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  1. #31
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    Quote Originally Posted by gingermillie View Post
    Seriously what is with people. You know what - I am (in my own humble opinion lol) a genuinely nice down to earth person. I genuinely care about people. I am not materialistic. I don't care what car you drive, where you live, what you wear, if your nails are done, if you wear make-up, what job you have (if any), etc etc. I'm positive and helpful but not overbearing I have boundaries and value privacy. Im the kind of friend who will make you dinner and drop it off on your doorstep if you're sick (I did this today in fact). I don't ask or expect much from anyone. Except kindness and being genuine. Two things that are free yet so hard to find so I'm finding that increasingly I'm just letting people go from my life as I don't want to expend my nice energy on people that aren't nice. People that are hung up on appearances, dismissive, selfish and mean. It surprises me how many people are mean and I just wonder if they ever stop to think how they would feel to be treated the way they treat others.
    Sorry op to derail just some of these posts made me really sad.
    I feel I am the same. I have been at this workplace for 3 years and believed I had made genuine friends. It all came to a head when I was excluded from the staff photo at a river cruise for our belated Christmas party. I am currently looking for another job.

    I understand that people have different circles of friends and you cannot always be included in everything but a bit of acknowledgment or occasion invite would be nice. Workplace friendships is a whole new thread.

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    gingermillie  (07-03-2016)

  3. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by lese82 View Post
    I feel I am the same. I have been at this workplace for 3 years and believed I had made genuine friends. It all came to a head when I was excluded from the staff photo at a river cruise for our belated Christmas party. I am currently looking for another job.

    I understand that people have different circles of friends and you cannot always be included in everything but a bit of acknowledgment or occasion invite would be nice. Workplace friendships is a whole new thread.
    I am excluded from pretty much all work events that is organised by work people. Don't get invited to drinks. Don't get invited to lunches.

    Being married, having a kid and not wanting to join in horrible gossip or flirting means I get excluded. Work politics suck.

  4. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by twinklify View Post
    I am excluded from pretty much all work events that is organised by work people. Don't get invited to drinks. Don't get invited to lunches.

    Being married, having a kid and not wanting to join in horrible gossip or flirting means I get excluded. Work politics suck.
    It's not fair is it? Since having DD it's like I'm not on the radar of others anymore..

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    Little Miss Sunshine  (07-03-2016)

  6. #34
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    I tend not to dissect things.
    What would I do?

    I'd organise a huge party and not invite them.

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    amiracle4me  (07-03-2016),lese82  (07-03-2016),Wise Enough  (07-03-2016)

  8. #35
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs Tickle View Post
    I tend not to dissect things.
    What would I do?

    I'd organise a huge party and not invite them.
    Lol.. Love it.

  9. #36
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    Quote Originally Posted by lese82 View Post
    I have this happen to me all the time. Even at work when I "accidentally" walked into the dish room at the wrong time and the other girls there were organising dinner and a movie. I quickly got invited but declined 😕. I find now I don't have a circle of friends so to speak and just go out with hubby and the kids. I got over the rejection
    Why decline the invite? They probably now think you wouldn't want to attend social events with them and won't invite you again.

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  11. #37
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    Quote Originally Posted by babyno1onboard View Post
    Why decline the invite? They probably now think you wouldn't want to attend social events with them and won't invite you again.
    I declined because I was only invited because I walked in on the conversation and they felt they had to invite me and even then it was you can come if you want. I prefer to be asked because they would like to hang out as such not out of obligation.

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  13. #38
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    Default WWYD - excluded from 'friends' social event?

    Quote Originally Posted by lese82 View Post
    I declined because I was only invited because I walked in on the conversation and they felt they had to invite me and even then it was you can come if you want. I prefer to be asked because they would like to hang out as such not out of obligation.
    I know what you mean and understand your view.

    I'm just sad reading these posts... I often take up such invites anyway, then used the opportunity to get to know people better and make friends. Then I get invited because people want to hang out with me (I think!). Likewise, if people are discussing something they did recently and I wasn't invited I will say something like 'that sounds awesome, if there is a free spot / ticket next time I'd love to join you'. I find that often people don't invite someone because they hadn't thought that the person may be interested. Anyway, I don't want to start a debate, just provide some fuel for thought as this approach has helped me widen my friend circle, if it can help others that would be awesome

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  15. #39
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    I have this issue too. I have a small group of friends that basically all met each other through me. Coincidentally they all live within 5 minutes of each other whereas I lived 20 mins away. Constantly I would see fb posts of them all at the beach or at the park for a bbq or at each other's houses.
    I'm working on losing weight and walking a lot. Kept telling two of the girls to let me know when they were walking and I would meet them. Never heard from either of them yet they constantly checked in on fb out walking bush tracks and stuff.

    I slowly realised I wasn't a 'convenient' friend. Because I couldn't just drop everything and be where they were going in 5 minutes then they just didn't bother inviting me. Now I've moved 40 mins away one couple has stopped communicating with me all together. If I want to see any of the others I have to drive to them. There's no meeting half way or them coming here.

    People suck.

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    It hurts when you realise you are on the outer with people you thought were your friends. I've been there and it makes you question yourself and your value.

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