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    Default Phone contact

    Can anyone help me with how phone contact is organised after separation? I have 2 1/2 year olds who are very verbal and enjoy chatting to their dad. He is ringing twice a day at the moment 7am and 6pm. It's actually tricky to always be available at these times and it's tricky for him too. But if we don't have set times i feel like we are always waiting, or he is, and we miss calls etc. What do others do?? Are set times better? How much flexibility should i have ( he tends to be unreliable! ). It's getting very frustrating trying to make it work and is causing conflict.

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    Can't offer much help.. But my girls are 9 & 5... When I have them I ask if they want to ring their dad.. sometimes they say yes other times no. Regardless if it's a work day or not. Just not after 8pm. other times I take a photo the girls and send it to him. so he can see what their doing... Being young world be very tricky. another suggestion to send a voice message ??? However like making a phone call to anyone.. sometimes their able to chat other times they can't. Or cut phone calls to end of day so they can talk about what she's done ????

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    NAT2561  (28-12-2015)

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    Oh contact for my 2 was every Wednesday and Sunday nights at 7pm. They were 4 and 6

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    NAT2561  (28-12-2015)

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    Hmmmm....seems i might be being too cooperative here. When he disappears and doesn't contact for a few days the girls are far more settled so maybe I'm putting us all through too much with constant contact....especially when he isn't always reliable and it's disrupting us waiting when he doesn't call.

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    Maybe just set a time in the evening when it suits you both. Don't wait for the call, just make sure your phone is in earshot and go about your evening. There will always be times he can't call and when you can't answer. Hopefully both sides understand this and it can remain conflict-free

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    My kids call their dad at any time, if and when they feel like it. If he doesn't answer they leave a message and he calls back when he can. If he wants to call he can as well. I don't limit contact whatsoever...
    Set times would be a pain in the butt!

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    SSecret Squirrel  (29-12-2015)

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    Dss can call his mum whenever, if she's unavailable she'll call back (he doesn't often call though. We have put in place a rule, can only call past 8 if it's an emergency. She was quite often calling most nights around 10-11 pm so we had no 'couple time' ie date nights or even just watching a movie together once he was in bed

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    Twice a day is a lot! My kids don't have set times, but DP does have set court-ordered times. He calls them on Monday and Friday between 7-7:30pm on the fortnights that he doesn't have them (we have them 6 out of 14 nights).

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    Quote Originally Posted by Kaybaby View Post
    My kids call their dad at any time, if and when they feel like it. If he doesn't answer they leave a message and he calls back when he can. If he wants to call he can as well. I don't limit contact whatsoever...
    Set times would be a pain in the butt!
    This is what we do. I deliberately made sure there were no set times for phone calls in our orders. Long term, set times are a pain as they are not always practical eg as the child gets older they may be involved in activities that are on at the stipulated time.

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    @NAT2561 sorry if I missed the boat here but so sorry to hear about your separation.

    I don't have set times for calling, but as DS gets older I intend to negotiate these. I think twice a day is too much, personally, although I do commend you for trying to keep the communication regular for your daughters.

    I remember my dad was very unreliable with his calls, and it was heartbreaking.


 

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