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  1. #111
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    Default Not sleeping and not coping- help

    Ahh, sleep training..... The polite way of mentioning CONTROLLED CRYING (there I said it, the elephant in the room). I'm always very reluctant to mention it here as it's unpopular with many on bubhub which I completely respect

    I followed the sleepeasy solution (a wonderful reassuring book) with dd1. It was basically a supportive how to guide and a plan of attack for doing controlled crying.

    Look, it worked for dd1- it reduced her wake ups from 8+ to 1-2 a night (she never consistently slept through until I completely weaned her at 2). She became a dream to put to bed and napped like a champ. And she was so much happier (and so was I) as a result.

    So I will have no hesitation "sleep training" again when dd2 is around 6 months- she is very tiny so I'm reluctant to (gently) wean her off night feeds until I'm confident it'll work. I found this guide gentle as you wean them similar to dr jay Gordon's methods.

    But as I said, it's not a popular option here- I used to be against sleep training until dd1 broke me and I saw the positive results first hand.

    Eta: dd1 still had bad nights/phases of not sleeping when teething, hitting a milestone or sick. Completely normal. But it just meant she had the ability to self soothe when she just wanted to sleep.
    Last edited by Little Miss Sunshine; 18-02-2016 at 10:20.

  2. #112
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Miss Sunshine View Post
    Ahh, sleep training..... The polite way of mentioning CONTROLLED CRYING (there I said it, the elephant in the room). I'm always very reluctant to mention it here as it's unpopular with many on bubhub which I completely respect

    I followed the sleepeasy solution (a wonderful reassuring book) with dd1. It was basically a supportive how to guide and a plan of attack for doing controlled crying.

    Look, it worked for dd1- it reduced her wake ups from 8+ to 1-2 a night (she never consistently slept through until I completely weaned her at 2). She became a dream to put to bed and napped like a champ. And she was so much happier (and so was I) as a result.

    So I will have no hesitation "sleep training" again when dd2 is around 6 months- she is very tiny so I'm reluctant to take away her night feeds until I'm confident it'll work.

    But as I said, it's not a popular option here- I used to be against sleep training until dd1 broke me and I saw the positive results first hand.
    Yep we used controlled crying and honestly for ds1 it did work like magic. Waking every 20 mins or so all night long to sleeping 7-7 within 3 days (honestly!). I was initially still doing a dream feed at about 1 am for another week but then stopped and there was no looking back. Since 6 months old until very recently I could put him to bed anywhere with no night wakings at all. So of course I assumed that was the easy solution! And it was never that hard, he cried for max 20 mins before going to sleep so I never felt like an awful parent.
    Ds2 was a totally different story! He would get hysterical very quickly and at first was taking 1.5-2 hours to sleep (I know anti sleep trainers will be inhaling breath sharply at that!) but we felt we had to persevere as it would be cruel to do it for a few days the stop. So we stuck it out and things improved a lot and we were at the stage where I was doing a dream feed at about 12 then he was waking for a feed about 4am and up at about 6. This carried on for about a week then I went to Perth for a couple if weeks and everything went out the window! I've been back 3 weeks now and each night is different. Last night it was wakings at 9.30, 11, then a feed at midnight, another feed at 3am then up at 6am so not a bad night. But I would still love more than 2-3 hours sleep in one go!!

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  4. #113
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    Default Not sleeping and not coping- help

    Oh course, I'm hoping I won't have to do sleep training, if I'm managing and she's sleeping ok (im not expecting 10-12 hours straight, just not multiple wake ups) I'll let it slide

    No one ever goes yay! Let's leave our babies to cry!!! But sometimes you just gotta do what works for you and bubs and ignore what everyone else is thinking.

    Eta: same with co-sleeping, not leaving them to cry, whatever works to get you through
    Last edited by Little Miss Sunshine; 18-02-2016 at 10:45.

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  6. #114
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    Hey don't feel bad about calling it what it is! I'm not up to date with the ins and outs of the technique but if it works for your family then I'm good with that! Goodness knows I've fallen into co-sleeping and it's the bloody pits and its touted as the bees knees in Internet land LOL

    I thought the husband was due home today and have just spoken with him and found out it is today but he won't land until 7pm *cries*

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  8. #115
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    Default Not sleeping and not coping- help

    Mrs, he may be overtired at bedtime and that's why he's harder to settle? Have you tried bringing it forward a bit? I leant my book to somebody so don't have the exact times but I found following a guideline of what was the average max time for him to last awake at that age helped heaps, I think at that young it's 90 mins?

    And I don't think sleep training is only about controlled crying or crying it out, I have a few books that don't use either method ☺️. It's more about using some sort of method to try and change how your baby sleeps, and there are many different books and methods and sites to suit different parenting styles.
    Last edited by HollyGolightly81; 18-02-2016 at 17:21.

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  10. #116
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    Default Not sleeping and not coping- help

    Quote Originally Posted by HollyGolightly81 View Post

    And I don't think sleep training is only about controlled crying or crying it out, I have a few books that don't use either method ☺️. It's more about using some sort of method to try and change how your baby sleeps, and there are many different books and methods and sites to suit different parenting styles.
    I agree there are many other methods, but I was aware that nh2489 and I have both used cc so that's what we were referring to.

    I have wayyyy too many sleep books, yet still had crap sleepers lol

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  12. #117
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    Quote Originally Posted by Little Miss Sunshine View Post
    I agree there are many other methods, but I was aware that nh2489 and I have both used cc so that's what we were referring to.

    I have wayyyy too many sleep books, yet still had crap sleepers lol
    Me too! Between being a nanny, so having copies of whatever the mom I worked for was using and then buying willy nilly when I was in the depths of despair with DS, I have a library! I've been telling myself I'm only going to stick with my one preferred book from DS' days for this baby but the other day a mom in my neighborhood Facebook site was giving away one of the Baby Whisperer books and I thought 'oh might as well grab it...' And so it begins 😳

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  14. #118
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    I've got to get me some books LOL

    i attempted a 'not overtired' bedtime tonight by tricking him into a power nap in the carrier at 4.45, got him up into bed bang on time and he initially sounded like he was going to settle (he behaved the same way he does during the day, calm as I wrapped him and out him in the cot) then BAM!! All hell broke loose and he was worked up in a state in the two minutes it took me to get back up the stairs to his room. Even the dummy didn't help that much. I have no idea why he can do it during the day but not the night?? Any ideas?

    Sorry for for the thread hijack with my issues!

  15. #119
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    Why do our children test us so much and not fit into a sleep book guide/theory. Just one. Any one. At least we can follow a guide. Not just have kids/babies that do whatever and don't fit anywhere because they keep changing lol.

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    Quote Originally Posted by twinklify View Post
    Why do our children test us so much and not fit into a sleep book guide/theory. Just one. Any one. At least we can follow a guide. Not just have kids/babies that do whatever and don't fit anywhere because they keep changing lol.
    Cos last time I checked babies don't actually read books nor do they author them

    It kinda makes life more interesting doesn't it? When they surprise you with a curve ball?

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