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  1. #211
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    @lozza, for us it was the opposite. The anonymity was the thing we liked about the overseas process. I might be selfish, but I don't want the donor involved in my child's life. I'm his mother from the first moment and that's it. The only thing that concerns me is that I don't have a full medical history of the donor and her family. But sometimes we don't know our own family medical problems. We took a chance and we knew the consequences from the beginning. But this is my personal opinion. Good luck with your decision.

  2. #212
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    Opposite for us as well, and we had the added problem of own egg/sperm children thrown into the mix, and there was no way that I wanted these children to feel any different to the others, nor did I want the others to treat these ones any different, I only think it becomes more of a problem if your in the "telling" the child camp, it's no different to a closed adoption either I would imagine, as I'm sure you wouldn't get full family medical history unless it was an open adoption. Also I can't remember where I read it, but I'm sure there is a Czech law that states if the child/ren develop a serious illness you can go back to the clinic and request more I depth medical history of the donor and they have to give it to you,I'm positive I read that last wk Anyhow I think you should take a read up about epigenetics @lozza, and you will realise that the baby that results even from double donation will have some of your DNA and traits so th baby will be yours, as far as I was concerned as soon as those eggs were collected, they then became mine I was amazed about how protective I got when I got told how many eggs were collected and how many were fertilised, right from then, they were my babies

  3. #213
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    I am the same as the other girls for me it was because I didn't know the person. I looked on donation sites and let me tell you people wanted to be involved so much in your life that I was like ah NOPE!!

    I am planning to tell if we are lucky enough to have a baby from as young as you can.

    I work in child protection and biology does not mean anything at times. The genes etc that get turned on are influenced by the environment and they will be trying to challenge you cause they want your money to stay here sorry I am a psych too but that is up to that person.

    And @Stacey you are right Czech law does state that you will get more information if serious medical history. Children get identity issues when they find out later not if you start that conversation (basic one) from a young age. They will understand kids are resilient.

    Anyway that's my two cents worth. hmmm

    now this Zolodex stuff says in your tummy but Anna says bum any thoughts???

  4. #214
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    @Tegs do it in ya bum, the fleshy part at the top around the side I can't wait to hear if you have any side effects lol
    its a very personal decision about wether to tell or not, there are no rights or wrongs I believe and yes children can be understanding and very resilient but they can also be quite nasty and narrow minded no matter how they're brought up, but as I said each to their own
    Last edited by stacey10; 29-03-2016 at 06:41.

  5. #215
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    Thanks for all your comments ladies and you are right in what you say. For me doing 12yrs of foster care I have it drummed into me that bio is way more important than pretty much anyone. As carers we are not even considered to be family. I long for the day when I don't have to check with someone else and ask permission about how to parent my children. I also have to consider someone else and bio parents will always be in my life and my 2 boys (that hopefully we will have forever) will never really be "mine". So I agree this will be nice to not have someone wanting information, photos and visits all the time. Maybe its selfish I don't know and really at this point I don't care. All the crap we have been through to get to this point if I am blessed to have a baby through this process I will take the consequences of those decisions what ever they are. I just wish I had the money now and could get over there next week!! But I have to wait it out I really want to go before my 43rd birthday but I just don't know if I will be able to.

  6. #216
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    Hi everyone

    hope you have all had a great Easter.

    lozza I am the same as the others. We looked here first and everyone wanted to be part of your life. We did not want that so we preferred the anonymity. Re knowing bio parents, my parents are divorced and we have been very fortunate growing up with a fantastic step dad, he is my Dad in my view, not my bio father. I call him Dad and my bio father I call father. My Dad was the one at my netball games, every band concert, when I needed something, supported me through my childhood and now. Yes, I do know who my father is but I don't have much contact with him. So for me the bio is not important it is who is there when you are growing up.

    no test results yet. I only received the referrals from my ob for the ones for Zlin last week so I now need to go get all the tests done. I am going to stagger the blood tests so I don't have to have too much taken at once. Lol

    deb

  7. #217
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    the joys of living in a small town went to the drs surgery the dr hasn't done Zolodex before so asks the other dr. Nope him neither. Call the 3rd dr at the hospital yeap he has and can. I get sent next door to hospital for injection well I have to register to go to the hospital OMFG hmmmmm Anyway bum jab done

    it's getting real now!!!!

  8. #218
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    Woo hoo @Tegs, here we go !!!!! Small town here as well but luckily I just get my drs nurse to do it I've got 2 wks before mine and I turn into a dragon hehehe

  9. #219
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    um dragon lady what's that about @Stacey lol

    I hope not we have so much going on argh!!!!

  10. #220
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    um dragon lady what's that about @Stacey lol

    I hope not we have so much going on argh!!!!


 

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