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  1. #1
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    Default Is your 7 year old DD an easy child?

    Mine doesn't seem to be... i'm at my wits end. Today was the last straw. She has just started gymnastics and i was watching whilst she was dilly-dallying on the floor and then she was told firmly to stay in routine.. no yelling at her nothing...but the story she gave me was she was yelled at, and then proclaimed that she's not good at anything and she's a nobody

    She's not a confident girl but not totally meek. she has plenty of friends at school and does well during the year. BUT to her, if she can't be top at something, there are tears, the silly ''im nothing'' talk, her confidence goes down the drain.. i don't know WHY she's so competitive, when no one else is.. I try giving her confidence, plenty of it, i tell her no matter what i am proud of her and her efforts but she gives up things in a instant with ''i can't do this'' attitude.. and then starts crying bitter tears..we seem to be going in circles with this..

    We do ALOT of things together, in fact i spend most of my attention on her and my other kids don't get as much, but according to DD, she wishes she was an only child, gets resentful and bitter when i pay the other kids attention and lately even my husband..

    how do i deal with this, I am really stumped.

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    My 11 and 9yo DD's do the same thing when I have a go about their behaviour or something they shouldn't have done. They are in general good kids, but they come out with the "I'm not good enough", "I'm dumb" , "You don't love me" lines as they run to their rooms. It's heart wrenching, and I tell them all the time how smart, or clever they are. They both have a good confidence, and are generally happy kids. I guess it is my fault as they have probably hear me when my DP and I are fighting, but we don't fight as much as we used to, as I went to counselling to improve my self esteem.

    I don't have much advice just that I can relate.

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    GlitterFarts  (09-02-2016)

  4. #3
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    7yo girls are emo. So so emo.

    I've no magic solution, just sympathy. We're muddling our way through.

    I think in many ways they revert to something akin to toddlerdom. New emotions and feelings and frustrations they just can't tame. So I'm trying to approach it in a similar - yet more age appropriate - way to when she was 2 or 3. Less about being rational and more about cuddling and acknowledging overwhelming feelings.

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    gingermillie  (08-02-2016),GlitterFarts  (09-02-2016),Mod-biscotti  (08-02-2016),VicPark  (08-02-2016)

  6. #4
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    I really am at a loss with how to handle it.

  7. #5
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    Honestly, my just-turned-8yo DD is more work than my middle-of-the-terrible-twos DS!

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    GlitterFarts  (09-02-2016)

  9. #6
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    Yep. Seven year olds are the new 14 I think!

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    GlitterFarts  (09-02-2016)

  11. #7
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    Good to hear I'm not alone! My 7yr old dd has been high maintenance lately, she can get so worked up and emotional, also jealous. I feel like she's been showing a bit of a teenager attitude too I don't know if she needs more sleep, needs more hugs or it's just a phase!

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    GlitterFarts  (09-02-2016)

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    I think its normal for many kids to feel emotions very deeply and they struggle to control them.... I struggle to control my emotions at times and I'm supposed to be a grown up.

    My two older kids get really down on themselves. They are told every day how fantastic I think they are so its not from lack of encouragement or praise.
    We picked a way to manage those moments and its been getting so much better. While I support their emotions I also won't tolerate any disrespectful behaviour. So I will often say, I understand how your feeling. I sometimes feel sad when I can't do something too. But I will not have you crying like that, so I will count to five and I want you to take some big breaths and calm down so we can talk about this. If you don't I will put you in your (room, a quite spot, the car etc) until you have calmed down and we talk about it properly.

    Now I get to two and my DD has stopped crying and we sort it out. My DS is managed a bit differently as he experiences OE's.

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    GlitterFarts  (09-02-2016)

  15. #9
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    thank goodness im not alone, i was beginning to think it's totally abnormal.


 

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