Again, more posts appeared after I had typed out my response, so I apologise if the order of comments doesn't make much sense. I know I have caused all of this on my own. Though I can't regret having my daughter, I obviously regret the way she was brought into the world. This is what makes it hard to be selfish again and leave, there are other people involved and maybe I do just need to suck it up. I'm just not sure how to do that without becoming too miserable to be an effective parent for her.