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  1. #21
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    I went to a mum's group with both of my older two. I'm in no hurry this time to be honest.

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    turquoisecoast  (09-03-2016)

  3. #22
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    I went when DD1 was 2.5wks old.
    We had group facilitated by the mchn for the first 4/5wks then branched off into our own group.
    Almost 9yrs later we still meet up & keep in touch.

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    turquoisecoast  (09-03-2016)

  5. #23
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    I would go. When I was a new ftm I was nervous to go too but now I know how intense those first 6-12 weeks are and what a valuable resource my mothers group was. Without a doubt I recommend you go (if you can). Try not to worry about not 'having it all together'. Mothers group becomes the one place that you can let it all hang out. They will all be feeling exactly like you are. I think it's also important to have babies close in age. If you go to the next group your bub will be almost 4 months old. If all the others are 4-8 weeks it will make a difference.
    In terms of vaccs. I would be ok without them being given yet. The others will have theirs if possible and the mums will most likely be up to date with their whooping cough (unlike most adults you will encounter at Coles). Also the chn will likely know if any in the group are sick and will react accordingly.
    Good luck with whatever you decide. X

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  7. #24
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    Just wanted to add - it's ok if you don't make every session. Our first structured sessions went for a couple of hours, plenty of the mums came in late, spent most of the session outside rocking bub, left halfway, breastfed, bottle fed, dealt with poo explosions you name it! We were all in the same boat. Everybody understood of you rocked in late, all you had to say was "hard night" and everyone else had been in exactly the same situation at some stage.
    In WA it's based on a catchment so all the babies were within 6 weeks of each other. If you leave it for 3 months that critical newborn phase will have passed & you might find yourself in with a group of parents in a different "phase" I guess?
    Also my group was all FTM so no older kids hanging around spreading germs. I don't think a single of our bubs got sick until about the 3 month mark.

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    turquoisecoast  (09-03-2016)

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    I started when DD was about 3wks. In NSW, the community mothers groups are for first time mums with bubs up to 12wks old. If you want to continue after that, you have to organise it yourself. I got a great group of mums and a few of us are still friends after almost 5yrs and supported each other when second babies arrived as well.

    Honestly, don't worry about being composed. Every single mother in my mother's group cried in at least one session (I cried almost every week, I had a terrible time when DD was a newborn). Everyone understands. Some mothers would come looking fresh and ready for the day but most were practically in PJs with disheveled hair and no makeup most days!

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  11. #26
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    Also, I wouldn't worry about germs. Even if they've had their 6wk shots they're not fully immunised yet so theoretically there's always a risk. Vaccines won't stop colds/flus etc anyway and they're the most likely things bub will catch. Keep them in the pram or in your arms and they should be fine.
    If you have a second baby you'll wonder why you worried so much, DS had his 3yo sister all over him from the day he was born and I hate to think what kind of daycare diseases she's incubating at any given time!!

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    Mothers group was my lifesaver. No one understands what you're going through like others that are going through it. You won't need to put on any kind of fake holding it all together facade - everyone's pretty raw and honest, well by the second session anyway. I started when DD was about 2 weeks old and the oldest baby in the group is about 2 months older than DD.

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    Default mothers group - how young is too young?

    I would go. Three months is a long time to wait to meet people in the same boat as you. They don't do mothers groups here but one charity ran a 'bump to baby' which I went to while pregnant and then when DH went back to work at two weeks. But it was easy for me to get there, only about a 10 min walk.

    The vax thing wouldn't worry me, you'll be the only one touching him, he'll either be asleep on you or in the pram and everyone else is worried about their own babies so he's not *really* coming in contact with anyone else.

    I found being able to get out for a coffee and a chat with other moms a huge help for my sanity, it made me feel like I'd done something for myself for the day. I also had trouble breastfeeding in the beginning but didn't really mind trying in front of them because there were others struggling as well.

    Maybe ask the ages of all the babies? Join whichever one will be more your 'age.'
    Last edited by HollyGolightly81; 09-03-2016 at 22:46.

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    turquoisecoast  (09-03-2016)

  17. #29
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    ok thanks for all the input ladies. definitely feeling more like its a good idea to go down and at least see what it's like. as you all say, if I don't like it I can sit it out and return later on. I'll definitely ask the ages of the other babies at our appointment tomorrow.

  18. #30
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    TC, definitely try to go. As others have said, it's a potentially tremendous source of support in those very early weeks. Just chuck on some trakky-daks, bring a spew-rag, and rock up. No-one expects you to look gorgeous, or have it "together".

    My Mothers' Group was amazing...just very normal women. We all had our 2nd bubs around the same time too, so it was a "re-activated" support group also. 5 years on, and we still catch-up. Those intense few weeks of the newborn stage are when the support of Mothers' Group is really beneficial.

    Please don't wait. Jump in. I doubt very much you'll regret it


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