hugs @Blossom74. I hope Baby Cakes makes an appearance later today or tomorrow
thanks @Chiefsgirl, i appreciate hearing you guys who are pregnant with DE perspective. I know you're both right and the fact that you have baby growing inside you gives you the same connection that any other mother has.
@Bongley when are you off to Canada? I hope you'll be ok doing the long haul flight with a bump!
hi to everyone
I've still got a full pack of FRER so no worries there.
Emotionally I just feel really sad and really unsure of what to do next.
Financially, I really think the only way forward would be to advertise and hope someone recognises something in me that would compel them to donate some left-over embryos to us.
I don't know how you make that sort of connection to someone though.
Yeah, very tired but completely excited @Maxwellsmum. It was so totally wonderful stretching out in my own bed with clean sheets at 1.30am. Heavenly. Now I have until about 5pm to myself before DS comes back from being away with his Dad for the long w.end. I'm going to pop to CW to buy more FRERs and then go and buy some healthy groceries.
@Bongley DS2 was very clever being fully hatched! No wonder your hcg was so high so early on!!
@JulieMalooley Are you going to be having a c-section at 37wks? What are you doing for your baby shower?
I'm 7.5dpo and praying like mad that my babies are physically attaching to me today. C'mon my sweeties, burrow on in!!
Last edited by Tahli; 14-03-2016 at 07:23.
tuxcat I'm off on friday. I am a bit worried about coping with jetlag and the emotional stress of the funeral but I paid extra for a direct flight so it's 'only' 14 hours to Vancouver. I had a horrible day on saturday where I could barely leave the couch from fatigue. Not great as my partner was running a marathon that day (which makes me feel even more useless!!) This too shall pass, this too shall pass, this too shall pass I thought I was over wishing my life away when I did my last IVF cycle. Life seems designed to turn us ladies into exhausted flab balls.
I also went out with 4 mates on sat night and the talk was just babies this and children that, meanwhile our one childless friend is going through her last ever IVF cycle. I felt so awful for her and was very happy to talk about other things when the opportunity arose but it's just going to get harder as more babies pop out and overwhelm people's lives. I wouldn't be able to stand it, she's a stronger person than me for listening to it all, I remember how I felt. I'd be screaming at everyone to stop whinging.
@Tahli yes that's what I put the high HCG down to. @JulieMalooley still scared me with all the twinnies talk though I have another scan tomorrow and still convinced they'll find another one in there. when is your first POAS day?
big hugs @Blossom74, this part of the process sucks completely!! One step at a time, you're definitely not out yet so don't give up. But I know how you feel as thats my usual thing too, the closer i get to D-day the more negative i feel. treat yourself to something yummy today for some TLC
The EDA site seems pretty great for people connecting with donors so it is a very real option and it probably just takes time being active in there and getting to know others and showing a bit of your personality so that others can get to know you. Ive found everyone to be super friendly and have connected with a few people which is nice as it makes it all feel like a community and that you're not alone in it all which is important.
you could always hold off testing til tomorrow if its only going to stress you out? Tomorrow is probably the day when its going to be the right result.
@Blossom74 I'm sorry sweetie, I think sometimes you do know, deep down, when it hasn't worked.
As for forging a connection with someone online to donate embryo's, well you have forged a connection with us in here, so I think you'll be fine doing it out there. If we were allowed to donate embryo's I'd give you some of ours, but by law in the US, because dh didn't pay for extra testing, we can't.
Don't despair, something will work out, when you least expect it xxxx
Glad you are settling in to EDA @tuxcat it is a bit weird to begin with until you start making genuine connections with other recipients, as you say. It was a good distraction as I came to the end of trying with my own eggs. It was also handy to talk to my counselor about coming to the decision to stop trying with my OE and also the doubts/questions I had about DE at the same time.
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