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  1. #1
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    Default How would you feel?

    The other thread about when your water broke got me thinking. I gave birth to my dd one and a half years ago. When we arrived at the hospital in the early morning, dr did an internal check and told me i was 6cm dilated. But what she didn't tell me was that she broke my water with me and my husband being fully unaware. When my husband asked if he can go and get the hospital bag from the car, dr advised him to not to as i might have the baby very soon. My labour progressed pretty quickly however, even though i was having so much pain from contractions, it was still on the back of my mind that when will my water break. At one point, i asked the midwife and she told me dr has already broke my water when she did the internal. I was quite upset as i know i should be informed of what is to happen to my body. When i had my ds, drs discussed with me if they can break the water artificially as i had a prolonged labour, explained how they are going to do it and showed the hook kind of thing they were going to use.
    Even to this day, whenever i think about dd's labour, i feel upset. I feel violated by the act of the dr. I feel i was not respected as a patient or as a person as the Dr didn't even bother to explain to me what is going to happen to my body. I was not given a choice. I was excluded from the decision making process.

    Dh thinks we should complain to the hospital, but i thought this feeling would go away, however it is getting stronger. Sometimes i wonder if i am overreacting as my water was going to break anyone.

    How would you feel?

  2. #2
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    Firstly I'm sorry this happened to you.

    Did the Dr break them on purpose? My understanding is that doing an internal might break them.

    But even then the doctor should have told you that it happened.

    You didn't get a big whoosh of water? Bed completely soaked?

  3. #3
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    I am not sure if dr did it on purpose or not but midwife simply told me dr had broke my water when she did the internal. I didn't feel anything, i can feel dr doing internal but i didn't feel waters coming out or being soaked in bed. I do remember i had many towels underneath me.

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    I'm sorry you feel like this.

    I would make a complaint to the complaints officer at the hospital. They will review your chart and if necessary will get a Dr to meet with you to explain what happened and why.

    If it's still bothering you it's important to have the opportunity to better understand what happened.

    Good luck

  5. #5
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    Default How would you feel?

    Firstly, I'm also sorry this happened and that you're having a tough time.

    I can completely understand how you would feel.
    Without being there it is hard to say- i suppose there is 3 possible scenarios.

    1. The doctor artificially ruptured them using the hook (like you were showed with your DS) and they both (shockingly and awfully) didn't inform you. Whilst anything is possible and maybe I'm optimistic, I really hope and doubt this would be the case as that is obviously a massive violation of you and your rights - let alone his responsibility as a Dr.

    2. During the VE the dr accidentally broke your waters, and failed to inform you of it. It is completely possible for this to happen - especially if your waters were bulging. However, the dr should have informed you that it had occurred.

    3. Your waters ruptured at some point that nobody was able to determine (also completely possible!) I'm only a student midwife but have seen plenty of women who didn't know there's had broken or we weren't sure when it had happened precisely. In which case perhaps your midwife has just assumed roughly timing wise that it may have occurred during the VE - and has said it without explaining/considering how you may feel.

    In any case you clearly weren't informed enough of what was happening/how things were progressing which isn't good enough.
    I would write a letter to the hospital seeking an explanation. They will still have your records on file and you should be able to get some closure as to (at the very least) what time it occurred and whether it was an ARM (artificially ruptured) or whether it happened spontaneously.
    Either way, I think you are owed an apology for them failing to keep you involved and informed.

    Hopefully you feel better soon, it is very normal to have negative feelings towards a birth or parts of it- and I don't think it would be unreasonable to seek some counseling if you think it would help you.
    Last edited by CodieBloom; 26-11-2015 at 19:12.

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    Whilst if done on purpose you should have been told...I think you should get over it - much worse things happen in labour and if you have a healthy Bub to show for it then be very thankful

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    Quote Originally Posted by me+he&she=three View Post
    Whilst if done on purpose you should have been told...I think you should get over it - much worse things happen in labour and if you have a healthy Bub to show for it then be very thankful
    Possibly the most dismissive, heartless response I've ever read on here.

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    Quote Originally Posted by me+he&she=three View Post
    Whilst if done on purpose you should have been told...I think you should get over it - much worse things happen in labour and if you have a healthy Bub to show for it then be very thankful
    Are you serious?
    Who are you to tell this mother who is obviously distressed about what happen to "get over it"

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    Quote Originally Posted by me+he&she=three View Post
    Whilst if done on purpose you should have been told...I think you should get over it - much worse things happen in labour and if you have a healthy Bub to show for it then be very thankful
    This is very unhelpful and undermines the op's feelings. Birth trauma is real and can occur even if both Mum & bub are healthy.

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  14. #10
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    Everyone is entitled to their opinion are they not? People wouldn't post in a forum if they didn't want a range of views?!


 

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