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  1. #581
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    @Minib: yes, ngala taught us pat and Shoosh. Oh,...patting the head thing. That's a magic touch. If the crying is too much, pick him up, cuddle him and try again. We changed tactic many times but the basis is the same. Pat and Shoosh. You will learn Dd personality. We did. DS always fusses /cries before a nap. The duration correlates on how tired he is. If he is super tired, it doesn't take long to pat and Shoosh. He fusses and cries less. Dozes off very quick. That's why we no longer putting him down the moment he shows tired sign. We just wait until he is "asking" us to help him for nap. If no luck in the cot with me Getting tired of patting and listening him cry, i just put him in the swing. If no luck, just let him be. Play whatever. He doesn't get enough nap but I find it stressful to force him to sleep. After we got back from the ngala, it was all about sleep training him to nap and we felt too stressful. Once we let it go, everyone is happy.

  2. #582
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    I haven't even known her personality very well so def very premature for any type of cc etc. def not doing CC or CIO now until she's older or ready. At least 4 months.

  3. #583
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    Quote Originally Posted by Minib View Post
    I haven't even known her personality very well so def very premature for any type of cc etc. def not doing CC or CIO now until she's older or ready. At least 4 months.
    Luv..I know it's very stressful/tiring and downright exhausting at times with a newborn. My DD was a catnapper too and would rarely sleep for more than 1 sleep Cycle (or 30-45mins) before waking as a newborn in the day. She wouldn't sleep in her bassinet either during daylight hours (though would at night??).

    Anyhoo..in the end, I let her sleep wherever she would. On her mat under her Playgym, in the pram in the house, on the lounge using a sleep positioner (before she could roll..I'd put her on her side to sleep and superviser her), on the bed either with/without the sleep positioner, in her bouncer/rocker thing...wherever!!

    My advice is to do the same in the daytime at least. It won't lead to "bad" sleep associations down the track either just in case you're worried. I think for the first 3-4 months you do whatever it is you have to do to get them to sleep so you can have a much needed break/rest as it's utterly exhausting having a newborn as it is let alone one who doesn't sleep very well or has medical issues like @bbhope's DS with reflux etc.

    The thing is, sleep is a developmental thing. When they're developmentally ready, they'll get into more of a routine (barring any medical issues that might impact on their abilitly to sleep) plus as they get older and can eat more, that will also help. My DD's day naps starting settling into a routine around the 12-13 week mark. As I said earlier, at night was never a problem and she'd wake every 3-4 hours as is normal for a newborn.

    The books you read about what a baby "should or shouldn't" be doing are only guidelines. Please don't get too hung up on what they say. All babies are their own little individuals with their own personalities so it's not helpful to compare to others or take the advice from books/other people (even me!!) as law.

    It also takes a bit of time to get to know your bub too. I think you can pretty much write off the first 3 months as a time for getting to know each other and bub working out their body clock etc. Don't worry about "sleep associations", "schedules" and all that other crap right now. Just do what you have to do to get both of yourselves through this time.

    It will be over before you know it (even though some days can feel like forever I know!!) and soon bub will be settling into a routine of her own

    P.S...What I did was when DD was about 8-10 weeks old, I just started a very loose routine of feeding/nappy change (if needed), wrappping (if your bub likes that), dummy, lullably music on a portable cd player (that takes batteries in case of power outage), patting and shushing. At night, I turned on her night light that flashes up all different colours in addition to the above. I also added her pink rabbit "cuddly" when she got too big for wrapping.


    I just did that over and over and if it worked, great, if not, then I'd get her up and wait for tired signs again or try again afterwards if she was due a feed by then. When she'd wake after a sleep cycle, I'd go in and pat and shush her back to sleep. Sometimes I'd start her on her side patting and shushing then turn her over on her back as she drifted off to sleep. Sometimes it worked and sometimes not.

    Eventually it worked for us which I think was a combination of DD getting older and DP & I being consistent with what we were doing at sleep time.
    Last edited by BlondeinBrisvegas; 19-01-2016 at 08:04.

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    Minib  (19-01-2016)

  5. #584
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    Thanks for the links @BlondeinBrisvegas. I do agree with them that CIO in its natural sense just doesn't seem to be good for bub. As i was saying bub has changed sleep patterns again since being at my mums and refuses to self soothe or even assisted soothe (ie. the shoosh and pat). As soon as you start to swaddle him screaming bloody murder starts until you pick him up then silent. The new thing was that now when you pick him up he falls asleep in your arms without crying bloody murder (most times) whereas previously he screamed no matter what (in the arms, in the cot etc) It was his way of soothing himself. Screaming till his veins popped out and then out like a light (must be held usually tho). I never knew a baby would scream like that even when held. Anyways last few days he started not crying when held and fell asleep on our shoulder. Mum didn't like the idea of him no longer being able to self soothe even tho he could at least do that before a few times a day so she insisted on CIO. Oh it was horrible. Listening to those cries and him getting to a point where he had no more energy to cry and it'd just be a moan. Think it went on for about 10 minutes until i just barged in there and grabbed him and couldn't help but yell at my mum to leave us alone. So i just held him but he was so distressed and i felt so awful that i started crying myself. No more CIO it out for our son (not that it was CIO anyways cos he didn't go to sleep). Eventually my mum took him off me and rocked him to sleep with a dummy and he smiled just before going to sleep. I think she felt bad. I just don't think CIO it out works. Like i said earlier, the way i taught DS to self soothe was through rocking in the cot without picking him up and it was always cry then stop then cry again. He was trying to get himself to sleep with my rocking, shusshing and patting him. It was never just leave him by himself and him continuously wailing for minutes on end. Eventually he was able to self soothe after i assisted him to sleep in the cot a few times but i suppose that's gone now. I'm sure i can get him to self soothe again. @Minib - yeh 6 weeks is def too young but it's never too young to try and get them to sleep without picking them up. You could try the shoosh and pat technique or try distract them through talking, singing or playing music to them. Just persist and if it doesn't work them pick them up and try again.

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    BlondeinBrisvegas  (19-01-2016)

  7. #585
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    I just held ds to sleep. Towards the end he starts fussing so I stick in a dummy and he falls asleep. I put him in his cot and he opens his eyes and spits out the dummy. I quickly shove it back in and he spits it out again and give me a grease so I leave it out and he falls asleep. Haha so funny.

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    BlondeinBrisvegas  (19-01-2016)

  9. #586
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    I have been trying to locate formula whole morning. Now I have more than I need if these pharmacies have what they said they have tomorrow.

    DS slept in the bouncer just now. Dummy in, the cuddly and I just bounced. That's all I did. he did his standard 30nins. Now awake. Chatty.
    @Gelati: do DS hands come together just yet? DS only lifts and looks at his right hand. Neck is still floppy. No rolling yet.

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    BlondeinBrisvegas  (19-01-2016)

  11. #587
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    Quote Originally Posted by bbhope View Post
    I have been trying to locate formula whole morning. Now I have more than I need if these pharmacies have what they said they have tomorrow.

    DS slept in the bouncer just now. Dummy in, the cuddly and I just bounced. That's all I did. he did his standard 30nins. Now awake. Chatty.
    @Gelati: do DS hands come together just yet? DS only lifts and looks at his right hand. Neck is still floppy. No rolling yet.
    If you end up with too much just sell it on Gumtree, Ebay, Buy.Sell or Swap pages in your area on Facebook etc Luv. It's a popular brand that's in shortage so it will sell.

  12. #588
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    Good point, @BlondeinBrisvegas.

    It is a bouncer day today. DS doesn't want swing today. Nap in bouncer the second time. His reflux has gotten worse since on this HA formula. Now switched back to Nan before i get on hold of a new tin. I am returning both tins from the pharmacy. They better let me exchange the opened one.

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    BlondeinBrisvegas  (19-01-2016)

  14. #589
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    @bbhope - good to hear you've located formula! Yes should be easy to resell esp if it's so hard to find.

    You're so lucky to have a swing that ds likes. No chance for ds to fall asleep anywhere other than our arms then cot. Sometimes car seat and pram.

    Ds can hold hands but still floppy neck and can't roll over

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    He didn't like the swing when we bought it. But now, he does. I thought you have one? DS will sleep on us if we allow him to. DH let him sleep on his chest for a short while when he gets home. I am OK with it because he wants some father and son time. On weekend, i get annoyed because i am trying hard to cut the habit. i have to deal with DS on weekday and i want him to sleep elsewhere not in my arms. OK, i let him if he really fusses or stomach si bothering him.

    The pram...wish he would do that again. No luck.


 

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