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  1. #1
    Mod-Nomsie's Avatar
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    Default WWYD: Discipline

    Scenario:
    Me: (placing high quality pedestal fan in boys bedroom. FYI boys are due to turn 7 on Saturday) this is an excellent fan. It's not a cheap one like you're used to having. Don't muck around with it, or you will go back to having cheap ones that are terrible.
    I'm serious. This fan is expensive but excellent. I'm trusting you not to be silly with this fan. Do you understand?
    Both boys: yes.

    **5 minutes later I go to the toilet and I can hear someone playing with the fan. I hear ds2 tell ds1 to stop. I walk in there to warn them again.**

    Me: ds1, I know you were being silly with that fan.
    Ds1: no.
    Me: don't deny it. Mothers know these things. I will take that fan away from you if you can't follow basic rules.

    **cut to two minutes later and I can hear a crack in the bedroom. Ds2 comes to the lounge in a flap saying ds1 has broken it. I go into their room and ds1 is hiding under his doona, sobbing. I look at the fan and see a blade has been snapped off. There is a faint burning smell also. Ds2 shows me the stick ds1 has used to jam into the spinning fan, which is what broke the blade.
    I ask ds1 to come out and explain his side of the story- ie give me the answer to "why?!"
    All he can do is sob and tell me he is a bad boy.
    Both boys are given a hasty and I will admit ranty sermon on doing what they are told. They are put to bed with no exceptions. (They like to have time to read and this was taken off them)**

    I'm still upset. In the scheme of things, it is only a $40 pedestal fan. But it's the deliberately doing things that he was told not to do that has upset me.
    So- is there anything else you would do to discipline my ds1? He needs to learn that if I ask him not to do something, I expect that he will not do it. I'm kind of seething.

  2. #2
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    I take their most prized possession/toy and take it away right as they go to play with it. away for a month. sorry but i told you the rules! If they keep playing up i threaten to sell it or bin it.

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  4. #3
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    I'm very tempted to say to make him sleep somewhere really hot tonight. That may be a little mean though.
    Perhaps some sort of chore to earn money to replace it.

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    Mod-Nomsie  (14-10-2015)

  6. #4
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    I've read on here before about getting them to come up with some way of paying to replace the fan. Obviously you can't just leave them fanless but you don't wanted to just replace it and have them not appreciate that that takes time & money.

    From memory a hubber suggested getting them to do extra chores to earn money to pay for it, or chose a toy to sell to pay for it.

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    Mod-Nomsie  (14-10-2015)

  8. #5
    Mod-Nomsie's Avatar
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    Is it not really a done thing any more to take something away from them for either a set period of time or until they earn it back? Eg he loves minecraft so I was thinking he wasn't allowed any computer time for a month?
    The drawback is I know he would sneak on when I am occupied in other activities and I can't check on him (ie putting dd to bed) and even if I keep the computer logged off, his twin would probably ask to play then let him play when im not looking...

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    I would confiscate his favourite thing for... maybe 2 weeks or so.
    Then I would make him do lots of paid chores (and some for relatives if you're able?) to earn money to replace the fan.
    And yes I would leave them fanless!

    I would be so cranky!! You were so clear with the rules!

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    When my DSD smashed her phone screen when she was here (for the umpteenth time because she kept taking the uncool cases off when at home with Mum). I took the phone and paid the $80 to get it fixed. Then we sat down together and made a list of jobs and I put a price to each one. She was home for a week for the holidays so she had to work off the list and do jobs until she had done enough to pay for the $80. She sewed bibs to sell, washed the cars, did odd cleaning jobs etc. I kept the phone on the fridge until she had earnt $80 to pay for it. Obviously your kids are a bit younger but it may be an idea for you to try so they get a bit of an idea about the value of things? You could use more age appropriate jobs maybe?

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    I agree with pp, I would write up a list of chores with a dollar value next to it and tick them off till he has paid you back the money the fan cost and just consistently follow through until he had completed them.

    I snickered at your recounting of events Noms, your writing skills are great! ( Not that I thought what happened was funny - heck I've raised boys and remember when they were small, the two youngest poured 10 litres of milk on the lounge floor - good times indeedy!! )

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    Mod-Nomsie  (15-10-2015)

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    I wouldn't have punished ds2.

    I would ask him what he thinks a fair punishment is. If my kids do something like that, I take something away. Whether it's the iPad, not going to activity/sport/party.

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  17. #10
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    Mokeyspokey was this your face with the milk thing?

    ImageUploadedByThe Bub Hub1444819555.469576.jpg

    I bet you were devastated considering you use nail scissors on your lawn and iron your gussets and things...
    @Mod-Nomsie I agree that the dollar value for chores seems appropriate. He probably doesn't know why he did it so can't answer that question!

    It's good that DS2 was trying to get him to stop, that takes some guts... You must be spewing 😳

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