only a while, and play by himself for only a short while so housework while he's awake seems impossible.
I can get a bit of help from my family and husband, but they are very busy so I find it hard to organize a time. My hubby has always refused to go to him in the night, and the few times he has lately when I forced him to, bubs just cried louder and for longer, and I got stuck settling a screaming baby.
But as you see from my previous posts, I did used to be worried about my bubs bond with me, so I love the strong bond we have, it is everything to me. And I love the attachment parenting style because I want to teach bubs that I am there whenever he calls, and it's good to communicate his feelings. I am so happy and filled with joy because of my baby in my life, just exhausted at the same time.
So if anyone can help with either getting him to sleep more in the night and self soothe. Or even better how to function in this complete exhaustion and how to manage your time on days and nights between caring / settling / playing with the baby, sleeping and housework. I know there is no quick fix or one right way to do it, but I'm just at a point where I am beside myself with exhaustion so any tips would be appreciated.
Thank you so much in advance.