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  1. #11
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    What she is doing is not ok, especially as you've forked out for a return ticket for her, but she's not coming. You have two choices, call out her behaviour and probably lose the friendship or let it slide, maintain basic comms on fb and hope that the friendship lasts the distance.

    I cut all ties with my lifetime bestie a year or so ago, it was a long time coming, and while I am glad I don't have to deal with the bs anymore, it left a gap that really can't be filled.

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    Naboo  (19-03-2016)

  3. #12
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    Dave's advice is great - what he said.

    Did you but the tickets based on text/before things were confirmed??

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  5. #13
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    You're not being unreasonable at all. Unfortunately I think you have two options - let it go and let the friendship die off without saying anything. Or be very direct and say you've drifted apart is there a friendship left to save. She clearly doesn't want to come for the visit and doesn't want to be upfront and tell you.
    A couple of months ago I did the latter with my best friend of 25+ years. I have an 8 month old and since I was pregnant she had not been very nice or supportive and we drifted apart. It was sad as she was fine with her other friends and families having kids but not me. I had to let the friendship go as I didn't have the emotional energy to worry about it or be hurt anymore.

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  7. #14
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    Last edited by Naboo; 20-03-2016 at 12:13.

  8. #15
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    Last edited by Naboo; 20-03-2016 at 12:15.

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  10. #16
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    I really don't think she's bought a ticket and can't think of how to tell you, so rather than confess, she's avoiding you.

    Can you change the return bound ticket? If you can and want to hold on to the friendship, maybe send her a message and say you have a feeling she didn't get around to booking the ticket and it may be too late/expensive for her to get a ticket now. Tell her you can change the ticket back to a date that would suit her better and put the weekend off, if it would be easier for her - and to let you know asap.

    Maybe giving her an out or a perceived understanding would encourage her to let you know either way. I'd not be happy, and my "understanding" would be pretty false.

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  12. #17
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    Last edited by Naboo; 20-03-2016 at 12:15.

  13. #18
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    Call her from a private/unknown number.

    If you bought the ticket and she does not show that is not fair to you.

    Is there any way you can use the ticket in place of her?

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  15. #19
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    Last edited by Naboo; 20-03-2016 at 12:16.

  16. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by Naboo View Post
    To be honest I don't want to talk to her I've had a tough time asjusting to my new town and would love to talk to a friend. The old friend in her would have called me by now to see how I'm travelling.

    If she hasnt bought a ticket I dont care about the money it's just forfeit.
    Give it time.

    Dont get hung up on it. Yes you can make new friends

    If your friend comes to her senses then great. If not her loss

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