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  1. #11
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    My is 80 % full. But a new person decline rate runs x 10 faster than someone I know for a while.

    I wish I could say a stranger has never hurt me. So while I am generally trusting it disappear in a puff of smoke very quickly

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  3. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia&Hannah View Post
    Exactly. The OP didn't specify in what situation trust was to be earned.

    Teachers/carers have a duty of care to their charges. We as citizens of the world have a duty of care to each other.
    I get where you're going with that but technically no we don't.

    if your kid falls over at day care and cuts their head open on the concrete and it can be established the staff at the centre were negligent, they've failed in their duty of care to your kid.

    if someone at the park asked me to keep an eye on their kid and the kid fell, I have no duty of care towards that child. I'm just a nobody.

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  5. #13
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    I would agree with the pp's. I'm not completely cynical, I don't think everyone I meet will rob/harm me.
    But yes, I also feel it needs to be earned if your going to be very close to someone.
    So I guess it also depends on the role a person plays in your life.

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  7. #14
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    Quote Originally Posted by turquoisecoast View Post
    I get where you're going with that but technically no we don't.

    if your kid falls over at day care and cuts their head open on the concrete and it can be established the staff at the centre were negligent, they've failed in their duty of care to your kid.

    if someone at the park asked me to keep an eye on their kid and the kid fell, I have no duty of care towards that child. I'm just a nobody.
    I'd disagree with you. I often look out for other kids in playgrounds/playareas. If I can see a kid doing something dangerous I stop them.

    But that's they way I was raised. Duty to each other, duty to country and duty to God.

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  9. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia&Hannah View Post
    I'd disagree with you. I often look out for other kids in playgrounds/playareas. If I can see a kid doing something dangerous I stop them.

    But that's they way I was raised. Duty to each other, duty to country and duty to God.
    yes as a decent human being I would do the same. I'm just saying that same established legal duty of care is not there. that's all.

    anyway I'm derailing the thread.

    as you all were.

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  11. #16
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    Default Sort of spinoff - is trust earned or assumed?

    These answers are really interesting :-)

    I have been thinking more about my OP. I guess I'm not thinking of trusting people 'to do' something that involves us - ie trust a childcare worker or a bank teller to do their job appropriately, just, trust that a stranger is a benevolent person with good intentions until otherwise proven, if that makes sense?

    For example:
    Seeing a man sitting in a park watching children play as a man sitting in a park watching children play or a potential dodgy paedophile?

    If someone walks towards you in a busy street do you clutch your bag closer to you or it wouldn't occur to you?

    Do you assume that people are who they claim to be online?

    That sort of thing. I know there are plenty of exceptions to any rule but where does your radar generally lie?

    For me, I give full trust but I do rely strongly on my intuition.

    ETA and I should say this is probably a self-defence mechanism. If I were second guessing people all the time my anxiety would go through the roof!

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    Adult to adult, i will generally assume trust and good intentions. I am a glass half full person. When it comes to my children, i show caution. I feel i have a good 'radar' and intuition. Trust needs to be earnt if you are having contact with my kids.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia&Hannah View Post
    I trust most people. No random person has ever hurt or upset me.

    I wouldn't leave my kids with other strangers but oh hang on.... I send my kids to school and daycare with the full expectation they will be OK.
    I'm the same. I tend to think the best as I've not really been given reason not to.

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    For example:
    Seeing a man sitting in a park watching children play as a man sitting in a park watching children play or a potential dodgy paedophile?

    Dad, uncle or grandfather. Or just a harmless man enjoying kids playing.


    If someone walks towards you in a busy street do you clutch your bag closer to you or it wouldn't occur to you?

    Wouldn't occur to me at all. I'd smile at them.

    Do you assume that people are who they claim to be online?

    Why wouldn't they be?


    I trust my intuition. And I'm rarely wrong. But once my trust is gone it ain't coming back.

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    Seeing a man sitting in a park watching children play as a man sitting in a park watching children play or a potential dodgy paedophile?
    - it depends. If it's a kids playground, there are no other 'single' adults around and he is watching the kids then yes I would probably have my guard up.


    If someone walks towards you in a busy street do you clutch your bag closer to you or it wouldn't occur to you?
    - totally depends on the person (make/female, appearance, what they appeared to be focused on).

    Do you assume that people are who they claim to be online?
    - sometimes yes and sometimes no. I usually have a pretty good radar for whether someone is being reasonably honest. It would take a lot before I would consider meeting someone I met online though (if at all).

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