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  1. #1
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    Default When did others announce their pregnancy following a stillbirth?

    Hi ladies,

    Just wondering at what gestation others chose to announce their pregnancy following a stillbirth. We lost our daughter at 38+2 in 2014 and will be 12 weeks along on Wednesday. I know generally people will announce after a positive 12 week scan as the risk of losing bub drops dramatically, but what did you do when you knew 12 weeks was no longer some magical safe point?

    Initially I had planned on waiting until 20ish weeks, but this is bub #3 and I hadn't lost any weight from my previous pregnancy so I am already quite visibly showing. It is so obvious in fact that my father asked me on the weekend whether I was pregnant and choosing not to share the news yet.

    I have only told one person, as has DP and we both agreed that our son deserves to hear the news next before anyone else. I really don't want to get his hopes up again only to have to tell him we can't bring his baby home.

    The other dilemma is that my parents are heading overseas and will not be back until a couple of weeks after bub will be evicted, I know that they will want to be here when little one arrives and so realise they may want to change their booking as soon as possible.

    I'm starting to realise I may have to let people know sooner rather than later, so interested to hear how others decided when the right time was to share their news.

  2. #2
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    Understandable that you are hesitant to announce your news. For the supportive aspect of things, I would tell ones close to you like your parents, they would probably want to change their travel dates around a bit.
    With my first 2 I announced at 12weeks with my last 2 I only announced when it become really obviously so 16weeks.

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    Tainted  (16-02-2016)

  4. #3
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    Default When did others announce their pregnancy following a stillbirth?

    We varied between 12 and 20 weeks for both rainbow pregnancies. A few close people knew earlier because I get so sick but close family and friends was around 12-14 weeks and then didn't do a Facebook 'announcement' telling everyone else until 20 weeks. I've found that most of the time I find it hard to cope with how excited everyone is, since my anxiety makes me not, so it is much harder to want to talk about it so I kind of avoid the topic for as long and as much as possible.

    Eta: I should add that we are currently living overseas from both sides of friends and family so Facebook is just the easiest way for me to do it without having to deal with everyone individually.
    Last edited by HollyGolightly81; 16-02-2016 at 17:39.

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    Tainted  (16-02-2016)

  6. #4
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    I told my mum, dad, mil and fil and my support group at 4 weeks. Everyone else on our families found out at 12 weeks. We chose not to do a Facebook announcement until he was born.

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    Tainted  (16-02-2016)

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    I lost my son recently too, born at 30 weeks but died 8 days old from a virus he caught after he was born.

    I had two miscarriages first up so both my living sons pregnancy and my recent pregnancy we didn't announce until 16 weeks. However, I've decided if we get a next time it will only be on an as needs basis. Immediate families and any close friends that we see in person. I'm usually showing by 10 weeks so it's hard to hide but there will not be anything on the Internet etc until I have the baby safe and home

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    Tainted  (16-02-2016)

  10. #6
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    Thanks for the replies ladies. In an ideal world it would be nice to hide away until (hopefully) bub is safely here but unfortunately it looks like the choice will be somewhat out of our hands.


 

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