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  1. #41
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    Haven't read all the way through but the way your going in a couple months you'll I'm sure you'll have an entourage

    We've moved internationally a few times, I find that through any type activities/groups where the kids are involved is always the easiest. And never decline an invitation, if the time doesn't suit you grab their details and reschedule asap.

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    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (16-01-2016)

  3. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by Marchbundle View Post
    Oh dear, I was a defence spouse a long time ago. I found defence playgroups painful and mums were a lot more clickier. I don't have any girlfriends where I live, and I have gotten to the point where I can't be bothered. Have been at our new location for about 3 or 4 months, and haven't really made friends with anyone. One mum asked me for my number and I gave it to her, but haven't done anything about it. I have moved that many times as a kid then as an adult, it gets exhausting making friends. I have girlfriends on facebook who live distances away, and I have chats with them online occasionally, but outside my kids and my DP, I am not overly concerned...I am expecting my 3rd bub, my DP's first so when this baby is born, I might get out and go to a playgroup or something...Good luck on finding some friends.
    ditto on the lots of contact with people I'm close to but it's via social media/email/text. I don't feel isolated or lonely. I guess that's the difference. I get scared people will look at my life and think wow, she must get really lonely. but I don't. I'm happy.

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    Marchbundle  (16-01-2016)

  5. #43
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    Quote Originally Posted by turquoisecoast View Post
    ditto on the lots of contact with people I'm close to but it's via social media/email/text. I don't feel isolated or lonely. I guess that's the difference. I get scared people will look at my life and think wow, she must get really lonely. but I don't. I'm happy.
    I was like that too pre Kids as I was working and had that human adult interaction during the day. Now that its my 3rd round of maternity leave I know how isolating it can be just you/kids/four walls/housework.

    Plus I find that when kids get grumpy or crochety the best antidote is a playdate. In brissie my mums group was phenomenal. I'd post on our fb page that my kids were being feral or I was exhausted and someone would say come over for a play or play/stay for dinner. In fact my whole pregnancy last year another mum used to have me and my brood over almost once a week for either dinner or lunch so I'd get a break from my cooking.

    We would mind each others kids if we had doctors appts, or needed to grocery shop or just needed some down time.

    The best thing was that I met them off bub hub. It started as 4 of us from here then we added on other mums we met at library, childcare or even just someone we used to see weekly at the cafe. Now it's a group of 20 mums and I adore them.

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    turquoisecoast  (16-01-2016)

  7. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia&Hannah View Post
    I was like that too pre Kids as I was working and had that human adult interaction during the day. Now that its my 3rd round of maternity leave I know how isolating it can be just you/kids/four walls/housework.

    Plus I find that when kids get grumpy or crochety the best antidote is a playdate. In brissie my mums group was phenomenal. I'd post on our fb page that my kids were being feral or I was exhausted and someone would say come over for a play or play/stay for dinner. In fact my whole pregnancy last year another mum used to have me and my brood over almost once a week for either dinner or lunch so I'd get a break from my cooking.

    We would mind each others kids if we had doctors appts, or needed to grocery shop or just needed some down time.

    The best thing was that I met them off bub hub. It started as 4 of us from here then we added on other mums we met at library, childcare or even just someone we used to see weekly at the cafe. Now it's a group of 20 mums and I adore them.
    yeah the not working/being on mat leave aspect would be rough in terms of no/very little adult contact.

    are there many/any Canberra bub hub mums you could meet up with?

  8. #45
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    Got 3 playdates booked in the next two weeks and waiting for another to reply back

    These poor women will have me jabbering away hahahaha.

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  10. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia&Hannah View Post
    Got 3 playdates booked in the next two weeks and waiting for another to reply back

    These poor women will have me jabbering away hahahaha.
    I hope these go well, personally I've found the defence playgroups not overly fantastic. They've been fairly unstructured and clicky. The best defence friends I've made in my current location have been dhs friends partners. They are often the most likeminded especially if dh has chosen to associate with them outside of work.

    As for other things church playgroups are awesome, I know you're on Mat leave but going to work really helped me and I don't use Childcare for my kids, defence now have a family friendly work thing in place which means if you have a regular shift outside of work hours and your DH is away he can apply for blanket permission to come back so you can work (something to think about when you go back to work).

    The first month relocating is easy, you're busy unpacking and looking around at your new place. Then the second month things get quiet and the days are long. What about neighbours? Or just the local park? I admit I often use my DDs interactions to start a conversation at the park. I've also found its sometimes not the initial person I meet up with that become friends but their friends from further meet ups.

    I wouldn't concentrate on the fact that you and others are going to be posted out in X number of years. Who knows maybe at your next posting you will be together anyway! I made a fantastic friend this posting who surprisingly was also in our last location and she has moved now to where we will probably be in our next posting.

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    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (16-01-2016)

  12. #47
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    Quote Originally Posted by turquoisecoast View Post
    Perth is extremely cliquey in that try hard, pretentious way. all the "perthonalities" and the sad hangers on who aspire to be like them.

    it's definitely an aspect of Perth I do not miss!! and I find myself cringing when I come to visit and see it in action.

    Perth would be fricken amazing if it lost that chip on its shoulder. ditto for all the bars/establishments that cater for this demographic.

    ok rant over. sorry to derail your thread OP!
    I have no idea what you are on about. I have lived here all my life and have never seen what you are describing. I am certaintly not pretentious nor are any of my friends. This is such a wierd post.

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    ArthurDent  (16-01-2016)

  14. #48
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia&Hannah View Post
    Got 3 playdates booked in the next two weeks and waiting for another to reply back

    These poor women will have me jabbering away hahahaha.
    I look forward to meeting you! And I'll be the one jabbering away hahaha!

    I totally understand the feeling of loneliness here in canberra. I had a mach nurse mums group with ds but we don't catch up or interact much at all anymore. Most of the mums were defense spouses and just seemed as though they weren't really interested in making much of a connection. After living in adelaide where everyone is so friendly I've struggled in canberra where it is very cliquey.

    Sent from my GT-I9507 using The Bub Hub mobile app

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    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (16-01-2016)

  16. #49
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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia&Hannah View Post
    Got 3 playdates booked in the next two weeks and waiting for another to reply back

    These poor women will have me jabbering away hahahaha.

    Thats good about your playdates. I like a good gasbag like every other mum, but to be honest, I really have to be in the mood lol.

  17. #50
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    Lol. I'm a chatterbox. I don't need to be in the mood. I need to be breathing.

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