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  1. #11
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    Meals and short planned visits were awesome!

  2. #12
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    Hmm. I never expected anything. I just handed baby over for cuddles.. After all they were there to meet bub not do my housework or bring me meals. Never occurred to me to ask them to do things for me.. I guess times have changed !

  3. #13
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    BH-KatiesMum is offline Community Manager
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pearlygirl View Post
    I totally wanted people to come too, I just didn't want them staying for hours and hours in the early days/weeks. Eg: My bf and her DH came to my house a few days after he was born. They stayed for so long we had to give them dinner and then they still didn't go home for a few more hours DH has to politely kick them out

    yeah that is hard.

    My Mum used to come over 4 or 5 times a week - just for about 1/2 hr at dinner time. Enough for her to hold bubs while I ate dinner and had a shower. (DH cooked dinner so I didnt have to do that) It was fabulous.

  4. #14
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    Just sit and visit. Mum or sister only to help with housework. Maybe talk other kids for a hour or so.

  5. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by BH-KatiesMum View Post
    I actually wanted people to come ... I was going out of my mind with the 'aloneness' (though I love the peace now )

    but I would have really liked them to call before they came to ask if I needed bread or milk or anything picked up from the shops.
    That would have been great.

    Also I preferred others to hold baby while I did stuff! So basically visitors to be happy to sit there and hold the baby while I do dishes, fold laundry, have a shower, cook etc. My baby likes to be held 24/7 so a break is very nice.

  6. The Following User Says Thank You to babyno1onboard For This Useful Post:

    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (17-09-2015)

  7. #16
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    Not turn up for another few weeks.

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    Cicho  (17-09-2015),emski72  (18-09-2015)

  9. #17
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    I would love:

    * weed the garden / mow the grass (because it's way down our list of job priorities, but seeing it not done drives me mad)

    * look after the baby and toddler while I sleep or get other jobs done

    * give the toddler some one on one time (or take him out on an excursion) so he's less insanely jealous and I get time alone with the baby

    * come shopping with us, so there's someone else to wrangle my toddler (because shopping alone with the two kids is hell!)


    If only....... I at least have a cleaner fortnightly to keep the bathrooms/floors slightly more under control.

  10. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pearlygirl View Post
    One thing that I really wanted people to do though is: Go home!!! I love seeing you but please, go home now so I can feed the baby and have a rest. Lol some people just didn't get the hint
    I was just coming to add this. Short visits. And to check when would be a good time to come, not just show up. I ended up putting a not on the door "baby sleeping and so am I" as no joke, people would always rock up just as I'd got the baby down and was about to go have a nap. The first few weeks are a huge adjustment and most mums need to rest when they can!

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    Pearlygirl  (17-09-2015)

  12. #19
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    Hmmm I seem to be different from most... I want visits! Lots of them! I used to feel so isolated- even though I was not one to be housebound- but the adult interaction is what I really missed for a long long time.
    So yep all I wanted was visits from friends, they could stay as long as they like. In fact some of my favourite visits was when a few friends would come, stay until dinner time and then say "oh crap it's dinner time, I'll order some takeaway for everyone".

    In terms of cleaning, I feel quite awkward having people clean my mess, so I'd probably rather not. Although PP's have mentioned floors, that would have been ok.

    Meals were good for my first born, but after that, with a fussy toddler or 2, I always felt so guilty that they wouldn't eat some donated meals because they didn't like them.

  13. The Following User Says Thank You to CMF For This Useful Post:

    Rose&Aurelia&Hannah  (17-09-2015)

  14. #20
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    I agree with all the comments to bring food - but I am from a feeding-people culture!

    And also, make it a zero impact visit (e.g. Don't make any work for the parents because of your visit - bring a plate, make your own cuppa, put your cup in the dishwasher when you're finished) this does go against my hostly instincts but the last thing new parents need is another person to clean up after!

  15. The Following 3 Users Say Thank You to gumnut babies For This Useful Post:

    Pearlygirl  (17-09-2015),Tiny Dancer  (17-09-2015),wobbleyhorse  (17-09-2015)


 

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