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  1. #31
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    When my kids were 9 and 7 they were allowed to walk to friend's houses within a 4 block radius together, and the 9 year old was allowed to on their own. We knew where they were though, and it was only for arranged play dates. No walking the streets just because at that age, or going 15 minutes away. It's not something I was comfortable with for that age. But I happily let my kid stay home by themselves for an hour or so from about 9 years of age, as long as they were trustworthy. I have a friend who's 9 and 7 year old walk home from school and let themselves in to the house until their dad gets home about an hour later from work. She trusts her kids, and there has never been an issue.

    Our school zoning area is not a big zone, and our kids are encouraged to walk to school, with or without a parent. In fact, by year 3 the school says that it's probably time for parent's to start letting their kids walk to school on their own, or with friends. My oldest was one of the minority when it came to walking to school with a parent at that age. Most got themselves to school. But, due to one road that we have to cross to get to school that repeatedly has cars running red lights I said no. The kids who walk to school without a parent don't cross that road. If we lived in a different street I would have been okay with it.
    I also didn't just send my 9 and 7 year old without any type of preparation. We built up to it.

    Oh, and we live in a city too. For whatever reason cities get a bad rep as being unsafe for kids.

    Oh, and also....my mum was an overprotective parent so I didn't get sent out to go and play in the park for hours etc., but my DH's rule as a kid was 'be home for dinner.'
    Last edited by Full House; 08-09-2015 at 14:15.

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  3. #32
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    Quote Originally Posted by Party of Three View Post
    When my kids were 9 and 7 they were allowed to walk to friend's houses within a 4 block radius together, and the 9 year old was allowed to on their own. We knew where they were though, and it was only for arranged play dates. No walking the streets just because at that age, or going 15 minutes away. It's not something I was comfortable with for that age. But I happily let my kid stay home by themselves for an hour or so from about 9 years of age, as long as they were trustworthy. I have a friend who's 9 and 7 year old walk home from school and let themselves in to the house until their dad gets home about an hour later from work. She trusts her kids, and there has never been an issue.

    Our school zoning area is not a big zone, and our kids are encouraged to walk to school, with or without a parent. In fact, by year 3 the school says that it's probably time for parent's to start letting their kids walk to school on their own, or with friends. My oldest was one of the minority when it came to walking to school with a parent at that age. Most got themselves to school. But, due to one road that we have to cross to get to school that repeatedly has cars running red lights I said no. The kids who walk to school without a parent don't cross that road. If we lived in a different street I would have been okay with it.
    I also didn't just send my 9 and 7 year old without any type of preparation. We built up to it.

    Oh, and we live in a city too. For whatever reason cities get a bad rep as being unsafe for kids.

    Oh, and also....my mum was an overprotective parent so I didn't get sent out to go and play in the park for hours etc., but my DH's rule as a kid was 'be home for dinner.'
    I see this totally different to going to a wondering the streets for 5 hours not knowing how to get home.

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  5. #33
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    Quote Originally Posted by LoveLivesHere View Post
    I see this totally different to going to a wondering the streets for 5 hours not knowing how to get home.
    The OP said she thinks the kids don't know how to get home because they are new to the area, but assumptions are not facts. There is every chance that kid knows how to get home. I have one child who is terrible with directions and would be hopeless in a new area, and one child who can give me directions, and has been since they were old enough to communicate properly. So a new area would be no issue for that child.

    The 5 hours thing doesn't sit will with me, but without knowing any other details it would only stop me from sending my kid there for a play date due to the more relaxed rules regarding supervision, it wouldn't involve me calling docs.

  6. #34
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    Quote Originally Posted by LoveLivesHere View Post
    I was a mum 20 + years ago and not one of the parents I know would do this. Even 40 years ago my parents wouldn't have. Dh parents would have. Than again he was abandoned In a orphanage for 2 years when he was a young child. Mum went on to have more kids in the 2 years he and his siblings were there.


    So yes some would have and some still do but it certainly wasn't the majority 20 years ago.
    Well in my experience, it was the majority. My brothers and all of their friends roamed the streets from a young age, and I babysat loads and loads of kids and they were all allowed out on their own from around 8 or so. That was about 15 years ago. It was very common. Just because that wasn't your experience, doesn't mean it's not true. You are talking about YOUR family and YOUR friends. I am talking about at least 20 different families of all different backgrounds and parenting styles. It WAS common. Where I live it is still common. And if anyone had reported a child back then for being out alone, everyone would have been utterly flabbergasted about it. Clearly the OP's supervisor agrees it's not reportable as she was advised not to report it.

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    Wow. When I was 10 me and my sisters younger them I played at the park across the road from our house.. My parents were strict. We were fine. We had a curfew.

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    I'm another mandatory reporter... I brought up a very similar question with my boss when I saw 4 children aged 10, 10, 7 & 6 pushing each other in shopping trolleys in a carpark. One of these children is often suspended from school for behavioural issues. I really like each and every one of them but i know how thoughtless they can be. I was so worried they'd smash into the parked cars around the place. One 10 year old told me that mum was at home and he doesn't know what she was doing but step- dad wanted to play the wii in peace. They had to be spoken to by the centre management. They are beautiful kids just with minimal guidelines...

    My boss told me it's a grey area and to document it in their file just in case other things arise. They are known for their 'loose' parenting. I'd freak out having my 7 year old on the loose even with a 10 year old!!!

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    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    What you describe here is exactly what every mother in the history of the world until about 15-20 years ago has done/said.
    Quote Originally Posted by LoveLivesHere View Post
    I was a mum 20 + years ago and not one of the parents I know would do this. Even 40 years ago my parents wouldn't have. Dh parents would have. Than again he was abandoned In a orphanage for 2 years when he was a young child. Mum went on to have more kids in the 2 years he and his siblings were there.


    So yes some would have and some still do but it certainly wasn't the majority 20 years ago.
    Quote Originally Posted by FearlessLeader View Post
    Well in my experience, it was the majority. My brothers and all of their friends roamed the streets from a young age, and I babysat loads and loads of kids and they were all allowed out on their own from around 8 or so. That was about 15 years ago. It was very common. Just because that wasn't your experience, doesn't mean it's not true. You are talking about YOUR family and YOUR friends. I am talking about at least 20 different families of all different backgrounds and parenting styles. It WAS common. Where I live it is still common. And if anyone had reported a child back then for being out alone, everyone would have been utterly flabbergasted about it. Clearly the OP's supervisor agrees it's not reportable as she was advised not to report it.
    I don't get why you are being so aggressive towards me.

    You said every parent. I disagreed.
    Btw my circle of family/friends in those years was was very diverse and more 100 families ( living 3 different towns including overseas.)

    I also said I did see it happen it just wasn't common.

  10. #38
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    Quote Originally Posted by LoveLivesHere View Post
    I don't get why you are being so aggressive towards me.

    You said every parent. I disagreed.
    Btw my circle of family/friends in those years was was very diverse and more 100 families ( living 3 different towns including overseas.)

    I also said I did see it happen it just wasn't common.
    I think it may also depend on where you live?? It was pretty common in my small town but not so common where I live now. Either way it's not something I feel comfortable with - but then I've only just started letting my 7 year old play in the street with the neighbours... With me checking on him every 5 minutes 🙈

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    Yes... I can see how there would be a huge amount of "grey" area...there is a huge difference between kids playing happily at the park with other neighborhood children who's parents know where they are and have behavioral standards and guidelines in place and kids sent out to roam (because the parents dont really care) who are undisciplined and run amok.
    There simply cannot be a blanket rule. Parents have to be allowed some discretion in the way they raise their children and so much is dependent on individual temperament, maturity and education as well as environmental factors.

    Just for the record, it was the norm in my childhood to be out and about in the neighborhood ("come home when it starts getting dark"). The jumble of kids bikes out the front of someone's house was a common sight...no one ever got in trouble or run amok...

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    Quote Originally Posted by Theboys&me View Post
    I think it may also depend on where you live?? It was pretty common in my small town but not so common where I live now. Either way it's not something I feel comfortable with - but then I've only just started letting my 7 year old play in the street with the neighbours... With me checking on him every 5 minutes 🙈
    I agree. That was my point just badly written.


 

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