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  1. #21
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    I'm lucky in that I've never had anything nasty said to me by my kids.

    There have been some things that hurt though.
    Like my perfectionist DS2 who is very hard on himself when he tried new things and doesn't get it right. He always says things like "I suck at this", but once I remember him saying "I suck at this, I can't do anything right, and I hate myself". He got a talking to about that one.

    The other morning I was upset/angry all day about a comment my DS1 said while walking out the door for school. He has Aspergers and has a lot of catastrophic thoughts, which really upset me because this warped view is his actual view of real life. Anyway he was sulking around and I asked him what's wrong and he got all teary and said "You call me mean names all the time!!" I was soooooooooo annoyed. I stewed on it all day. He did apologise to me in the afternoon but I know he was just doing it because it was expected of him, I have no doubt that in his little head he believes I call him names. Pretty hurtful as a parent to know that.

  2. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jensha View Post
    Dd has started the your mean and I hate you and just constant attitude and rudeness. Is this a 8 and half year old girl thing?
    In our case its a 4+ year old girl thing that has just gotten worse (she is now 8.5 as well). And knowing puberty and tween/teen years are sneaking up I suspect it won't improve any time soon.

  3. #23
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    The "you're mean" and "I hate you" comments are like water off a ducks back to me- I see it as confirmation I am doing a good job haha

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  5. #24
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    Quote Originally Posted by sparklebug View Post
    Lol I had a similar one a few months ago whilst in the midst of one of those omg I have nothing to wear melt downs, DS who is 4, was watching me frantically changing for the 10th time and says don't worry mum, you're not that fat, your just a bit fat lol

    The word hate is considered a swear word in our house so my cherubs don't use it, DS's latest when he doesn't get what he wants is "nobody in this house loves me! No one!!"
    I had my wisdom teeth out yesterday so I was hiding in bed most of the. DS1 comes in and has beautiful look of wonder on his face and says : Mum!!! You're having a baby????
    Me: uh, no...
    Ds1: then why is your tummy so big?

    Whilst it is a bit funny, I was a bit hurt because I have worked so hard to lose my tummy this year!
    He has the usual "I never get anything/ you don't love me/ how rude of you" comments. 4 has been a tricky age...

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  7. #25
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    Quote Originally Posted by CMF View Post
    Like my perfectionist DS2 who is very hard on himself when he tried new things and doesn't get it right. He always says things like "I suck at this", but once I remember him saying "I suck at this, I can't do anything right, and I hate myself". He got a talking to about that one.
    Aw! I can empathise, I'm pretty susceptible to negative self-talk. Is he old enough to appreciate Adventure Time? Best quote from that show - "Sucking at something is the first step to being sorta good at something". I have this stuck on my desk at work to remind myself that it's ok to suck at things sometimes

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  9. #26
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    My 4 yo treasure when throwing a tantrum because she's been told off/told no - "you're not my best friend anymore!!!"

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  11. #27
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    Quote Originally Posted by SheWarrior View Post
    The "you're mean" and "I hate you" comments are like water off a ducks back to me- I see it as confirmation I am doing a good job haha
    Me too 😇

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    "I feel like I want to kill myself"...

    No, we don't believe he meant it (when he 'learns' something new, he tends to 'use' it to his advantage. He said this after I said he had had enough treats. Last year he was saying he would shoot someone for similar things, after seeing it on the news).

    But, yes we are taking it seriously- not worth the chance.

  13. #29
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    Quote Originally Posted by SheWarrior View Post
    The "you're mean" and "I hate you" comments are like water off a ducks back to me- I see it as confirmation I am doing a good job haha
    True!

    I always think of that Tom Hanks line from sleepless in Seattle where the son is really angry and says "I hate you" and Hanks says "good! You'll have a lot to tell Oprah"

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    SheWarrior  (19-12-2015)

  15. #30
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    Quote Originally Posted by Jensha View Post
    Dd has started the your mean and I hate you and just constant attitude and rudeness. Is this a 8 and half year old girl thing?
    Oh yes I remember it clearly, it all began around 8 with DD, I'd love to tell you it'll get better soon, but we're now at 11.5 and I still am not seeing the light at the end of the tunnel.
    Even though DD doesn't say mean things it's the attitude/tone and eye rolling that drives me absolutely crazy!!


 

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