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  1. #11
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    We have seen a dietician/paed/speech path/OT and not much has helped. She has always been incredibly difficult to feed. I don't usually react to her but tonight I'm just really hormonal etc and cried. Cried during meal time, cried during bath time and after.. Still teary now.

  2. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ahalfdozen View Post
    Oh and I should add, my son with autism refused dinner every day for a few weeks a little while back. But there was no harm done. He ate his breakfast and lunch just fine. And he was still as much of an athlete as always.
    Skipping dinner really isn't the end of the world I don't think. I, personally, would be far more concerned about missing breakfast or lunch.
    She would eat breakfast maybe 2 days out of 7

  3. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mamasupial View Post
    We have seen a dietician/paed/speech path/OT and not much has helped. She has always been incredibly difficult to feed. I don't usually react to her but tonight I'm just really hormonal etc and cried. Cried during meal time, cried during bath time and after.. Still teary now.
    Quote Originally Posted by Mamasupial View Post
    She would eat breakfast maybe 2 days out of 7
    Hugs hugs hugs. I had to start giving my DS vitamins/probiotics daily due to my worry with food.

    What does she eat? Is it the same texture? Will she drink any 'milkshakes/smoothies'?

    I discovered my DS loves soup. But it has to be pureed. And he had to have bread (without bits) to dip in and eats it that way.

  4. #14
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    I've tried healthy smoothies etc but she refuses. it's often dry/bland food she likes such as sandwiches, toast, weetbix, cheese.

    She's on probiotics but not vitamins. Last time she was measured was at 16 months and she was 8.7kgs and 75cms.

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mamasupial View Post
    But if a vent I guess. At what age do you offer dinner and if it's not eaten, too bad there's nothing else to eat?
    I asked this exact question on a different parenting page not long ago! I got heaps of replies but no one actually answered this question, they just lectured me on how how I was obviously feeding him wrong and what the "right way" to feed a toddler is - all things I was already doing But I digress!

    I decided that given his age and development, he's definitely not ready for the "you get dinner or nothing" (he's currently 21 months). He doesn't talk, so can't tell me if he's not hungry, or he doesn't like the taste, or texture or something else. And he wouldn't understand me telling him that he has to eat his dinner because there's nothing else.
    And if he goes to bed hungry, I'm the one who has to get up in the middle of the night to give him a snack, or try to settle him while he cries all night from being hungry - and that just sounds like torture for both of us!

    So I give him dinner, I try to eat with him whenever possible. I try to always include something I know he'll eat, like carrots or cheese. If he barely eats I'll offer something like fruit or yoghurt or crackers, and if he still eats nothing then I just brace myself for a big overnight breastfeed.
    I figure I'll take this approach until we can communicate a bit better, then get a little stricter. But not excessively so, I mean there are foods that I really hate as an adult - I wouldn't want to be forced to choose between eating mushrooms or going hungry so am not going to inflict that on my children. (Mushrooms for example)

    Not sure about the sensory part though, if that changes things!

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  7. #16
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    Default Help! I'm at my wits end!

    We have recently started telling our daughter that it's fine if she doesn't eat dinner but no fruit or anything else before bed, if she's hungry we'll warm her dinner up. I haven't even had to do it yet, just the thought of missing out on her beloved bedtime banana is enough to get her to eat.

    ETA I just saw that she's only 18 months old, I'm not sure whether she would understand that yet.

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    My advice after DD ("normal" eater who went through the fussy toddler phase ) and after DS (fussy eater, poor weight gains dreadful night sleeper) is completely different.

    DS is turning 3 in June and we have made amazing progress with his eating. He's now a 16kg boof, full of energy, made of muscle and sleeping through. He now explores every food put in front of him and most get licked or a small bite taken with no prompting (anyone who has had a genuinely fussy eater will understand what a big deal it is that he will do this).

    I was doing the "eat it or nothing else" when he was younger but it was just making everything worse. So I switched to keeping him full on what he would eat and continuing to offer "challenge" foods as well. Like PP, a meal would consist of 1-3 definitely eat(eg. A fruit/veg, a carb and cheese), one maybe and one new food.

    I have back ups in the freezer of things I know he will eat for nights when we're eating something I know he won't touch any of (but will put both in front of him at once).

    Most nights though I can modify so I don't need to cook a separate meal. Eg. Spag bol (won't touch anything mince) he gets plain pasta, grated cheese and carrot & cucumber sticks (used to be peas and corn before he discovered he likes raw veg). Or when we have stir fry, I pull out some veg and meat (now that he eats meat) before the sauce goes on and serve with plain rice.

    It's really hard to understand until you are faced with a genuinely fussy eater. The key for us has been keeping him fed and happy, plus not turning meals into a battle. If he's overtired or overhungry there is zero chance he will explore a new food.

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  10. #18
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    Very true. She can't articulate her needs. I just know that she doesn't want to eat. I do t think I could follow through with the "no dinner then" thing even if I feel it in the heat of the moment as her weight/growth is a stressor for me.

  11. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by deku View Post
    And if he goes to bed hungry, I'm the one who has to get up in the middle of the night to give him a snack, or try to settle him while he cries all night from being hungry - and that just sounds like torture for both of us!
    Yes! The well meaning to "not give in" because "he would eat if he was actually hungry"... uh sure, you wanna come around at 2am and feed my toddler Savoy crackers and a cup of milk because he's starving?!?

  12. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mamasupial View Post
    Very true. She can't articulate her needs. I just know that she doesn't want to eat. I do t think I could follow through with the "no dinner then" thing even if I feel it in the heat of the moment as her weight/growth is a stressor for me.
    I would do/did do the same.

    With the bland foods - I get that from DS too!

    I ended up trying to make things like pikelets (banana wholemeal) so he gets *some* fruit. Some healthy banana bread (took time and convincing) etc etc.

    Again - he is 3 and we still battle. But my win the other week was that he ate pizza with sauce. And cheese. And a little ham. And a little pineapple. When usually he peels it all off and eats the base.

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