Honestly guys, just let her have a vent. It's no secret that her husband treats her like sh*t so I highly doubt this was a communication issue.
My husband would have helped regardless of what I said.
Op, I hope you are seriously putting the effort in place to leave in April, your children need to be out of this environment.
Last edited by HollyGolightly81; 02-03-2016 at 17:37.
I am just really troubled by her older kids seeing and hearing all this. Watching your mum be nearly crushed by a desk and hearing your dad swear at her is not healthy.
Maybe the OP should start an emotional health diary on here rather than threads so people can't comment but can offer support for specific situations through PMs?
ETA I probably should have tagged the OP. @RuffledPansy the emotional health area on here is a really useful place to vent. I don't read all the threads on here so don't know history and am sorry if what people say is upsetting because not everyone will know the backstory.
Last edited by Sonja; 02-03-2016 at 18:09.
See I get why you are upset. You shouldn't *have* to ask. If I got a desk that needed assembling my DH would offer to do it for me without even asking. Not bc he's a chauvinist, or bc he thinks I'm weak or stupid but bc that's what happens in a healthy relationship right? You help each other.
Obviously the problem here is that he is an abusive tool. But you keep setting yourself up emotionally by hoping that he is magically going to change and be a good husband. He is never ever going to be. When you let the hope go he is going to change, then maybe you may start to develop a plan to leave. As my husband says... you can't polish a turd.
What are you plans for April? Where will you stay? Do you have a plan to get your belongings out? I'm going to be honest, I'm worried what this is doing to your kids. This stuff scars and changes you forever, I speak from experience. If you don't have the strength to leave for yourself leave for them.
OP I feel sad for you that you're in such an unhealthy relationship. That sort of thing is NOT normal in a loving partnership. I don't know your story but I gather from a few other replies that you plan to leave? If so, it's probably for the best. You deserve so much better than that. You absolutely shouldn't have had to ask for help with the desk. Someone who loves you would've rushed to help you.
Hi op its a terrible situation. I hope you can use the the time to plan your exit, in terms of paperwork, finances, accommodation, safety plan.
Only read tue forst post and MM here so forst response is to tey and fix the problem.
Are you sure the desk is stuffed. If you want a second opinion post some pics. I'll be back in NSW in a couple of weeks or I have a network of woodworking enthusiasts actoss the country. May be able to point someone your way.
Sorry about the 'C' rap you are going thru
Well tonight I received a " Dear John " letter by my bedside table when I got home from work ..
What did it say? Are you ok?
Blah blah blah
I'm sorry I'm leaving ...we've had good times ...sorry to hurt you ...I can't do it anymore ....I love you ...but don't love you the same anymore...we had good times ...don't want contact for the next few days but will talk to you on the weekend..
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