@winsor I'm so sorry for you and DP. it's heartbreaking.
Well, I've just got home from my business trip and logged on hoping for some good news after a shi!!y day, only to hear the worst news possible from @winsor.
Oh hon, there are no words I can say which will bring you any comfort I know, but I just wanted to let you know how very, very sorry I am for you and DH this evening. To get so far and then have all of that hope snatched away from you is just devastating and I am sending the biggest, warmest hugs I can your way. Please take care of yourselves and your little one while you still have him/her. And when the time comes that he/she is called home, I will make sure baby Blossom is there to meet him/her and hold their hand on the other side. I'm so very sorry for both of you
@Tahli, I have read over your POAS reports and whilst quietly cheering you on from the sidelines (as any good Stick Wh0re would) I still wanted to say that everything is still ok - it's just a wee bit too early hon! Personally, I wouldn't count myself out until around 12dpo so you still have a good 3 days up your sleeve as far as I'm concerned
I know you've had early BFP's before, but quite often they seem to burn bright and then fizzle out quickly. No, what you want is a slow and steady emby! Let those two little bubbas take their time in settling in if they need to, I say! Then when they're nice and comfy they can get to work providing stick artwork for you
I am sending you big hugs this evening too, but I really do think you're in with a good chance here hon.
@Gagingi, I'm sorry to hear that your 8 embies didn't make it. It must be so very disappointing when you actually can make the eggs but they come to nothing.
I must say I do like your 'can-do' attitude though. Onwards and upwards hey! It's marvellous that you have the option to continue on with another round or two
Hello to all the other lovelies and my apologies for not having answered any PM's as yet - perhaps I'll get around to that tomorrow after I've cleaned my bomb shelter of a house and had a good night's sleep!
I had my BT today and as I suspected, it's a BFN. I already knew that of course, so as we were discussing things I held it together quite well. I told my Nurse we wouldn't be proceeding with another OE cycle, and that whilst we'd given it a red-hot go I really felt there was little hope that I could achieve a pregnancy with my OE. I spoke of how I felt I had responded poorly and even when I did manage to get an egg fertilised the closest we came was not close enough. I suggested that we would like to proceed to donor eggs or donor embryos and that DH and I had lengthy discussions about that.
My Nurse said they did keep a list for donor eggs and donor embryos at their clinic. She said that donor eggs were quite rare at their clinic but from time to time they did get embryos donated, and would I like to be added to the list. I said yes, I would like to be added to both just in case, and immediately burst into tears. I told her that ultimately we didn't care how it happened, but that it HAD to happen somehow and we would be eternally grateful for a donation of either.
It had not hit me that the end of my OE journey was such a big thing until that moment. It's a big thing though, isn't it? I think I will be ok with not having a child that is genetically related to me, but I know I am not ok with not having a child at all. And so we move forward, into Donor Land.
Hugs to all the girls on our thread today. We are due for a dose of good news I think
It is a big thing yes but a decision that is easier made after suffering loss and failure and feeling like no matter what you just want to have a child of your own. TBH I don't really think much of the donor aspect that much yet but have had thoughts of how I might feel once I am UTD I worry about feeling disconnected from my baby in utero or that my baby might sence any thoughts that I have if I do feel a disconnection (weird I know). Then I have dreams of my donor baby where the feeling of love is so overwhelming and the baby is my baby 100%. Of course there is also the small part of me that is scared of donor embryos not working at all as well, ahhggg this never ends does it. Also I am sorry about your official BFN ☹️ and yes we do need some good news on here🌟
After we made decision to use donor eggs I was quite relieved and optimistic. Felt like I was finally in with a chance of pregnancy. Looking at CFC statistics being so high and the amount of young donors available made it seem possible. I don't feel disconnected at all, quite the opposite. While I will always be grateful to our donor I never think of these babies as not mine and sometimes I guess I forget that they are donor eggs. From the moment I got the BFP I knew they were mine. I look after them every day, eat right, take vitamins, rest etc. I'm taking care of them and without me and DH they wouldn't exist. Don't expect that to make sense to everyone just how I personally feel. @Tahli we need some good news here so get us that BFP in the next few days. @Windsor once again so sorry, hope your DP is home soon. @Blossom74 it's a hard decision and harder to say it out loud like you did today. Hopefully acceptance might be easier now. You will get you baby love no matter how you do it.
I think it's such a personal decision and every woman has to go with what they feel comfortable with. It's a bit like adoption really. I think it's fantastic that it's an option which is available, but for me - who has a deep need to grow a baby inside my belly - it wouldn't satisfy my urge. Donor eggs or donor embryos would though, and I have no reservations about not being genetically linked. Our child would still be like us, because it would be raised by us
Pregnant for the first-time?
Not sure where to start? We can help!
Our Insider Programs for pregnancy first-timers will lead you step-by-step through the 14 Pregnancy Must Dos!