If he was sacrificing family time to go for after work drinks, or there was actual flirting involved I could definitely be on board with a foot being put down. But to me it just sounds like a very friendly work place. If my DP said he wasn't comfortable with me being so close with my colleagues, I would fair tell him to jump in the sea and he can't tell me who I can and can't be friends with. But that's just me- as you said something clearly happened at the last workplace so that changes things. However, we don't know what that is and whether the history of that makes a big difference in this situation. As usual, we only have the OP's words on the situation so I'm trying to take things at face value and think of how I would feel/react in such a situation.
Like you I am bringing my own experiences to this thread and I saw a lot of behaviour in past jobs that really crossed the line. So I guess that is colouring my perspective.
like anyone I'd rather spend 8 or 10 hours a day in environments that are fun and a place I look forward to going to. I do draw the line though at sexually inappropriate language and the soft c0ck remind was like nails on a blackboard to me.
Maybe my opinion is clouded by that fact we are open Christian and dh is a ex-pastor.
But there is no way in freaking he'll it's okay to call my husband a soft c0ck. He wouldn't take it and I would explode. Since most of his work life is done in the public eye it's very unlikely that sort of thing would happen. His workmates know me and my kids and stop us in supermarket to chat. So it not that we aren't friendly. Calling anyone a soft **** or a female version is way across the line. It never of in a work place and shouldn't be allowed by the powers at be.
I am disgusted that anyone thinks it on to refer to another work mates sex organs whether they be female or male.
I wouldn't feel comfortable with my husband having that kind of dynamic with his female coworkers - I think it's valid that you're feeling uncomfortable with it.
It's all well and good to be friendly with your colleagues, but relations with colleagues are best kept within professional boundaries - work shouldn't be an inappropriate flirt-fest for partnered folks.
I think your DH loves the attention - the question is, will he have the decency not to cross any lines?
I have worked in so many different work places over the years and on balance I much prefer the friendly but with boundaries ones. So much better for everyone in the long run.
We're probably swinging wildly off topic, but I think it's worth the OP considering that her husband may just enjoy being friends with his colleagues and it doesn't mean there's anything inappropriate going on.
I'm still baffled by the suggestions of flirting, I really don't see anything of the sort having been described.
I actually see someone continually bringing up their wife and family, possibly to create a barrier. He's constantly reminding his coworkers he's married with kids. No woman has ever said "oh he put his young son on the phone to me- he's totally into me".
In my opinion he's sending out clear unavailable messages, not flirting.
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