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  1. #1
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    Default Interview with expert on mother and infant sleep

    This article just popped up in my newsfeed and thought some would find it interesting, those of us who struggled with those sleepless nights and felt guilty for co-sleeping.

    http://m.huffpost.com/us/entry/james...n=au_australia
    Last edited by HollyGolightly81; 16-02-2016 at 01:27.

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    It is interesting, although not really unexpected... I think the trouble comes with trying to fit anthropology into the modern age and culture the WE live in. I think it probably goes without saying that a newborn sleeps best attached to its mother, breastfed, with the ability to have biphasic sleep...or "to rest when baby does". I think in an ideal world we would be doing just that. Unfortunately, for many, society doesn't allow it... not because of any tut-tutting but because of societal pressures such as work, and education ..and clocks, telling us we need to be somewhere at a particular time etc. We are just so busy now...The fear of applying an anthropological theory on infant sleep is that after 6/12mths or whatever mum has to go back to work, so she actually needs sleep to function and no longer has the luxury of naps, and the infant has to learn to sleep alone at daycare.... obviously not a situation that apply to everyone..but many..
    Just some random thoughts...

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  5. #3
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    Default Interview with expert on mother and infant sleep

    Quote Originally Posted by Kaybaby View Post
    It is interesting, although not really unexpected... I think the trouble comes with trying to fit anthropology into the modern age and culture the WE live in. I think it probably goes without saying that a newborn sleeps best attached to its mother, breastfed, with the ability to have biphasic sleep...or "to rest when baby does". I think in an ideal world we would be doing just that. Unfortunately, for many, society doesn't allow it... not because of any tut-tutting but because of societal pressures such as work, and education ..and clocks, telling us we need to be somewhere at a particular time etc. We are just so busy now...The fear of applying an anthropological theory on infant sleep is that after 6/12mths or whatever mum has to go back to work, so she actually needs sleep to function and no longer has the luxury of naps, and the infant has to learn to sleep alone at daycare.... obviously not a situation that apply to everyone..but many..
    Just some random thoughts...
    You make good points. But...I just thought some people who are currently struggling with sleep and the guilt that can come with feeling like you 'caved in' to co-sleeping would be interested in reading it. Of course we have other factors to consider, and I think he does a good job of also saying to just follow your instincts for your family and baby. It's just nice to read some articles telling you that following your gut isn't going to break your baby.

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    Thanks HG.

    I've always been a fan of Dr mckenna and Dr Sears. They advocate biological norm parenting.

    Plus they are "actual" doctors and specialists in their fields.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaybaby View Post
    It is interesting, although not really unexpected... I think the trouble comes with trying to fit anthropology into the modern age and culture the WE live in. I think it probably goes without saying that a newborn sleeps best attached to its mother, breastfed, with the ability to have biphasic sleep...or "to rest when baby does". I think in an ideal world we would be doing just that. Unfortunately, for many, society doesn't allow it... not because of any tut-tutting but because of societal pressures such as work, and education ..and clocks, telling us we need to be somewhere at a particular time etc. We are just so busy now...The fear of applying an anthropological theory on infant sleep is that after 6/12mths or whatever mum has to go back to work, so she actually needs sleep to function and no longer has the luxury of naps, and the infant has to learn to sleep alone at daycare.... obviously not a situation that apply to everyone..but many..
    Just some random thoughts...
    But for many people here in Australia Co sleeping is viewed by health professionals as a negative practice. Why do sleep schools (mainly funded by governments) advocate self soothing crap for babies.

    There are also substantial studies to show that bed sharing mums actually get more minutes of sleep than non bed sharing mums. Bedsharing isn't publicized nor talked about.

    I've heard so many parents say "I know its not the right thing but the baby sleeps with us". It IS the right thing. It IS the norm. Why be embarrassed about parenting the way that you were meant to????

    And that daycare issue - I found daycares pretty flexible with kids sleeping. I know my old one in Brisbane had a lovely lady who would sit in her rocker and rock the babies to sleep. Another one wore them in the carrier if they were upset. Most pushed babies around in prams to get bubs to nod off. My toddlers (who were fed to sleep at home) were cuddled by carers.

    I think we need to parenting the way our kids need to be parented vs shoving them into this stupid "7-7 self soothing" dream which is contrary to both biological and anthropological norms.

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    Great article. I don't think many in here would argue that co-sleeping isn't a great thing - if it's working for the family involved of course. It certainly isn't something that parents should be shamed about.

    I think Kaybay raises a great point about the difficulties of applying an anthropological theory in this modern day and age. While parents shouldn't be shamed for co-sleeping, likewise if a bub not sleeping well is leaving you in a distressed state, and you are facing modern challenges that our ancestors didn't (working outside the home, no support village) then there is no shame in using whatever tools and strategies are at your disposal to help bub sleep through - even if they go against the biological norm.

    Something being 'normal' doesn't necessarily make it bad or good - likewise something not being 'normal' or historically the norm doesn't necessarily make it bad or good. Our ancestors didn't have washing machines or I-phones but I'm sure as hell not going to give mine up.

    I am curious as to whether the doctors wife worked outside the home at all and whether she had a support network around her. Not that it would invalidate the Doctors studies - however it *may* (or may not!) provide a possible explanation into the lack of mention of modern pressures in the article. Genuinely curious.

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    My kinda thread with my kinda people.

    Pre baby I was like WTF is this cosleeping business. Crazytown!

    Had baby who would not sleep unless he was near mum and dad (bassinet did not suffice) and I learnt that cosleepung5is safe and in my case was needed for my DS and also me.

    I thought it was so amazing that my DH who has been so supportive of cosleeping (despite noone in our family/friends circle doing it) saw a cosleeping bed thing in the shops and said 'thats so cool! We should get that of we need to later'.

    Also my daycare was fab with DS who did not sleep in a cot. He slept in a rocker, or a mattress on the floor near everyone. As a toddler the mats on floors suit him perfectly. And yes, he sleeps so much better now.

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    Default Interview with expert on mother and infant sleep

    Can I just add, I really don't want this to turn into a debate where either 'side' feels they need to defend themselves. I chose to post it in the cosleeping section because I know there are a few of us in the past and currently who have dealt with the feelings like we are doing something wrong if we end up cosleeping. I wasn't meaning this as a jab to people who do not cosleep or want to sleep train, I think we all know I'm a pretty middle ground between the two, I was posting it as a little encouragement to those of us in the midst of these feelings and needing some reassurance that it's ok if it's what we feel we need to do.

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    Default Interview with expert on mother and infant sleep

    Quote Originally Posted by HollyGolightly81 View Post
    Can I just add, I really don't want this to turn into a debate where either 'side' feels they need to defend themselves. I chose to post it in the cosleeping section because I know there are a few of us in the past and currently who have dealt with the feelings like we are doing something wrong if we end up cosleeping. I wasn't meaning this as a jab to people who do not cosleep or want to sleep train, I think we all know I'm a pretty middle ground between the two, I was posting it as a little encouragement to those of us in the midst of these feelings and needing some reassurance that it's ok if it's what we feel we need to do.
    Good point. I don't doubt your intentions are genuine.

    I think it's important though to build oneself up via positive thinking and not outward judgement or negativity of others.
    Positive thinking creates happiness. Negativity and judgement creates more negativity and leads to unhappiness. There are lots of positives about co-sleeping to focus on.

    I think this article is a great start. The anthropological angle is very interesting.

    I don't co-sleep (doesn't suit me) however hats off to those who do and for whom it works. Enjoy the cuddles while the kids are young
    Last edited by VicPark; 16-02-2016 at 07:57.

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    interesting article, thank you for sharing.


 

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