Yup. They just don't realise how hard it gets later on.
AFM, I've done up my list and thought it might be handy to put together a little backstory so if he asks me about previous cycles I have an answer for him.
That meant trawling back through Blossom's box for my diary and test results, so as you can probably imagine I've been in tears for the last hour.
Honestly, I don't know how I'm even going to hold myself together for this interview, let alone ask the appropriate questions. Every time I think about the last cycle I lose my shiz. It doesn't get any easier. Everyone said it would get easier, but it doesn't. You just manage to hide the pain some days better than others.
Today is not one of those days
Wow i know people in another group newbies who were moaning cause only 80% of eggs fertilised not 100 percent im like come on ...
Blossom74 but not surprised, it's going to take a long time I imagine, not just a few weeks I'm sure the doc will be used to seeing upset patients. I remember just not even being able to speak at one point and she told me to not be embarrassed (but I was).
When are you seeing your FS?
yeah those posts annoy me also. in the end, I'm sort of ok with only 1 frostie, as I'd feel bad wasting them if one worked and I didn't get to use those other 13. (assuming 1+sibling worked). we'd be happy with 1 bub though 2 would've been nice too, but it's not to be
hugs Blossom. good luck for your appointment
Well, I saw the new FS at 4pm. He was lovely, and very friendly. I spoke to him at length about what we had done so far, and he gave me a list of suggestions to mull over - DHEA (which he wrote me a script for, and I will now have to Google as I don't know anything about it), PGD testing (which I know about from you all), LA (some sort of acid to put in with DH's sperm that apparently attracts the stronger swimmers), endometrial scratches (although he thinks probably not necessary for me because I did achieve implantation) and a few other things.
He said in his honest opinion, he knows my current FS and he thinks it would be wrong for me to swap horses at this stage. He said that my current FS is right on the game and whilst he would happily take me on as a patient he does not believe it would be in my best interest to do so, and that I should follow my FS's lead as he does have a plan and from what he can see he wouldn't do much different.
I held things together very well, considering (A) How distressing this journey has been and (B) The fact that I realised once I sat down that my dress was covered in cake mix
He said (and I concur) that I have proven I can fall pregnant, that I can implant, and what happened to us was just bad luck. That it wasn't my fault (can you guess where I started to cry?) and that it was more than likely just because of age and not anything we did or did not do.
He invited me to contact him if I ever needed to talk or if I had a question, but said he probably wouldn't call back until after hours if that was ok. Ok? Are you kidding, I've only ever spoken to my current FS three times, after hours is FINE!
So that's that then. Off to see my current FS just before Christmas.
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