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  1. #101
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    Quote Originally Posted by RuffledPansy View Post
    He wants to take them for a week and I'm not allowed to know where he is living ...so I won't know we're the kids are when he has them ..
    This may hurt to hear but he lost his ability to ask that when he became an abusive husband and father.

    He has no right to ask that if you now so no - he is not able to take the kids.

  2. #102
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    Agreed. Do not let your kids go with their dad until you have something sorted with parenting plans. He's left, he has no right to them until you allow it, which I wouldn't do until you know where he is living. He has a right to privacy if he's in his own, but as soon as he takes his kids you MUST know where he is taking them. I think your next step should be to change the locks. I'm not liking the sound of where this is all going.

    Be strong, you can do this! You dare by need him and you and your kids will be better off without him.
    This is not actually true. He has equal rights to them. Especially while there are no orders in place.
    However it is often written into orders that addresses of where kids are staying are exchanged, so it's not an unreasonable request.

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  4. #103
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    Quote Originally Posted by CMF View Post
    This is not actually true. He has equal rights to them. Especially while there are no orders in place.
    However it is often written into orders that addresses of where kids are staying are exchanged, so it's not an unreasonable request.
    That's true & also presents the possibility that should you hand them over to him for a week he may decide not to give them back & because there are no legal parenting/custody orders in place he'll be well within his rights to do it.

    You'd have to go to court to get a recovery order to get them back!! Do not hand your kids over at this stage. He is not to be trusted!! If he wants to see them do it somewhere very public where he can be supervised, have less risk of taking them plus have plenty of witnesses should he try anything on!!!

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  6. #104
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    I think he's bluffing, again.

    Do you really think he'd cope for a whole week on his own with the kids?

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  8. #105
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    Quote Originally Posted by CMF View Post
    This is not actually true. He has equal rights to them. Especially while there are no orders in place.
    However it is often written into orders that addresses of where kids are staying are exchanged, so it's not an unreasonable request.
    True. And in many many other circumstances I would agree.

    But not knowing the address and the situation with the OP would mean that its probably not the best idea.

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  10. #106
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    Do not agree to give them to him for a week without parenting orders being in place. No way. He could take them and not give them back, and with him saying he's not telling you where he's living/where he'd be taking them. No.

    You need to get interim orders in place asap. Do whatever it takes to get to a womens community legal centre and get some legal advice about this, and about how to get orders in place. Do not agree to him just taking them without something legally enforceable that ensures you get them back.

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    Please don't agree to this if you can't know where he lives...why the secrecy ? What is he hiding.

  12. #108
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    Quote Originally Posted by ProudMumma34 View Post
    Please don't agree to this if you can't know where he lives...why the secrecy ? What is he hiding.
    I think it's all part of control and calling the shots on his part.

    OP if your kids wanted to go to a stay with a friend and refused to tell you where they were going would you let them go? No way. This is no different. He wants to see them, he can jump through your hoops for a change.

    Also, do you have internet at home? From memory you can make an 'intent to claim' on the Centrelink website if you have a CAN and then they will call you. I think you need to do something today to help you keep your focus, and this is something you can do. Or get a locksmith in. Just do something. Anything.

    I know you're sad and angry and scared, and in that state of mind it can feel easier to do nothing. It can feel impossible to act. But you've got this. You've got your excellent list from @SSecret Squirrel. Pick one thing and make a start.

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  14. #109
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    Quote Originally Posted by babyla View Post
    I think he's bluffing, again.

    Do you really think he'd cope for a whole week on his own with the kids?
    Realistically he would pick them at after school care so he would do ....pick up/shower/dinner/bed....
    They go to school ...he goes to work then same again he would have them Monday till Sunday on Sunday he would drop them back home to me ...
    I have never been without them that long ...

  15. #110
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    I think he has been planning all this for a while especially if he already has a new place to live. He left the note when he had everything organized and ready to go. That doesnt mean you can't leave on your own terms. If you haven't got onto family assistance yet, start trying tomorrow 10 mins before the call lines open if you can. Also Legal Aid can give family law advice over the phone. All the best OP.


 

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