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  1. #1
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    Default At my wits end :( attachment parenting advice pls

    Hey mums,

    I'm currently in my car in tears as I'm at breaking point. DD1 is 5.5 months and has had one stretch of 3.5hrs sleep since she was 3 months. She's up 3-4 times a night every two hours.

    I've implemented a routine at home for naps but the last two days it's taken me over an hour to get her down. She falls asleep and then 'ping!' She's awake again.

    We semi coslept until 2 weeks ago through the worst of the 4mth sleep regression. Went to bed in her bassinet and then she spent a portion with me. She actually likes her cot and had a 2 hour nap in there today so not keen to start co sleeping again.

    She has a comforter and no dummy.

    Good thing my DH came home just now as I was borderline going to leave her to CIO.

    I'm mentally and physically beyond exhausted. She's a happy little person and I don't want to CIO ( I'm 100% against it ) but I'm cracking up. The patting and shhhhhing is rubbish as she just cries harder in the cot so I have to pick her up.

    All the resources say her day awake time should be 2 hours but she'll look exhausted and not sleep and take over an hour to get to sleep.. It's so confusing.

    Please can someone whose attachment parent minded help me? I'm drowning here 😞

    TIA
    Last edited by amiracle4me; 08-12-2015 at 17:16.

  2. #2
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    Hugs hun its tough sometimes. If she won't go to sleep at the scheduled nap time maybe she's ready for a change. Maybe try keeping her awake for an hour or so after the original nap time and then put her down for a nap.

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    Sending virtual hugs your way....

    The only idea I can think of is co-sleeping (with you pretending to be asleep) to get her to fall asleep then transferring her into her cot.

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    The only thing I can say is, "take her into bed with you!". Coming from an attachment minded mumma, that is honestly what she is asking you for. That's why she's unsettled - she's used to having you close literally all the time while she sleeps. I have breastfed my two to sleep and just stayed in bed next to them for their first almost 2 years of life. Then they are happy to drop off solo after a bedtime story. Co sleeping isn't a life sentence!

    I hear you saying you're not keen to go back to it, but if the alternative is being so strung out and sleep deprived, could it be the right option? I know it doesn't feel like it now but those newborn months will just fly by. Very easy to go with the flow.

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    deku  (08-12-2015)

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    She's already up for 3 or so hours at a time. I can't co sleep any more. I'm sick of it. We did that for the last month and I don't think she particularly likes it either. Once asleep she likes the cot. It's just getting her to sleep. She hits two hours. Looks knackered. I feed her and then she's drowsy and then she's awake and chatting again in minutes. We do that merry go round for an hour. 😕

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    Quote Originally Posted by BornToBe View Post
    The only thing I can say is, "take her into bed with you!". Coming from an attachment minded mumma, that is honestly what she is asking you for. That's why she's unsettled - she's used to having you close literally all the time while she sleeps. I have breastfed my two to sleep and just stayed in bed next to them for their first almost 2 years of life. Then they are happy to drop off solo after a bedtime story. Co sleeping isn't a life sentence!

    I hear you saying you're not keen to go back to it, but if the alternative is being so strung out and sleep deprived, could it be the right option? I know it doesn't feel like it now but those newborn months will just fly by. Very easy to go with the flow.
    Thank you for the reply but I don't think she likes it. I brought her into bed with me the other night at 3am and she grumbled. Went straight back to sleep in the cot.

    Nighttime she's fine at going back to sleep for a feed. All these problems are in the day.

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    Have you got a sling?

    That was pretty well way my kids slept during the day at all. Ever.

    They woke up every single time I put them in the cot.

    I occasionally had success with a car drive. I would then take their baby capsule out of the car and bring it into the house. No way could I transfer them from the capsule to the cot. **disclaimer, I know leaving babies to sleep in a baby capsule it isn't good for their backs**

    At night I coslept and fed them whenever they stirred. I had one child who started the night in the cot sometimes, but the rest of mine would only sleep with me.

    The good new was that as soon as I weaned them they were happy to sleep in their own beds and *mostly* sleep through the night.

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    BornToBe  (08-12-2015)

  10. #8
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    Try an infant swing. Lifesaver for me.

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    GrabbyCrabby  (26-12-2015)

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    My baby was exactly the same, its the reason i started co sleeping because he would be be waking every 2 hours for a feed for many months. Have you got a baby carrier like a hugabub? That might help her sleep during the day and once she's asleep you could try transitioning her to the cot. Or a swing? We had a fisher price my lil lamb swing which was great.

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    BornToBe  (08-12-2015)

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    Default At my wits end :( attachment parenting advice pls

    Quote Originally Posted by GlitterFarts View Post
    Try an infant swing. Lifesaver for me.
    Thanks but at 5.5mths and nearly 9kg she's outgrown her swing.


 

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