I understand. ...I do know that when this comes out he will walk away himself and I will blamed because I was a sneak. ..I am a little scared ...I want my oldest son to be home when this all comes out ...
I confront my dh from time to time with info I've obtained "illegally". his reaction? unimpressed but he takes the time to understand why I've done it and we talk about it. and that's usually over something innocent. if he booked a trip without telling me, I'd seriously tear him a new one and change the locks on the house.
You know he has booked a holiday on his 'own' with shifty ulterior motives and you have the proof. Why do need him to actually go? The intent is there, that's all that should matter. If he doesn't go bc he can't afford it or some other reason not involving him getting a conscience will you stay bc he didn't actually go?
I think sometimes when we are in the midst of a situation our perspective is clouded. I think you are desperately trying to find reasons to stay. IF he goes on the holiday then you'll leave.
Do you have a plan in place to leave when he finds out or Are you going to let him just go on his trip and leave while he is gone?
I heard the song Brave today and I thought of you and the situation you are facing. There are people out there that can help you. He doesnt need to have all the control.
I can understand why it is hard for you to walk away.
Hi OP i agree please do not have your children present, especially if you are going to confront your DH about the trip. Dont put your kids in the firing line. Keep them out of it. I would encourage you to sort out your paperwork, finances as best you can, find a safe place, and walk out. The trip doesnt matter.
I don't have paperwork. ..
I know in the past we have rang travel agents in the past and made inquires etc etc ...and not gone through with it just left it as a inquire...
If I bring it up know I know he will through it in my face and say it was JUST an inquire and then it will be my fault ...I want it all to be solely some thing that he has inquired ...booked and gone on by himself then he can't lie about it ....it will be what he did ...what he organised and he won't be able to deny it ....it have the proof that he has put in for annual leave and it has been approved. . I have a photo of that documentation. ..
Let him go on his holiday and take this as the final proof you need and pack up as much as you can while he is away
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