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  1. #461
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    Jennski: Thanks for your beautiful words! I was also treated by Dr W at CFC and would recommend him and the clinic to anyone. But most people on the thread speak highly of all the doctors there.

    Re choosing a donor: I definitely put health considerations first, followed by height (both myself and my DH are fairly tall), personality and education. Physical attributes were last on my list. I did agonise about choosing someone who, although they ticked all the other boxes, didn't have the same hair and eye colour as me or my DH, but in the end I decided that the other things were more important. And funnily enough, despite her dark brown eyes supposedly being dominant, my daughter has blue eyes like her dad (although am aware that could still change). Even if you do get a perfect match, remember that genetics can always pull in a hair/eye colour from a grandparent on either side so don't get too caught up with it.
    And finally, as I think someone else said, when your baby is born, all of this is irrelevant because when you finally see your baby, you will think they are beautiful and absolutely perfect regardless of eye and hair colour, skin tone, height, etc, etc.
    Good luck to anyone choosing their donor...it is the hardest part, once your decision is made, you are on your way!
    Last edited by Patsy73; 30-10-2015 at 12:08.

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    Jennski  (30-10-2015),Outoftime  (30-10-2015)

  3. #462
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    Thank you so much girls for your information. It is all very helpful and much appreciated. I'm not sure how other people feel but we don't want to tell anyone about the donor egg part and so therefore are also looking for a donor with the same blood type as myself. Talk about narrowing down our choices. Its a personal decision and I don't want anyone judging or talking about our situation so it is between myself and my husband.

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    JulieMalooley  (30-10-2015)

  5. #463
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    Lastchance75: While I totally respect your decision, I will also share with you that I held firm to that same view for a long time. I was unwavering in my desire for this decision to be mine and my DP's alone, and for no one to be empowered to sit in judgement of our situation and/or decision. There are too many foolish, self-righteous, ignorant people who I did not want to "hear" from regarding our decision.

    And then during our therapy session, prior to our first transfer, our social worker/therapist shed some light on the negative power of a secret. She also highlighted that honesty and total transparency would allow us to manage the flow of information and details about our decision, on our terms. She also encouraged me to journal my thoughts throughout my journey, particularly as I would continue to wrestle the 'secret'-thing to the ground.

    A funny thing happened -- one that I never expected -- I became more comfortable, and convinced about the negativity of a secret as big as this.

    We remained tight-lipped about our journey, until we returned home in June to the devastating realization, that in fact my 30-year old donor's eggs were more ****e than my own, and resultingly, I was not pregnant. Then the flood gates opened for me, and I haven't looked back!

    The first few times I expected judgement and lots of morality. I got neither. Instead we were showered with loads of love, support and fascination about our chosen path. Even the most dense and those incapable of filtering their thoughts, at the best of times, have amazed me, when I've shared the details of our journey.

    Humanity might surprise you positively. And yet, I'm hardly meaning to seem pushy. You need to do what is right for you. I merely wanted to share, because had I not experienced all of this myself, I'm not sure I would have believed it ...

    Lots of love and strength to you, as you continue on this exciting, and life-changing journey.

    Xoxo
    CJC
    Last edited by cjocoh71; 30-10-2015 at 15:41.

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  7. #464
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    Lastchance

    I tend to agree with CJC but we all make our own decisions on this path. To help with your search re Blood grouping, you don't have to have the donor with the same blood group as you. A child of 2 people can have either parent's blood group or a combo, so do some research on blood groups and you will find that if that really is a critical factor for you, it won't be as hard as you think to find a compatible blood group. Here is a quick calculator that might be helpful:- http://www.endmemo.com/medical/bloodtype.php

  8. #465
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    My egg and sperm donor have different blood groups than me. Medically it doesn't matter and finding an egg donor with the same blood group doesn't mean your baby will have the same as you.

  9. #466
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    We were looking for same blood too, and thought we'd found it with a profile we liked, b- but after our decision and a fair way along we found out she was b+ and this I can say was the only thing in the process that annoyed me. As my Dh is o- which meant we were rh compatible but now we arnt and as + is dominant the baby is likely to be so which will make baby and me rh incompatible which they are good at handling now with anti d, but an increased risk I wish we didn't have to worry about as me and Dh wouldn't have the issue naturally .... But this is one of a multitude of risks so not I guess a big deal in the scheme of things and they say more of an issue with number 2 if also incompatible as you may have developed immunity with baby number 1.

  10. #467
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    Yes, I am A- and my donors were A+ & O+. All it meant were a couple of anti d injections for me and testing the babies blood groups when they were born. They were both + so I had another anti d injection.

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  12. #468
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    Hello all. I have been following this post for a long time and have deliberated on going down the egg donor path. After an unsuccessful FET transfer in August I decided that my only choice was DE. Like some of you I also deliberated on which clinic to choose, looking at clinics in Czech Republic and Spain. I chose SA because my FS in Perth spoke so highly of it. My DH and I went through the donor selection process and we have finally chosen one. Thanks for all the advice on this forum. It helped us a lot! We wanted to go to SA in January but the donor we wanted could donate in March at the earliest so I guess that means we are going in March! I must admit that March seems so far away but I'm sure it will come quicker than I think. All the best to you ladies on the forum with your journey.

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  14. #469
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    Welcome aspire best wishes on your journey

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    Aspire  (01-11-2015)

  16. #470
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    Hi girls,
    Welcome CJ, lastchance, aspire, and anyone else I may have forgot! My head has been all over the place lately, heading to CT in 2 weeks!! I've had a hard time keeping up with everyone. Spent the day getting on top of things here so finally feel a bit more ready about everything.
    Just wanted to ask if anyone has done the shark dive? My hubby keen, me not so much. Just wondering if its worth the money? Elle gave me the crowd she went with and they look great ( as far as boats and sharks go!) I think I might book one this w/e or is it best to wait and book when we arrive?
    Hope everyone is having a nice relaxing w/e!
    Lauren

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