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  1. #41
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    3 is such a crappy age, my eldest was just awful at 3, I cried at night a lot.

    He's 5 now but I'm now gearing up for his strong willed brother and my 5 yo still chucks tanties in the shops,

    I'm not above walking away and leaving him (this method does not work with my 2 yo though), If hes risking damaging things I put him in the trolley or I hold his arm firmly til he stops, sometimes this triggers a gigantic tantrum and I have to make him walk beside me, I tend to avoid shopping unless I only have one

  2. #42
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    Quote Originally Posted by Wise Enough View Post
    The other thing to remember is negotiation. My DD1 is the queen of it. Yes my life would be easier if she just accepted my answer and dutifully walked away. But I want her to have these skills later in life!

    There's a mum in my mums group who rides her kids so hard. They aren't allowed to touch or do anything. Shopping trips they are strapped in the pram and aren't allowed anything. At parties she's constantly berating them. And the saddest thing I've ever seen is at the ages of 4 and 2 they are broken. She has broken their spirit. They're just so defeated, and it's really sad to see.

    So yes my child is swilling pink milk in the trolley asking for everything under the sun. She didn't ask to be there while I grocery shop. So she gets a pink milk as a compromise. I say no to the rest of the stuff though .

    I want my kids to think for themselves. I want them to not just take what's dished out to them without questioning it. I know it makes my life harder. But the skills she's learning now she can use later in life. Now it's just asking to swap reading grug for playing barbies with me. But later it will negotiating a pay rise.

    Just remember when he's pushing your boundaries one day he will be pushing the boundaries in his job in a good way
    I totally agree with you. But it does remind me of this LOL. Attachment 75584

  3. #43
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    @harvs I thought of this thread todayas my DD spit water all over me which I've told her off for doing before. So I turned the TV off. She hit me, so I confiscated a toy. Then she decided it was a game so kept hitting me and her baby brother so I would hide stuff.

    She's now in her room under orders to clean it if she wants her stuff back.

    Basically I have no freakin idea what I am doing and I wish toddlers and preschoolers weren't so bloody hard.

    I have to admit though, I found 3 really difficult and there was a period there where we didn't leave the house because it was hell for me and basically left with her kicking and screaming and me looking embarrassed trying to carry two kids out of a shopping centre, play centre, or the most embarrassing of all, old Parliament House. I did find she has got better the closer she got to four, although clearly she still has her moments now.

  4. #44
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    Quote Originally Posted by smallpotatoes View Post
    @harvs I thought of this thread todayas my DD spit water all over me which I've told her off for doing before. So I turned the TV off. She hit me, so I confiscated a toy. Then she decided it was a game so kept hitting me and her baby brother so I would hide stuff.

    She's now in her room under orders to clean it if she wants her stuff back.

    Basically I have no freakin idea what I am doing and I wish toddlers and preschoolers weren't so bloody hard.

    I have to admit though, I found 3 really difficult and there was a period there where we didn't leave the house because it was hell for me and basically left with her kicking and screaming and me looking embarrassed trying to carry two kids out of a shopping centre, play centre, or the most embarrassing of all, old Parliament House. I did find she has got better the closer she got to four, although clearly she still has her moments now.
    I thought of this before. When my DS was hitting me because I would not let him walk to the back of the bus when it was moving. The looks. The shame. I have no idea what to do either....

  5. #45
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    Picking your battles is up to the individual...so for me if I expected them to not touch the xmas tree, then they were going to learn it wasn't okay.
    At the end of the day, we're all winging it...if currency works, use it. If cuddles work, use it. If your kid is doing something that you have reprimanded before, but this time you need to walk away and ignore it so you don't snap....then do that.
    I am not a smacker, and I don't go for bribery....I find natural consequences to be the best way to teach my kids. Parenting is hard work. Don't be so hard on yourself.

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to Full House For This Useful Post:

    Wise Enough  (23-11-2015)


 

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