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  1. #1
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    Default How can I make dh understand about anxiety?

    How can i make dh understand?

    When I end up really stressed & anxious in the evening then i literally cannot get to sleep. Ive told him that over & over & over again & he just doesn't seem to get it. He thinks i can just 'calm down' like its the easiest thing in the world.

    Tonight we had a fight & i could feel myself getting really stressed & worked up so i decided to walk away - give myself some space to try & calm down before it got to the point where I couldn't calm down.

    Dh decided to follow me, supposedly to ' talk ' even though I told him multiple times why I had walked away. We ended up screaming at each other & now i certainly wont be sleeping tonight, which is great given i have to work tomorrow.

    This is what happens every time I walk away from an argument. So now i dont know what to do anymore.

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    Hugs. I cannot sleep after an unresolved argument. As you can see I'm still awake!

    What do you do to relax? I'm watching crappie tv and eating chocolate. So by the time I'm done I'm calm and happy enough to sleep in the spare room.

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    Im watching a movie but i know from past experience nothing really works. When im this worked up there doesnt seem to be any way to calm down unfortunately, so ill be watching movies all night then trying to deal with a big problem at work tomorrow with no sleep

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    Sounds silly but have you tried screaming into a pillow? Or even punching one? Maybe a shower or bath might help calm you down?

    Next time you try to walk away and get followed go for a drive or walk just get out of the house.

    When you're not fighting explain to your DH (calmly) that sometimes when you are arguing you need to walk away and collect your thoughts and that you would appreciate it if you weren't followed.

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    Can you take a mild sedative? And then have a hot shower and try and rest if not sleep?

    You are very fatalistic @heartstringz.... And it's not healthy. You need to deal with your anxiety and how to manage if.

  6. The Following 2 Users Say Thank You to Rose&Aurelia&Hannah For This Useful Post:

    Happymum2  (28-09-2015),snowqu33n  (29-09-2015)

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    Im currently weaning ds off the one remaining breastfeed, then im going on meds. I dont have anything i can take for sleep unfortunately

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    Try polaramine. It's a drowsy antihistamine that's breastfeeding safe. I take a 1/2 tablet as needed.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Rose&Aurelia View Post
    Try polaramine. It's a drowsy antihistamine that's breastfeeding safe. I take a 1/2 tablet as needed.
    Yes this. It was my go to for hayfever when I was breastfeeding but I could only take it at night because it made me drowsy.

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    Default How can I make dh understand about anxiety?

    I have been through this recently and also had a bad episode last year where I couldn't sleep, then the anxiety of not sleeping made it worse so I slept hardly at all which then made the anxiety worse and so on. I would get to around 7pm and the anxiety of what the night would bring was dreadful. Last year when it happened I took Valium and temazapam which helped me break the cycle and get back to normal. I am currently breastfeeding so no Valium but for 2 nights took temaz which is safe when feeding (for short term use) and again it helped break that no sleep cycle. It's short acting so only lasts 4 hours and doesn't make you feel drowsy. Although dr did say Valium is safe when feeding too I decided to just rake the temaz as I didn't want to over medicate.
    My dp doesn't get it either and tells me to just relax which really doesn't help. I hope it gets better soon for you. Insomnia mixed with anxiety is the pits 😔

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    Do you see a psych? Next session can he come so that the psych can educate him on anxiety and how to handle it?


 

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