I have close ties with my local Indian community, & I dont know if @Rose&Aurelia&Hannah's mum would agree, but I find that the Indian community value 'people' so much more than we do. The elderly are respected and honoured, and taken care of, not seen as a burden. Similary, children are seen as a joy snd delight, not a burden. But there is a village mentality, where everyone helps out. Sometimes I feel like I was born into the wrong time or the wrong place, because I dont really 'fit' with our culture with how I see people. I do really feel for the parents, & I'm not criticising them. They must be feeling unimaginable pain right now.
A part of me feels this should be black and white.
But even my own feelings aren't that way.
As a parent, I would not want my child to continue with treatment if there is only a 50-60% chance of life for 5 years.
Equally, as a parent I cannot imagine refusing to treat my sick child.
Do I think these parents are wrong? NO.
Do I think the judge is wrong? NO.
But I do not approve of the doctor's intervening. If it was a 50-60% change of full recovery, awesome go for it. But it wasn't.
In general, I think this falls under 'parenting decision". Yes, each case is individual. But it is their child.
Apparently, "your child your choice" only applies some times.
I will give another example - if you have a 30% chance of surviving a particular cancer, this is the same as saying you will have a 30% chance of still being alive at 5yrs, and may well live 6yrs, 15yrs or till your 95yo...
My neice was given a 60% chance (of being alive at 5yrs) - she survived and is likely to have to full life.
Quality of life, disability, etc etc are part of a completly different equation - that should be taken into account - but is completely unrelated to the surviavla percentage
This is a really complex scenario and I really think the parents believe they're doing the right thing for their child. I don't think it's fair of this whole debate to dismiss their fears so easily and brand them as stupid. I cannot even imagine the terror of being told I need to radiate my child's brain.
If it was me, my own personal emotions would probably win out and I'd do anything to save my child. It's not me though, it's not any of us and it's so hard for others to tell those parents they don't know what's best for their own child.
I hope this story has a happy ending, I really, really do because it's so horribly sad, for all concerned.
It's hard to admit it, but it is a burden. For example, as a sibling, you have to factor in the point where you will have to step up as a carer or guardian when making life decisions. As a parent, you know that there may come a point that your child is going to have a huge responsibility placed on them, and that would be hard to accept.
As I work in aged care I have learnt there is one thing worse than death- that is prolonged surviving. I refer to it as surviving as it isn't living at all.
Why are people so afraid of palliative care? I know there are compassionate, wonderful doctors out there, but there are also others that are more "treatment" focused than "patient" focused - looking short term and treating the disease or illness but not treating the patient as a whole picture.
I don't know how I'd react if I were in their shoes. All I know is that I should be giving the right to chose if I'm mentally competent to understand and weigh up the facts, risks and possible outcomes.
Courts intervening when it isn't a clear cut case is a very slippery slope indeed.
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