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  1. #21
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    Hi @mummymaybe

    Sorry to hear about your loss. Did you get any answers as to why??

    We also use IVF to conceive.

    We fell pregnant 10weeks after our son was stillborn. It's hard to explain how we knew we were ready....

    Emotionally we got to a point where we realised that we were as ready as we would ever be. The initial grief stage was over for us, and we felt that our life was as close to 'normal' again as it was ever going to get.
    I guess for us it was making sure we were through the initial grief and we were confident that we were starting again for the right reason - not just to help with the grief, or to replace our Son, etc

    Does that makes sense?

    And to be honest, we weren't 100% ready (I don't think you'll ever be),but we were as close to ready as we could be.

    I'm now 11 weeks, and to be blunt, it's really tough emotionally and mentally. Something you need to be ready for.

  2. #22
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    @mummymaybe

    And the other thing is from an IVF perspective. IVF is such an emotionally journey as it is. You need to be emotionally ready to face the possibility of getting a negative result.

    Sorry if I sound negative, just trying to be honest

  3. #23
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    Just popping in to say I'm thinking of you and wishing you a smooth pregnancy.

    Mummymaybe we are also IVF and my son passed away just 8 days old in December. I had an emergency CS though so they won't let me start IVF again yet. The waiting is torture but I guess its forcing us to have some down time. August is going to be a really tough month for us as its seems just about everyone around us is due in August.

    I'm sorry for all the losses in this thread. It's so heartbreaking that so many of us have been through this.

  4. #24
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    Thanks so much @Barca07 , I think you've put it so well. Our little guy had a major heart defect. We know we aren't replacing him and feel like starting again is important due to age and timing.

    We had an emergency c section as I had a massive bleed during my induction. Our ob is still happy to go ahead.

  5. #25
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    How long do u need to wait post c-sec until you can start again?

  6. #26
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    I think there are many different opinions on this. Our ob is certainly not a risk taker but she also isn't overly conservative.

    I had a very high incision due to gestation and that means I'm at higher risk of rupture during labour so will have an earlier repeat caesarean at 36-37 weeks.

    My ob said that the pregnancy itself isn't the main issue, but labour would be so as long as I don't labour there isn't an issue with trying as soon as we are emotionally ready. She said the risk of rupture during labour would never go away.

  7. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by mummymaybe View Post
    I think there are many different opinions on this. Our ob is certainly not a risk taker but she also isn't overly conservative.

    I had a very high incision due to gestation and that means I'm at higher risk of rupture during labour so will have an earlier repeat caesarean at 36-37 weeks.

    My ob said that the pregnancy itself isn't the main issue, but labour would be so as long as I don't labour there isn't an issue with trying as soon as we are emotionally ready. She said the risk of rupture during labour would never go away.
    I'm sorry to hear about your bubba. That's what we were told too. It's not the pregnancy but the labour. My OB was happy for us to get pregnant as soon as we are ready but my IVF specialist would like us to wait 6 months and at least three cycles because we need to do a full stim cycle again. That said they will do a scan this month at the 4 month mark and after my third cycle to see how my internal scar is looking and make a decision from there. We also have to consider age and IVF and not leave it too long.
    I've also been told it would be an early schedule CS around 36/37 weeks unless there is more than 20 months between the two births and then there is a possibility of trying for a VBAC if we want.

  8. #28
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    @SoReady it's good to hear that others are being told the same thing. Our ob works very closely with our fs so either will do our FET. Luckily the cycle that gave us Harry also gave us our first ever frozen embryos.

    I think if I had to do a full stim it would be very different. Are you trying naturally? There isn't much point for us (needed donor sperm) but if we could I would be.

  9. #29
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    We can try naturally but there's almost zero chance it would work. I have one blocked tube and one with a hole in it. If we had any embryos left then I think we could do a FET sooner but we don't have any left and it's because it's a full stim I think that they want to wait and make sure my scar has healed a bit. It was a pre term CS so they had to use a few extra instruments.
    This IVF is tricky business. Have you had your transfer yet?

  10. #30
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    Following this as we just got a bfp. It's been just over 2 years since our son was stillborn at 34 weeks. It has taken 6 rounds of ivf to just get a bfp. My body wipes out embryos as well as babies so I will be on eggshells this entire pregnancy.


 

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