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  1. #1
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    Default Bedtimes when kids are differnt ages?

    I have an almost 8 year old DD , DS1 - 6 and DS2 - 2.5y.
    The trouble I am having is that I am finding it very hard ( impossible) to get the 2.5 y old into bed before the other two. Often DH is not here at bedtime and by the time homework, dinner, bath, books, songs etc are done I just can't find the time to lay with DS2 for the half hour it takes him to fall asleep without the other two ending up staying up too late. So- at the moment they are all in bed by 8pm but not really asleep for another 30 mins which is far too late for a 2 y old who is up before 6am.
    At the moment the older two are in a room and DS2 in ours as we are renovating but that will change to the two boys together and DD on her own.
    I just can't work out how to get around this problem without putting the lot of them too bed by 7pm which just won't work :/
    What happens in other peoples houses???

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    Our bedtime is hell at the moment as the kids are wound up from starting back at school. Here's what it looks like on a good night:

    DD3 (2 yo) asleep by 7
    DS (4 yo) asleep by 730

    DH settles dd3 and I settle DS. DD2 (6 yo) has last iPad while DS is going to sleep. I then read stories to DD2 and she's asleep by 8. DD1 is 10 and doesn't go to sleep til 9. She has iPad then half an hour of reading from 815.

    Tonight was a shocker as the youngest 2 both fell asleep in the car on way home from school and DD2 has severe anxiety from being back at school. So DH and I were stretched and over it. DD3 asleep around 745 (way too late for her) and DS not until closer to 8. Also too late for him. DD2 wasn't asleep til 9. Very wound up tonight. DH went to bed at 915.

    So not the most exciting nights here.

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    When my kids were a little bit younger, they used to all dinner, bath etc at the same time 5-30 til 6.30. Then the youngest to bed at 7pm (story, drink, patting etc), next one at 7.30 and oldest at 8pm... I was doing it solo so the older two watched TV quietly while I put the little one to bed. My oldest two used to share a room but I had to stagger bedtimes or they would mess around and not sleep.

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    Can you not spend half hour putting the 2yo to bed at 7/7.30 whole the older ones watch TV, read etc. Then put the older two to bed at the same time at 7.30/8? (At age 8 and 6 my kids went to bed at 7.30)

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    I have a 6 and nearly 4yo and they both go to bed at 7:30.

    When my youngest was about 2.5, I needed to lie with her too. Drove me nuts if DH was away for work as it meant DS was in bed late. Can you try to cut the time they need you down? I had to with mine. It was taking 30-45 minutes and I just couldn't do it anymore. I tried to cut it down but wasn't successful so ended up just having a very rough few nights where we cuddled, I left, she cried, I went in, cuddles, left, repeat. It was hard, but it had to be done for my sanity.

    Otherwise, just split the difference. 7 is too early, 8 is too late, so aim for 7:30 with them all in bed. Say good night to the eldest 2 and then put your little one down.

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    while they were small, before starting school, everyone had a bedtime of 7.30. if they were quietly reading in bed I would leave the lights on for a few minutes. actually even after they started school bedtime stayed at about 7.3o for many years. of course there were times when it was a bit of a different story, but for the most part that was the rule. I remember we had an exchange student who was doing year 11, so we let his stay up later, and the kids complained,. but I showed them, he was still up because he was doing homework. if they wanted to get their school books out and sit at the table and do school work they could stay up too. there was no argument after that. marie.


 

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