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  1. #1
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    Default Great divorce

    Interested in opinions and experiences. A friend and I have been debating whether it is possible/common/healthy to have a divorce where both parents stay friends, do things together with kids and help one another out. I don't know anyone who has done this personally and wonder if there is a reason for that. Is it human nature that when kids and money are involved it gets messy? Also. ..is it only possible until someone repartners and therefore better to cut ties earlier?

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    Both H and his ex say that since H and I met, things have been easier.

    They are not friends, but I don't believe they hate each other.
    They just were a bad idea, and do not get along.

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    My parents have been divorced for 20 years and have a great relationship. Certainly my dad gets on better with my mum than I do! My mum even went to my dad's wedding! There was some tension in the early years, but they dealt with it well.

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    We are friends with my husbands ex. It took them a little while at the start but he has always supported her and helped her out. To the point he let ex, their kids and her new boyfriend move in with him while they got on their feet after the house they were living in was sold from under them. He also got them both high paying mine jobs that allowed them to set themselves up and buy a house etc. I came onto the scene towards the end of this arrangement. We've gotten on from the start. Don't get me wrong we still have our moments but nothing that isn't sorted very quickly. They were together from a very young age and were never suited. The kids are settled and quite well adjust considering. She recently moved them a long way away from us for a new life for her and though it hurts like hell everyone seems to be adjusting ok. It has been much easier on the kids thinking their parents are still good friends.

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    I know people who have remained friends with their exes.

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    I know people who have stayed friends with their ex's.
    I even know a couple where it was the wife had an affair with her husband's best friend...and somehow they managed to come through the other side of that and got along really well.

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    I think my parents were/are pretty close to what you've described. They were great coparents after separating, family events still alway include both parents (even after one repartnered).
    ...Or maybe they were just really good at hiding any conflict from the children

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    I never hang out with my exH, but it is amicable. Makes it so much easier. DP on the other hand is definitely not on talking terms with his exW, and it's very awkward. Mostly though I feel sorry for his kids as it makes arranging things difficult due to the tension.

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    One of my friends has this. They get along far better now that they are divorced than they ever did when they were married

    Both have re-partnered, and the 4 of them get along very well ... share custody, help each other out and have a great relationship with the kids and each other

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    Wow! This is great! It seems it must be possible!


 

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