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  1. #301
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    Look I'm not perfect I have never claimed to be in my life but people have their own thought on things that maybe different to others and they may not be right or wrong ...but I am just expressing how I am feeling right at this moment...

  2. #302
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    Look the longer you leave it, the worse it is going to get.

    You need to tell them sooner rather than later. Don't wait for him. By not telling them, you are lying to them by omission.

    FWIW my exdh left me. I was left to tell the kids as he was too chicken. It was not pleasant, but it was something that had to be done. I told them we both loved them very much but we could no longer live together as we made each other sad.

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  4. #303
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    I think that's sad and I'm sorry that you had to do that ...you are very brave ...

  5. #304
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    Like I said I'm not perfect. ..or just feel as though I'm left with everything and I have to pick up all of the pieces..

  6. #305
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    Yeah I understand that you have been left to pick up the pieces. He is an asshat of the highest order and has treated you and the kids appallingly . Think long term though. The kids will eventually work out what he is like and he will lose out long term. Your older kids already have worked out what he is like.

    We are all human. Noone is perfect. You can try to be a good enough parent for your kids though. Your kids need you to be strong at the moment. Easier said than done, but they do need you so very much.

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  8. #306
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    That's what my oldest son told me last night ...

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    Seek councelling or something because it seems that we are of little help to you. Get a referral to a psychologist through your GP and organise an appointment for you. My exhusband is a nice guy but seeking professional help during our seperation really helped as you still grieve for the relationship. I still go to councelling for different matters now, but you need to talk to someone who can offer you professional advice. I highly recommend it.

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  11. #308
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    Even if he is immature you need to be the adult. It sucks but adulting sucks most of the time.

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  13. #309
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    kiwimum890 is offline It won't happen overnight, but it will happen!
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    Default Need to get this off my chest

    Quote Originally Posted by RuffledPansy View Post
    I understand what you are saying I just feel like this house doesn't get a break from him and it really makes me sad that he won't tell them he has gone he is waiting for me to do it I'm sure ....but I'm not going to do his dirty work for him ...
    I think this is a good thing, this way you have the opportunity to explain it to your children in age appropriate way rather than getting upset and angry that he said this or didn't say that, so what if he is too chicken to do it himself I think your kids would appreciate hearing it from their Mum (the one who is with them, not the Dad who has decided to leave) this way you have the control over how it is explained to them...

    Hope that makes sense....

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  15. #310
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    Quote Originally Posted by kiwimum890 View Post
    I think this is a good thing, this way you have the opportunity to explain it to your children in age appropriate way rather than getting upset and angry that he said this or didn't say that, so what if he is too chicken to do it himself I think your kids would appreciate hearing it from their Mum (the one who is with them, not the Dad who has decided to leave) this way you have the control over how it is explained to them...

    Hope that makes sense....
    Yes I think I get what you mean ...


 

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