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  1. #11
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    Quote Originally Posted by meredithgrey View Post
    I think the question you should be asking is why did that make you feel uncomfortable and vulnerable?

    What preconceived judgements do you have about teenagers, a couple in their 20's and a man on this own that makes you feel this way?

    They may not have realised it was a Babes in Arms session, it may have been the only session time they could make, they may have come for the cheaper tickets.

    Babes in Arms are not restricted to only those that have a baby with them - they are simply a scheduled movie session where it's appropriate to bring along a baby/toddler who may make noise.

    Stop looking for sinister ulterior motives and have a good look at yourself.
    Excuse me? Someone wake up on the wrong side of the bed? Personal attack much

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  3. #12
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    No I wouldn't. The session I go to is popular with white collars on their lunch break.

    It's the perfect occasion to catch a new release on a cheap ticket.

  4. #13
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    Quote Originally Posted by maternidade View Post
    Would you find it strange for non parents at baby in arms movies? As it teenagers, a couple in their 20's and a man on his own ( all of which were on their own and not with someone that has a child.)
    As far as I can tell, this is the question part of the post?
    Maybe it's just me but it seems a bit beside the point to be questioning why the OP feels what she feels.

    Anyway, no I wouldn't find it odd, my Nana and my Great Uncle used to always go to those sessions because they were cheaper.

  5. #14
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    Default Non parents at baby in arms movies

    Quote Originally Posted by meredithgrey View Post
    Well why did you feel vulnerable and uncomfortable by these people being present at a babes in arms session? What was it that made you feel that way?
    @meredithgrey what is it with the aggressive challenging of the OP?! I don't think she should have to explain why she felt vulnerable or have to defend her feelings.
    I've only been to a handful of the sessions when my DD1 was really little and I liked that I felt I could totally relax with my 'tribe', as it were (ie: mums of little, sometimes screamy, sometimes hungry, sometimes stinky babies!). I could also totally feel
    comfortable breastfeeding with a little less discretion (I loathe that word!) than I might normally out in public. That said, I probably wouldn't have a problem with a handful of non-parents at the session, but if they outnumbered the mums/dads and babies, I would definitely be less comfortable.

  6. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by rainbow road View Post
    I wouldn't because I go to babes in arms sessions without my babe because they're so much cheaper than regular sessions!
    Tight ****!

  7. #16
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    Quote Originally Posted by meredithgrey View Post
    Then OP should have just left it with her question instead of going on to say that she felt uncomfortable etc because all these non-parent people were there.
    Why?
    She was just sharing how she felt.
    I don't know why she felt vulnerable but she did and it seemed a bit OTT for you to give her a dressing down for it.
    I know tone can't be conveyed a lot of the time in text but to me (and I'm not trying to be aggressive or b1tchy) it felt like you were pretty much shaming her for feeling the way she did.
    Anyway, hope that makes sense!

  8. #17
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    Quote Originally Posted by meredithgrey View Post
    Because when people use phrases like a "man by himself" in the same sentence as "feeling uncomfortable" you really gotta wonder if there was something specific that they did, or if it was pre conceived judgement?

    Because I am really quite sick of preconceived judgement about people when they've done nothing to justify it.

    If she'd said "I felt uncomfortable because every time my baby made a noise I got glared at by someone who didn't have a baby" then that it is a completely fair call and not okay for a babes in arms session.

    But feeling uncomfortable just because a man is sitting by himself in a cinema? That to me says a lot more about the person feeling uncomfortable then the poor bloke just wanting to watch a movie.

    Babes in arms isn't just restricted to those that have babies. It's a session where bringing a baby that'll make noise is okay.

    As long as they're not being douchebags to the people that have babies along with them, then people without babies have the exact same right to be there.
    But haven't you sort of done the same thing? Made a pre conceived judgement about the OP? Without really knowing why she felt vulnerable? Her history etc...

    Again, not trying to be argumentative and sorry for derailing OP! I do agree with your thoughts @meredithgrey but not necessarily with your initial delivery.

  9. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by meredithgrey View Post
    Hence why I asked what it was about those people that made her feel uncomfortable and vulnerable.
    I think you also told her to take a long, hard, look at herself?
    If that was me, I'd be telling you jack about why I feel the way I feel after that!
    And again, it's kinda none of your business in my opinion - you could have just answered the question. You could have avoided the thread if it bothered you so much. You could have worded your thoughts in a less hostile way.
    Look, I dunno. I don't want to get into a tit for tat thing - which I'm currently engaging in so I'm calling myself a pot and kettle right now!
    Anyway, I just felt for the OP and thought your original response was harsh but it's all good.
    Peace out.

  10. #19
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    Quote Originally Posted by meredithgrey View Post
    But feeling uncomfortable just because a man is sitting by himself in a cinema? That to me says a lot more about the person feeling uncomfortable then the poor bloke just wanting to watch a movie.
    .
    If the dude knew it was a parents and bubs movie and went alone anyway then I would (rightly or wrongly) worry about his motives and make an effort to ensure I wasn't seated near him.

    Yes my views would probably be influences by my life experiences, cultural views and biases.

  11. #20
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    Would I be bothered by it? No

    Would I think it's weird? Yes

    I do think it weird that the people you mentioned would go to a babes in arms session. I would possibly be concerned that they hadn't been informed that it WAS in fact a babes in arms session and that they were going to get annoyed if my baby cried, and then I'd feel like I had to shoosh my baby or leave if they did cry because there were non parents there.

    I used to go to babes in arms sessions heaps once upon a time, and never saw non parents there. So yeah, I'd find it odd.


 

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