I would be mortified if my kids heard me and equally if my husband told me he was finding it a major turn off. I used to be super loud and quickly learned to tone it down as I worried about neighbors in apartment living after I heard one lady really going for it. Still thoroughly enjoy myself in a much quieter way.
I know you said you've spoken to her but does she know that it's turning you off? She doesn't worry about the kids hearing?
I am so, so, so grateful for always having the bedroom the furthest from the master bedroom in the house.....
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