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  1. #1
    harvs's Avatar
    harvs is offline Winner 2014 - Spirit of BubHub Award
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    Default What has 2015 taught you?

    About yourself? Life?

    I know it's a bit early in December, but I've been thinking about it a lot lately.

    I guess for me it would be:
    - I function a lot better when I use my planner to either plan ahead or retrospectively to write in little jobs I've achieved in the day;

    - I am and will be ok on my own. If I happen to meet someone else long term it will be because of wanting be with that particular person rather than fear of dying alone;

    - this year I learnt to drive, bought a house and put together my first IKEA flatpack. You're never too old to improve/learn/grow;

    - my fear of abandonment holds me back to this day, but I'm realising that it's happened and I've survived it so I no longer freeze from panic when I think about it. I'll survive the next time, and the next time too;

    - I have been hard to work with this year. My tolerance for my colleagues has been low and I haven't communicated as well as I should. Being angry at life is no excuse for being intolerant of others;

    - this world is becoming more and more scary. We all need to be brave and forge connections with likeminded people, and give these connections life and love and attention, because I believe alienation and disaffection are killing this planet;

    - I like stickers.

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  3. #2
    FearlessLeader's Avatar
    FearlessLeader is offline Winner 2013 - Most Memorable Thread
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    Great thread!
    I have learned that I'm just an introvert and that's ok, but I do need to push myself to interact with other people more because the benefits outweigh the initial discomfort of talking to new people. Community is very important to me but I need to get out there and be more actively involved!
    I've also learned so much about the importance of nature, especially for my children. We live in the inner city in an apartment and it's now a big goal of mine to make sure that my kids get enough time in nature. In 2017 I'm sending DD to a kinder that does Bush Kinder once a week in the local park (vast and native) which I'm really excited about, and I'm continually striving to find ways to incorporate the natural world and natural movement into all of our lives- taking off our shoes, playing in the dirt, walking more, and paying more attention to the world around us.

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  5. #3
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    - my second child is a lot stronger and more independent than I have ever given her credit for.

    - my eldest moved schools and went from being one of the smartest kids in her class to being really behind. She spent one term struggling and in tears. And lonely. But through a lot of work on my part and hers (mainly hers) she's pulled her mark up massively, gotten to the top 25% of the class and has lots of friends. She can be a bit of a slacker so I'm really proud of her.

    - I actually like exercise. I've started cross fit this year and now go 4 to 5 times a week. And I love it.

    - I can wake up every day at 5am if it's to do something I love.

    - there is no limit on how many times my youngest and I can watch the minion movie.

    - Shaun the Sheep is still funny 8 years on.

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  7. #4
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    Default What has 2015 taught you?

    That you never know what is around the corner.
    That I love my husband more than I ever thought I could love someone (that I didn't grow)
    That kids ARE resilient but they are also fragile and vulnerable and show it in a multitude of ways.
    That mother guilt gets you in the weirdest ways and the strangest times.
    That I'm a good chook mum.
    That being open to friendship and putting yourself out there is scary as sh1t but worth it
    That I'm an imperfect work in progress.
    That watching a baby come into the world is THE most special thing ever.

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  9. #5
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    Default What has 2015 taught you?

    that crap things happen and it's ok, and crap things happen to us all, ie despite my ocd planning and control freak tendencies, sometimes life will throw a spanner in the works. none of us is immune to that.

    when aforementioned crap things happen, I am surprisingly more resilient than I originally thought and really, all you can do in the end, is just put one foot in front of the other and keep on plodding on.

    when things get better and work out, the gratitude you have for your life when it's crap-free is phenomenal.

    I've also realised I probably put a lot of energy into stupid things and should try and redirect that energy into more positive things. this is a work in progress.

    2015 has been a crazy but exciting year. we bought our first house. we made our first baby. we got through hubby's redundancy and a car accident that saw us reduced to having no car at all. we got through all of it. yay!!

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    That I've turned into a "sayer" and stopped being a doer. And I hate it.
    That I don't cope with stress as well as I used to.
    That my kids now define me which I partly hate and partly love.
    Its also the year that I realised all my "issues" around self esteem, self worth, ED, social anxiety and the births of my children are always going to be there which is kind of depressing and kind of comforting all at the same time.

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  13. #7
    TheGooch's Avatar
    TheGooch is offline Winner 2014 - Newbie of the Year
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    Fantastic thread!
    - babies can be really hard work
    - communication is hard when you're both exhausted
    - it's ok to use one of the million sick leave days I have to just be at home with my boy.
    - anxiety can be controlled, eventually
    - joy is toddler giggles
    - hearing "mum" for the first time will make you cry like a baby
    - I can have and do it all, providing I'm willing to compromise sometimes
    - support sometimes comes from the most unexpected places

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    That I am a million times stronger than I ever thought.

    That dd1 is stronger and a total inspiration to me.

    That making list actually eased my anxiety. I would have never thought that.

    Planning for the worse and hoping for the best has actually also helped my fears.

    That things that I hated and couldn't understand why it is they way it is. Can actually turn out to be your saviour. So be grateful for everything even if you can't understand why it happening.

    That I am grateful for my sister. She is a total column of strength. And my bil who I never liked has become a friend.

    To roll with the punches.

    To accept myself for who I am. I can't spell I can't write well and my meaning often gets lost in translation but I am loved anyhow. The people that matter will look past all that and see me.

    That having something real that all wonky and a little weird is so much better than picture perfect.

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    It has been a big year for me - the birth of my first child and moving cities.

    1. I need to spend more quality time with my friends and family. A couple of serious illness has reminded me that we don't last forever.

    2. I was wasting my life being a stressed out workaholic. I'm loving being a SAHM not only because I enjoy looking after DD but because it's forced me to actually get a life - make friends, go for coffees, lunches, etc. When I return to work I need to be very careful not to slip into old habits.

    3. I enjoy a slower paced life style. I moved from the city to a smaller seaside town and surprisingly love it. I don't think I would.

    4. I now understand the intense love that parents have for their children.

    5. My parents and DP are awesome, I need to show my appreciation of them more.

    6. Webforums are interesting!!

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    - That I can develop strengths in areas I never thought I could.

    - That I don't have to make everyone happy, and I shouldn't have to make everyone happy.

    - That I don't need to have the house completely tidy or clean all of the time, but it will help my stress/anxiety if it is part way to meeting my usual standards.

    - That I am a control freak and I need to let go more.

    - That compassion and kindness are undervalued and underutilised. This also often applies to people in relation to themselves. As a consequence, empathy is lacking.

    - Some people are willfully ignorant, and it doesn't matter what you do to help educate them, if they don't want to know, you can't make them see.

    - That I can cope better than I thought I would on minimal sleep.

    - I am really impatient, and I don't like it.

    - That while meeting new people scares the absolute crap out of me (introvert lifestyle here), it can definitely have amazing rewards.

    - Asking for and accepting help isn't going to be easy, but once you know the right people to ask, life is much happier.

    - I need to be able to get back into my creative spaces, because psychologically, I am in a better place when I have a means to vent.

    - Self care is important, and I really miss reading.

    I could keep going... it's been a big year for me, with lots of big steps out of my comfort zone.

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