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  1. #21
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    I can't see the last image from the book OP?

    You know my issues with ds1 however I have to say just after he turned 4 something switched. It's like he naturally went through a development phase, his speech improved and so did his behavior.


    Were still following through with the paed's recommendations to get hearing/speech formally assessed. If that doesn't reveal anything when we check back in with the paed in a few months I will be discussing other options such as further testing of courses I can do (I'm sure the paed will be able to help). I suppose my point is I went with a paed at first as I didn't know whether the core issue was medical, behavioral or psychological.

    Hang in there xx

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    A-Squared  (07-01-2016)

  3. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by A-Squared View Post
    Wow, there's a lot of good advice here, not sure where to start!



    Yeah I've been planning on going to see a psych for myself as I need new coping mechanisms and think I may have some anxiety issues at play.

    I haven't had her hearing checked but her speech is really good and she always hears noises I can't hear and asks me what was that noise, but something to keep in mind



    How did you choose a psych? Referral from a GP or paed?

    I think maybe our paed will be first port of call as she has allergies and CMPI and her diet is shocking - eating is another daily battle, so maybe he might have some advice re: her health before helping us with a child psych. I actually think there may be one in the centre where he practices.
    Ds1 was 6 when we decided to seek the advice/opinion of the school psych re ds's behaviour at home. He was very competitive with ds2 and other behaviour issues that were driving us crazy (he didn't have behaviour issues at school) We weren't confident we were dealing with his behaviour in the right way.

  4. #23
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    Thank you. I am leaning towards our paed first actually. It's hard to know isn't it what's 'normal' and what's not isn't it?

    She's got great speech and talks the head off a chook, but often her brain works faster than her mouth! Haha

    I'm going to also continue to read the book and seek some help for myself first.

    I'll try and post the image again.

    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1452164913.503359.jpg

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    VicPark  (07-01-2016)

  6. #24
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    Are you keen on books also? I think it could help.
    Jesper Juul "Your Competent child", "Playful parenting" - forgot author. Faber and Mazlish especially "Siblings without rivalry".
    Remember that 4 year old is normal defiant period in kids, that coming from "Child behaviour" Frances Ilg, Louise Bates Ames and Sidney Baker.

    Just having the knowledge is really helping.
    It also gives you a timeframe and idea what to expect, what is "normal" I mean from developmental point of view, and points you towards some solutions. Or at least gives you some ideas

  7. #25
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    Thank you for those suggestions, I'll continue reading Toddler Taming, but will look I to those books if I'm still looking for further information.

    I'm quite interested in the one about what's normal developmentally.

  8. #26
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    Sorry for the late post. The book for Triple P is called "Every Parent" by Matthew Sanders.

  9. #27
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    I've had terrible problems with my nearly 9 year old. We've fought since she was about 4. Still having terrible tantrums at 5 and even now. I tried so many things. My only advice is read up on positive parenting ideas. That bit you posted is in the same vein I think, letting go of how we think our kids should behave and seeing them for the individuals they are. In retrospect one of the biggest mistakes I made was how I handled her anger / outbursts. I wish I'd know about emotion coaching, letting her know all emotions are ok but some behaviours such as hitting are not. I fuelled the flame, we've been stuck in a vicious cycle. The things she's said to me... It hurts and I've felt so disappointed and angry. I'm so careful to never call her names but I'd get angry, take it personally rather than trying to figure out what's behind the behaviour. Not sure if that makes sense but I wish I'd read a wider variety of parenting ideas back then.
    Check out happy families website too, Coulson does private parenting courses but I think they are very expensive!!

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    yvona  (11-01-2016)


 

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