With the second I felt it was even more important to me. I'd had an amazing birth and recovery and I wanted that again. The second time was so much easier. Everyone just left me to it and I birthed him into my own hands. Once again it was a really amazing birth and recovery.
My opinion is that natural birth should always be the default (in public hospitals you will find it very difficult to convince anyone to give you a CS unless you have a good medical reason) so go from there and then have a look into your natural pain relief options, then medical pain relief options, then surgical options.
I also have a high pain tolerance and really, I just wanted to see if I could do it!
But having never been in labour before, these were my "wants" but I was open to getting that epidural or pethidine if I needed or wanted it for any reason. I went in knowing what my options were and what affects they may have.
I was very fortunate that I had a text book labour and delivery and that I got what I wanted. By the time I was asking for drugs I was ready to push, so it was too late anyway 😉
Eta: just wanted to add, that despite any risks associated with drugs, they are definitely very useful (as well as amazing pain relief!). Eg a friend of mine stopped dialating and was exhausted, she had an epi, dialated the rest of the way very quickly and bub arrived perfectly. No issues whatsoever. It's just good to be informed. Hth 😊
Last edited by Pearlygirl; 24-11-2015 at 16:03.
Meredithgrey: I thought natural birth was drug free - I didn't realise it could mean vaginal delivery as well. Just another indication of how little I understand.
@Julzgulz have you considered hiring a doula? A good doula can assist you with navigating all the options, help you and your partner understand the benefits, risks and alternatives, allowing you to make an informed decision about what is right for you and your individual needs.
There are so many options, and it can be so overwhelming.
I personally have quite a large dose of "hippy" in me and so I tend to want to stick with the most natural way of doing things. So, I wanted to aim for vaginal birth and no drugs. I was open to having them if I decided I couldn't cope, but my preference was not to have them. I did a calm birth course and it was the best! There was only us and one other couple there for two weekends. We learned all about the physiology of giving birth and it was mainly about being prepared to make decisions in a calm way. You may decide to have pain relief, but have it because you made that decision, not because you freaked out and the midwife offered pain relief and so you took it. I ended up with two drug-free, fabulous births (one was an induction due to choleostasis of pregnancy) and I cannot recommend the course enough. It was pricy, but if I had my time again, I'd do it again without hesitation. We found it great for my husband as well, he was very nervous about the whole birth thing as when he was younger, a family friend lost his wife during childbirth. So, that was his only experience with it.
Research everything, have an idea of what you'd like and make a list of this to let your team know. Then, recognize birthing can be unpredictable and despite your best laid plans it might be different to what you planned or expected. But that doesn't have to mean a bad experience, maybe just different. I had an emergency c-section at 36 weeks due to severe preeclampsia. Despite my complications and my bub being really sick the actual birth experience was fine. It was scary at the time but the surgery and recovery were much much easier than I expected. My baby was sick in neonatal care for 2 weeks and we've bonded just fine and she's exclusively breastfed 5 months down the track even though we were separated for a couple of days post birth due to my complications. So the moral of my story is even if things do go pear shaped on 'the day' things can still turn out well. I had a rough birth plan (more like a list of preferences like skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, pain relief etc) and the only things that were achieved out of it were that bub and I were ok and DH went off to take care of her while I was in ICU (I was adamant she wasn't to be left without one of us). I was traumatized from being so unwell and how I managed that in the lead up to the c-section but I have no bad feelings about the birth itself.
All the best for the next few months and your upcoming birth 😊
On that note ^^^, I think the best way to tackle things like that is just to make sure that you feel supported because the emotional aspect of birth is a lot more powerful than than the actual event. Support is key to a great birth experience in my opinion. Whether your baby is born via CS or vaginally doesn't matter as much in the long run as long as you feel like you were supported, were able to make choices for yourself and were informed.
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