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  1. #101
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    Yes I was just wondering if she wrote it in the letter.

    For what it's worth my mum is a special needs teacher and her advice was never tell the parent if you suspect something. She said you have to wait for them to bring it up. I suspected one of the girls in my mums group was ASD but followed my mums advice till one day her mum talked about the issues she was having and I mentioned it sounded a lot like my nephew who has autism. Thankfully it was well received and she had her daughter assessed and was diagnosed as ASD.

  2. #102
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    Default Another daycare issue

    Quote Originally Posted by Wise Enough View Post
    When the carer wrote the letter is autism mentioned anywhere? It doesn't need context. As a previous poster said you can state the facts without making a diagnosis.

    I'm curious if she actually did suggest ASD.
    To answer your question, she randomly mentioned ASD in a conversation we had and when I questioned her and said 'is that what you think my DS has?' She replied with 'I have studied blah blah blah and I can do a general assessment for you when you DS is next in'

    After that she wrote an email, as I asked her to write it out as I wouldn't remember it all so I could pass it onto our psych, which she did, but she didn't mention ASD in the actual letter. Now I don't know if it was because we had a discussion on the phone prior to her writing her email where I told her the reasons *i* think my son does certain things, or if she was just covering her own *** as she knew she shouldn't be diagnosing anything.
    Last edited by SAgirl; 16-10-2015 at 05:56.

  3. #103
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    Sounds very @rse covery!

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    SAgirl  (16-10-2015)

  5. #104
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    So she never actually said (in person) that your son had ASD?. And she wrote a letter listing observations of your DS where ASD was not mentioned?

    Op: I understand how these things can be upsetting. I am going through something similar with my Ds1 and at first the feedback was quite jarring. Now I am used to it and am slowly become an expert at telling when a carer is putting their personal 'spin' on something.

    Any chance that due to your love for your DS, and the intense feelings of the need to protect him, that you are reading too much into things?

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    cheeeeesecake  (16-10-2015),heplusme  (16-10-2015)

  7. #105
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    Default Another daycare issue

    Quote Originally Posted by VicPark View Post
    So she never actually said (in person) that your son had ASD?. And she wrote a letter listing observations of your DS where ASD was not mentioned?

    Op: I understand how these things can be upsetting. I am going through something similar with my Ds1 and at first the feedback was quite jarring. Now I am used to it and am slowly become an expert at telling when a carer is putting their personal 'spin' on something.

    Any chance that due to your love for your DS, and the intense feelings of the need to protect him, that you are reading too much into things?
    No, I stated from the beginning that she implied he had ASD, how else would you take it when she says 'I think he needs OT and there is a place down the road who does OT, psych and deals with kids with ASD, they are having a meeting for parents of kids who have ASD and I've left the details on the table outside for any parents interested'

    I don't know how any parent wouldn't read into that that she was implying he may have ASD, and then when I outright asked her if that's what she thought he had, she said 'well I've studied blah blah blah and I can do a general assessment'

    If she didn't think he had ASD, then she would have said 'no I was just mentioning it because it's part of the service that place provides'

    Not to mention, everyone I've spoken to says you don't just 'throw it out there'. You call a meeting and sit the parents down and voice concerns.

    It's the unprofessional manner in which she raised it which has ****ed me off.

    She caused us a LOT of stress, we didn't sleep for a week. (Amongst other things).

    And yes I admit of course I'm a protective mother who would rather not hear there is something wrong with her DS. The way it was brought up upset me the most.

    Edit: sorry I don't mean to come across blunt or rude, just at swimming and watching DS so trying to type it out quick
    Last edited by SAgirl; 16-10-2015 at 08:34.

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  9. #106
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    I don't blame you for being annoyed. I can't really understand what he's done that has made then flag his behaviour...all kids "crack it" sometimes, particularly when frustrated over not being able to do something or tired!
    Also you mention he is normally very shy. I read an article recently as my DD is extremely shy.if I find it I'll link it but basically it said about 15% of kids were "very shy" and sometimes other carers misunderstand their behaviour. I've had my MIL mention ASD with my DD because she isn't affectionate with them (she hardly sees them!) And she has a speech delay (she's only 2.5 yo). At home she tries to talk and is very happy, plays perfectly and is affectionate with people she's close to. Her playgroup also had a speech therapist there and she didn't think DDs behaviour was unusual, just typical of shy kids.
    Hate the pressure and stress some "educators" cause over very young kids which may just need a bit more time to catch up development-wise!

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  11. #107
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    Mmmm so in the letter we received from the centre leader about DS, it says

    'the centre is also looking at applying for inclusion support funding to provide a permanent support worker for DS which would be highly beneficial to his development.'

    Now, when I read that, and when our psych read that, we all felt that it was a definite, as in, the centre was going to provide this for DS. The psych said she feels it's OTT but we should accept it as it can't hurt. So anyway, after speaking to the centre this morning to clarify what they mean, as in, is this a definite thing or is it just a 'thought', turns out, if we want this, DS has to be 'properly assessed'. So I don't know how to take that. I haven't had a chance to speak with the centre leader again about this, but it sounds like it's not going to be provided unless he is assessed and then comes back with markets for ASD?

    Am I reading that right? I don't know how these things work...

  12. #108
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    They are just after funding for another member of staff they don't have to pay for.

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  14. #109
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    Quote Originally Posted by SAgirl View Post
    Mmmm so in the letter we received from the centre leader about DS, it says

    'the centre is also looking at applying for inclusion support funding to provide a permanent support worker for DS which would be highly beneficial to his development.'

    Now, when I read that, and when our psych read that, we all felt that it was a definite, as in, the centre was going to provide this for DS. The psych said she feels it's OTT but we should accept it as it can't hurt. So anyway, after speaking to the centre this morning to clarify what they mean, as in, is this a definite thing or is it just a 'thought', turns out, if we want this, DS has to be 'properly assessed'. So I don't know how to take that. I haven't had a chance to speak with the centre leader again about this, but it sounds like it's not going to be provided unless he is assessed and then comes back with markets for ASD?

    Am I reading that right? I don't know how these things work...
    They have to apply for funding for the staff member to look after your DS 1:1. Its a government body that approves funding (inclusion SA from memory?) & they will only give funding if your DS is diagnosed with a special need such as ASD. Even then, he will have to check the right boxes to say they need an extra support person for him.
    I dont think its fair to presume they 'want a staff member they dont have to pay for', IME the centee wouldnt even bother going down this route unless there they think there is a good chance he would get the funding, & they feel like he needs extra support. It does seem a bit OTT from the info you've given us, but I wonder if he might be a bit more of a handful than they're letting on?Either way,you'll find out with his assessment. All the best with it,I know it's a confronting thibg to be facing.

  15. #110
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    Quote Originally Posted by lilypily View Post
    They are just after funding for another member of staff they don't have to pay for.
    Or perhaps they don't feel it's appropriate to assign the OP's DS an extra staff member unless he has been formally assessed as requiring that support?

    Formal assessments prior to assigning additional teaching resources is standard from my experience.


 

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