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  1. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by misho View Post

    I will never forget how I felt, all 3 kids in tow, with mastitis, searching for a Dr who would see me (and then sitting in a waiting room for over an hour) plus then having to walk to the chemist to get my meds, with a temp of 40... DH was sitting nice & comfy at work, and to this day does not realise how much I needed him that day. A mum, a sister or a friend would have helped to deal with that then.
    Why the heck didn't your DH take leave from work if you were that sick? Did you flat out tell him how much you needed him?

  2. #22
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    I couldn't cope as a parent without it.

    I really feel for you The advice I want to give (though I know it's probably utterly impractical) is that life is too short to spend being miserable, something needs to change so why not pack up and move your family back to… Ireland was it?
    I know it's easy for me to say, and again - probably totally useless advice, but I really do hope you find something to help turn things around.

  3. #23
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    Sorry OP but most of your threads on here point to one main issue- your inconsiderate, selfish, a$$ of a DP. From what you post, it is clear that he doesn't respect you, he doesn't support you, as an individual and as a mother.
    No wonder you feel so overwhelmed all of the time.
    I really believe you need to focus on your marriage first; if you two have a strong and united partnership, then all these other things will be easier.

    Have you spoken to him about maybe getting some counselling?

  4. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to CMF For This Useful Post:

    Californication  (11-01-2016),DT75  (12-01-2016),Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (12-01-2016)

  5. #24
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    For me having my parents nearby has been a godsend when DP isn't here (he works overseas). They moved nearby about 3 months ago. They look after DD so I can clean the house, go to the hairdresser, etc. When DP is home he is a far better 'housewife' than me so I don't need my parents support although they babysit sometimes so DP and I can spend alone time together and it is very appreciated.

    As another PP indicated, maybe the issue is more with your DP not being supportive and understanding enough

  6. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Why the heck didn't your DH take leave from work if you were that sick? Did you flat out tell him how much you needed him?
    I caught it early woke up feeling a bit stiff and sore, but bit too bad. He thought it was ok to go. However by the time a (any) dr fit me in, it was midday and I was dying.

    No excuse, he should have come home, but old habits taught by his mum, who thinks a woman should be a workhorse, die hard.

    I'd like to think that 2 years away from MIL have softened him up a bit, and probably taught me to stick up for myself a bit more. I wouldn't let it happen that way again.

  7. #26
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    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    Do you find things easier with your niece helping? What do you do with the extra time you have?
    Extra time! What's that? 😃My neice is home with the oldest boys so dh and I could work rather than one of us having to take more leave which would be unpaid these final weeks of school holidays. Ds3 is in daycare. She's great with the boys but when we are home we don't expect her to do too much. She's paid to look after the boys during work hours. I'm studying so it's great that I can stay back at work an hour a day to study at the moment due to her being here. She starts working in February.

  8. #27
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    My family support is childcare. How sad is that.

    Without it i would go crazy 😂

  9. #28
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    We don't have any family support.

    Our children are in bed at 8pm at the latest so we have our own time then.

    Also, I am a school teacher but my school aged kids go to vacation care 2 or 3 days each week in the school holidays. That's my time to get to appointments, visit the accountant, get the car serviced, go to the movies, catch up with childless friends, etc.

    My husband and I have to go out separately or pay a babysitter if we want to go to dinner.

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