@FirstTimeMummy2012 I think you are quite within your rights to have your DH respect and appreciate you, and by the sound of it, he isn't doing that right now. To ridicule your business as "a hobby" is demeaning and not OK.
I know for myself that I am absolutely 100% happy doing all the household stuff (and remember I don't have children!), if I get my needs met in other ways. So I would much prefer that DH take me out on a date night and spend some quality time with me, rather than do some housework. If I feel loved and appreciated, it's a non-issue. So I think knowing what fills up your "love tank" is really important, and then communicating that to your DH. It doesn't sound like it's necessarily about the housework itself, but it is the fact that you're not appreciated or respected, or getting your needs met in the ways that you need.
I'm really clear on what I need, and that is quality time. If I don't get that, then yep, I get resentful. And also, I'm not a complete martyr! Once I've got my business back on track and am earning an income again, then I get a cleaner in and an ironing lady and DH has to help out more for sure. It's more of an arrangement we have now that works for us, but it's always open to change as our circumstances change.
I think definitely exploring what it is that you need and then communicating about it will help to recognise where the issues really lie. Maybe it is him helping out more, but maybe it's something else?