I can't believe I'm getting these compliments. I don't feel deserving. I certainly don't feel strong or resourceful.
I can tell you what I've been feeling though: fed up!
Talked at length yesterday and again today. He wants to go. So I've said (just to keep the peace) okay, give it three months. This allows me to finish my course, it allows my other child to complete his kindy term (he loves it there and they love him) and it would give us time to save up some cash and to source a place to live etc. He says gee that's selfish. You can finish the course anywhere. TAFE is like national.
And I have to pause to take a deep breath.
Then he says he wants to move to south. As in two hours south of Adelaide. Because it has nice beaches.
There are no services there for the kids, I say.
Well how hard can it be...I'll drive them once a week to the therapist or whatever.
I am starting to think he's suffered a blow to the head in the last month and it's affected his intellect. You couldn't make this **** up.
So now he's whinging about which part of Adelaide he wants to move to.
Do I think he's depressed. Yes. Will he admit this? No. Will he do anything about it? No. But I'm taking this one day at a time. I'm trying to fit in a discussion period where we sit calmly and try to work through his dissatisfaction. True, I'm not happy either but only due to the disharmony this issue is causing. He can be very derogatory and I have to just dismiss that and not take anything personally. I definitely think he's a green grasser HillDweller!
HollyGolightly81, I do hate the house though. I have to be honest. I love its elevation and it's lovely little backyard, the neighbours are wonderful and I love the view from the kitchen window. But it has a few glaring maintenance issues that the agents are not addressing and no air-con. Dear god, no air-con and it's just about killed me. The humidity is beyond reason and I'm sweating like a porn start in a sauna.
And get this!, the former tenants' mail keeps coming here and I've just been putting return to sender on it and putting it in the post box when I do my mail. Better than throwing it out, right? So out of the blue he turns up last night with his missus and they inquire as to whether I've been getting any mail and I say yeah, ******s of it, been sending it back. I then get a mouthful because I didn't give it to the agent so that they could be informed! Lol. So here I am with baby in one arm, a spatula in the other, a teatowel over my shoulder and me looking like the Mata Hari of the Town Dump and I just start laughing. You have got to be kidding me right? You don't have the brains to do a redirection and you want me to collect your mail and deliver it to my agent? Haha. hahahahahaa... See those high stairs? I'd be making my way down them now before you get a helping hand. And she says to me, oh you're so rude.
That, my friends, is the attitude of half the town. The other half is quite nice.
Your responses have kept me balanced when really I should have been going postal by now. I realise how isolated and alone I am here.
Much love to you all